Advice desperately sought by novice cat owner on caring for stray

[SPerry]

Hi there,

I would really appreciate some advice from seasoned Cat owners on what to do about a "sort of" stray cat I've been looking after. I've never owned a cat before, only dogs and other animals, so I'm very new to this and not quite sure what signs to look out for to understand how well (or not) this poor little cat is being cared for.

For the past two months I've been feeding and watering twice a day a cat who, for as long as i remember, has been living outside in the garden next door. Now it's not a typical garden, more a tip of rubble and weeds. I have lived here for four years and just assumed (naively) the cat was being cared for by the person in the house. It was only when he (a very peculiar man who i never see and other neighbours have issues with) went away for a long time (months) and apparently his brother moved in (6 months ago) that i started thinking this cat is not being looked after.

She was very nervous, at first hissed and ran away from me every time i came to feed her, but she is slowly progressing and now she comes into the kitchen to eat and will let me stroke her while eating. She meows at me, gives me little nibbles and waits by the door morning and evening and even kneaded my knee for the first time the other day which I've read is a great sign!

However, she won't let me close the door behind her when in the kitchen to stay in the house, she still scares quite easily and can sometimes still bite/scratch and is nervous of the other people I live with so i cant keep her inside at night or from the cold.

Question 1: how can i make it so she is comfortable staying in our house at night/in cold weather without undoing all the good progress we made?
I put a box with a hole and blanket in it by where she eats hoping she'll stay and we have a cat flap she doesn't know how to use but no luck...

Also..Last night, for the first time ever, i heard a man come into the garden next door. He whistled and asked "where are you?!" And the cat who was next to me outside ran back over the fence and i heard him greet her and shut the door. This morning though at 6am she's back in my garden being very affectionate and very hungry!

Question 2: How do i know if she is being looked after adequately or not?!

It seems she does have a person in that house still.. But i have no idea the level of care they are giving her. she seems to be outside 90%of the time. She has long fur which doesn't look brushed. she's scared of all the neighbour Cats and gets scratches on her sometimes which don't look treated (and won't let me close enough yet to clean them when it happens). I'm nervous of talking to the man about the cat based on the arguments he had with neighbours and the fear he might just lock her inside for good if he knows I'm feeding her.

Any advice on what i should do? I'd like to adopt her properly so she has the level of care she needs... But i don't want to take her away from an owner if they are looking after her and she won't yet stay in my house. I've been converted to a cat person which i never thought would happen and i really love her and want to help her!!

Please can anyone help me and give me some advice?

[Kay]

It's lovely you should care about this cat, and we all understand how she has got into your heart - what is her name?

A few questions spring to mind - how do you know she is a she? And do you know if she is neutered? If there have been no kittens in the 4 years you have been seeing her almost certainly not though

Are you supplying her with a full day's food? You probably don't know, but if you can say what she takes from you in a typical day that will help

Do you know where she spends the night? Or is it a case of her being inside next door overnight and then put out in the morning? It sounds as if that may be the usual thing because you heard him calling her in

Is it possible she is a stray and the man next door is looking after her like you albeit in a limited way? When he called her did he sound affectionate or exasperated?

With the warmer weather the cat will do fine with the regime you have set up, so there is plenty of time to see if you can move things along

[SPerry]

Hi Kay

Thanks so much for replying to me. In answer to your questions, I don't know for certain she is a "she". I just have a feeling by the way she behaves; she doesn't really spray (I've only seen her do that once) she's pretty calm (other male cats I know seem much more boisterous) there's no evidence of "man parts" (although I guess the cat could have been spayed). However I've never seen any kittens, so either she is actually a he, or she was neutered at some point. I plan on taking her to the vets at some point when she trust me enough to go in a cat box.

In terms of food, I feed her morning and night and each time she has a handful of dry biscuits (Harrington's natural cat food) and a wet pouch of Ian's. I think this is right amount based on the back of the food packet. What do you think? At first she wolfed it down, I've never seen an animal eat so fast and i used to own a Springer spaniel! Now she takes her time and will leave some sometimes which i keep in the fridge for later. This suggests to me she wasn't being fed, at least not regularly, but now she's used to my routine she's not so worried enough to have to eat it all really fast. I also leave outside a bowl of clean water although she prefers to drink from the bird bath!!

Overnight I'm fairly certain she sleeps on a low conservatory of the man's house next door. It's covered in ivy and she hides in there from the other cats. My room overlooks this conservatory (terraced housing) and i often see her there very late at night - she comes by around 10-11pm sometimes too which seems to me that she sleeps outside the majority of the time.

The man called her, not in a super friendly way like animal lovers speak to their pets, but didn't sound exasperated either. More just monotone. I spoke to another neighbour about the cat who has lived here a long time, she told me the wife of the man used to live in the house but something bad happened and she moved away very quickly. I wonder if it was her cat which she had to leave and now he sort of takes care of it but not really it seems because he left for months not long ago too.

Is there any suggestion you have of how to make her more comfortable being in my house over the summer months so in winter time she can stay inside away from the cold nights? I don't know how to progress this without closing the back door which scares her a lot. She won't follow me to other rooms even with treats.

Thank you again!!

[SPerry]

Oh and her name is Ziggy... She doesn't have a collar so i thought i should make one up

[Kay]

it certainly sounds as if you are her main carer, though she may be getting bits and pieces from next door, or hunting mice and birds

I have been feeding a couple of cats for two years now, so have covered some of the problems you are facing - one is a full pedigree, a Tonkinese I think, and the other an intact male farm cat - I too would like to get the Tonkinese indoors as he/she has a pronounced squint which I think affects his eyesight, but although he will come inside my enclosed patio to eat he will not let me get within a couple of feet of him - and as my elderly female cat would react very badly it is probably best as it is - he sleeps most nights in a Mr Snugs kennel, with a self-heating pad, which in the colder months I add a liner too, and seems to be OK with this arrangement - but it doesn't get bitterly cold in my neck of the woods very often

in summer I plan to feed him only in the patio area and leave the gate to it, and the back door, open, and see if he ventures indoors - and leaving the door open whenever you can is probably your best bet too - outside cats usually panic at the thought of being shut in, but at the same time they are curious creatures and often can't resist exploring - the important thing is if she starts venturing further indoors, do not be tempted to shut the door on her - once she knows she can always escape she will relax, and also has the advantage of avoiding conflict with your neighbour

I don't know what your financial situation is, but is putting in a cat flap a possibility? When I first had my rescue cat Tosker he climbed out of my supposedly cat proof enclosure on his first night and took up residence in my neighbour's garage, and I gradually lured him closer and closer to the house when I fed him in the evening - and one day I heard the cat flap go while I was watching TV, and then I knew that without further effort on my part he would eventually come inside and stay there - it took three months to get to that stage but he never looked back

And I can't recommend the Mr Snugs kennels highly enough- they are indestructible in all weathers, and as long as they are not facing driving rain they stay bone dry - I move mine around according to the wind direction

good luck with Ziggy, and I await details of your progress (or not!) with great interest

[Ruth B]

I can't offer a lot of advise, but have you considered putting a paper collar on her with a message asking if she is a stray and a contact phone number. That way you could possibly talk to the the person you think might be the owner without admitting you lived so close and without him knowing just who you are.

I think the CPL page has advise on paper collars how to make them and what messages to use.