Cats weight

[Abbi Paquin]

Hi! This is my first time posting and I'm having a lot of difficulty with one of my cats.

Over the years he has gained so much weight. It kind of just happened really fast after we moved in with my husband four years ago. He is now 30lbs. I have gone to the vet every 6-8 months for checkups and weigh ins every couple months. He is on a diet and calorie approved by the vet (orijen grain free fit and trim). I have tried the prescription food but neither cat has done well on it, both like this one. I try to exercise/play with him for at least 10-20 minutes a day but all he does is either stare at me or swat with his arm. He doesn't move around, he is forced to climb the stairs but clearly looks like he has trouble, in the non winter times he has supervised time in the outside patio to wander around in. And yet he is not losing weight, he keeps gaining or staying in the 30lbs. He did recently get bloodwork done but I'm waiting on the results. He does have the start of arthritis. His fur gets super matted if I don't brush it every other day and I also have to clean his butt a few times a week.
Now he also hates hates hates my husband (my husband has done nothing. I think it's jealousy?), he has a lot of anxiety issues towards him and he isn't very fond of our one year great dane (the dane completely ignores him, like he knows not to go near him). They can be on the couch at the same time as long as my dog doesn't move. My cat is calm when it's just me and my other cat, he loves snuggles. He doesn't come down when my husband is home. He sits there across the room and will cry for hours even though he gets pets and snuggles. The moment I leave his attention he cries, he runs away at every little thing, he seems super stressed and miserable and I'm not sure what to do anymore. I'm at a complete loss.
I was told by someone that he could be better in a one pet/one person home with a more structured environment. I am gone a lot during the day because of work and then after taking my dog out but I do make sure to give him attention and love too along with my other cat. Maybe I don't give him as much attention as he craves or needs. As much as this breaks my heart I was wondering if finding him a different home where he is the only pet would be better for him or if there is anything I can do to help him more because what we've been doing isn't working and I feel so bad for the poor guy.

[Mollycat]

Poor pudding, are you sure you have that weight right?

I had some issues with my girl who got fat enough that she couldn't groom her back properly, she has a ton of psychological issues and I was also at my wits end. I also had another cat. I invested in two microchip feeders which not only stopped her eating his food, it also made her feel much more secure that nobody could eat hers and it would always be there for her. Then I bought a proper formula weight loss food, wet and dry, and in 8 weeks she had as promised lost a significant amount of weight.

But it sounds like there is a lot going on for this pudding. Sounds like he was already struggling to cope with the husband and the move, and with all respect to you perhaps the issues weren't noticed or addressed - I'm not judging, it's easy to kind of notice but not notice. But to then add a dog and of all things such a large gangly young bouncy dog, I can't help but feel sorry for the lad. Question is, do you want to take on the challenge of sorting this out and helping him through, or would you rather let him go and let someone else help him one to one?

[Abbi Paquin]

It is the correct weight as that is what the vet said. It ended up being 29.60lbs.

I had tried the specialty food but neither cat did well on it unfortunately. Both kept throwing up on two different brands even thought it was the slowest transition. I put my other cats food at a place where he can't reach it and also monitor while they eat so I know he's not eating anything else other than what I give him.

There is definitely some stuff going on for him and I did notice over the years. We moved in with my husband almost five years ago, we didn't move and then get a dog right away. I also trained my dog not to bother him, he plays with my other cat instead lol. But yeah I feel so bad for him. He's so sad and miserable looking.
I've been debating on surrendering him for weeks now but it hurts just thinking about not being able to see him again and what if he goes to a bad placement or something (I know rescues won't put them in a bad placement but what if no one wants him?) I've tried for years to help him. I just don't know how to anymore and it really truly breaks my heart because I do love him so much

[Abbi Paquin]

Poor pudding, are you sure you have that weight right?

I had some issues with my girl who got fat enough that she couldn't groom her back properly, she has a ton of psychological issues and I was also at my wits end. I also had another cat. I invested in two microchip feeders which not only stopped her eating his food, it also made her feel much more secure that nobody could eat hers and it would always be there for her. Then I bought a proper formula weight loss food, wet and dry, and in 8 weeks she had as promised lost a significant amount of weight.

But it sounds like there is a lot going on for this pudding. Sounds like he was already struggling to cope with the husband and the move, and with all respect to you perhaps the issues weren't noticed or addressed - I'm not judging, it's easy to kind of notice but not notice. But to then add a dog and of all things such a large gangly young bouncy dog, I can't help but feel sorry for the lad. Question is, do you want to take on the challenge of sorting this out and helping him through, or would you rather let him go and let someone else help him one to one?

Post Thu Feb 03, 2022 1:57 pm

It is the correct weight as that is what the vet said. It ended up being 29.60lbs.

I had tried the specialty food but neither cat did well on it unfortunately. Both kept throwing up on two different brands even thought it was the slowest transition. I put my other cats food at a place where he can't reach it and also monitor while they eat so I know he's not eating anything else other than what I give him.

There is definitely some stuff going on for him and I did notice over the years. We moved in with my husband almost five years ago, we didn't move and then get a dog right away. I also trained my dog not to bother him, he plays with my other cat instead lol. But yeah I feel so bad for him. He's so sad and miserable looking.
I've been debating on surrendering him for weeks now but it hurts just thinking about not being able to see him again and what if he goes to a bad placement or something (I know rescues won't put them in a bad placement but what if no one wants him?) I've tried for years to help him. I just don't know how to anymore and it really truly breaks my heart because I do love him so much

[Mollycat]

Very difficult situation. No I realise you didn't get the dog straight away because you said he was a year old, I'm only saying if you didn't realise just how upset he was already, the puppy might have been too much for him. But the situation might be resolvable, there are plenty of ideas and help on CatChat to help you - if you and your husband (both of you) are prepared to make changes to help him. On the other hand if you really feel too much has happened and it's in his best interests to go to someone else who can give him the time and easy environment he needs ... it's not about giving up on him or failing, it's about what's best for him, and if his environment can be made so that he can stay with his family, great. But what do you really want? It's very possible he could spend a while in a shelter, especially if he has health issues starting.

[Abbi Paquin]

Very difficult situation. No I realise you didn't get the dog straight away because you said he was a year old, I'm only saying if you didn't realise just how upset he was already, the puppy might have been too much for him. But the situation might be resolvable, there are plenty of ideas and help on CatChat to help you - if you and your husband (both of you) are prepared to make changes to help him. On the other hand if you really feel too much has happened and it's in his best interests to go to someone else who can give him the time and easy environment he needs ... it's not about giving up on him or failing, it's about what's best for him, and if his environment can be made so that he can stay with his family, great. But what do you really want? It's very possible he could spend a while in a shelter, especially if he has health issues starting.

I had honestly thought that with a slow enough introduction he'd be okay. And he they can definitely be in the same room together because Leo knows not to bug him. He just won't play with me or cuddle or anything unless he's alone.
As amazing as my husband is I don't think he'll actually put much effort into my cat as he doesn't care much for him. He tried and tried at first but after years he's given up and they just coexist together now.
I want to keep him but at the same time I don't know if or what the best decision is, we are trying for a baby as well now because we feel it's the best time but I don't know how he'd react to that or how he'd react to a whole new house with strangers if I surrendered him. Could.tjat make it worst? That's what my problem is.

[Mollycat]

I think you just answered your own question.

[Abbi Paquin]

I think you just answered your own question.

I guess I did. I'm just having a hard time accepting it. I want what's best for him and I want him to be healthy but how do I go about getting him to the right place?

[fjm]

I would start by contacting Maine Coon and Ragdoll rescues in your area, if there are any, or the breed clubs if there are not. They are more likely to know of a home suitable for a large cat with his particular needs. It sounds as if both his physical and emotional health are suffering at the moment, and the kind and loving thing is to find him a place where he can thrive.

[Abbi Paquin]

I would start by contacting Maine Coon and Ragdoll rescues in your area, if there are any, or the breed clubs if there are not. They are more likely to know of a home suitable for a large cat with his particular needs. It sounds as if both his physical and emotional health are suffering at the moment, and the kind and loving thing is to find him a place where he can thrive.

I'm so scared he won't go to a good home though. How do I figure out where the best place is? Will the rescues tell me when they've found a good home?

[fjm]

A good rescue has huge experience in vetting prospective owners and matching cats to homes - much safer than advertising or trying to find a place yourself. Most take the cat in, often into a foster home, to evaluate its needs and to sort out any health issues before rehoming - beginning to get his weight down, for example. Talking to them does not commit you to anything - contact them and ask about their vetting policies and whether they would keep you informed of his progress. Then decide if you are comfortable with what they suggest. But I would not put it off - 30lbs sounds significantly overweight even for a very large breed cat, and that cannot be good for his health, plus he does not sound happy.