cat agression after cats son dissapeared and returned

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jay78
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cat agression after cats son dissapeared and returned

Post by jay78 »

hi am just a new user here but looking for advice..
i have a 3 year old female cat (PHEEBY) who had her first litter of kittens 10 months ago,
we gave them all away to great homes but kept one,
now the one we kept (CHARLIE) is the most gorgeous friendliest softest cat Ive ever known , he never growled until the past few hours , him and his mammy cat were very close , as well as being very close to my jack Russell dog. She also was a very friendly loving cat too.

Anyways on Thursday morning 20th march charlie escaped, and got out for the very first time we of course did everything to alert people he was missing as we were ill with worry. he did thankfully return this Sunday morning at 5am, which myself and partner and teen kids were so relieved,

the problem now is that mother cat pheeby has reacted bad to him being home shes had a fight with him straight away , she has had a fight with our dog straight away , so we did our best and calmed them , separated them and fed charlie and went to bed at 6.30 am as we were shattered..

next day Sunday we thought okay after having all 3 animals separated through our sleep we would re introduce and let them see each other , so my partner held charlie, and pheeby jumped up and attacked him they were like one ball of cat ..very scary.
sorry my story is long but want to give all details,
so after the fight we decided to put pheeby in her cat basket to calm down ,and let her and her son become acquainted with each other , she hissed and growled and wasn't having any of it..
we swapped them over so not just pheeby was in the basket, we put charlie in to keep him safe and to also let him rest. still she wasn't happy we swapped there blankets and a jacket charlie had been wrapped in before he went away to give each other the old scent. still nothing she has went wild with our dog and got into a fight with him again, she as attacked my daughter as she tried to help stop the fight, so all 3 have to be separate,,she did calm down and lie next to charlie as he was in the basket , my partner was stroking her to make her feel safe , i moved and spoke to her and she growled and hissed at me and looked like she wanted to eat me, wasn't far wrong out of the blue she latched on to my partners arm sunk her teeth in and wouldn't let go , his arm is in a bad way, this terrified me and the kids and also my partner , so instead we have decided to put her in a separate room as we don't know what else to do , as well of actually being scared of her she has never acted like this ever before and charlie cat has never growled ever until today he wouldn't hurt her but she isn't having anything to do with him or our dog, as well as attacking my kids and partner...we love them all dearly but after 21 hours things aren't any better shes in the dining room crying to be out but too scared to let her out in case she attacks anyone or the dog or cat:( any advice would be greatly appreciated x
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Willowgill
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Re: cat agression after cats son dissapeared and returned

Post by Willowgill »

Hello Jay

What an awful situation - you would have thought it would be Charlie who may have the problems having been out. Has he been neutered? I'm just wondering if he's now sexually active at 10 months and been with a female on heat during his escapade? This might account for Pheeby's aggressive behaviour as she will be able to smell the other cat on him. If this isn't the case then I'm rather at a loss. For such an extreme reaction to not only her son but also the rest of her 'family' something has obviously upset her and she's probably now pretty stressed out. Is it possible something else happened at the same time totally unrelated - could she have been bitten and maybe have an abscess you're not seen (I only ask as this happened to us once and it was only a visit to the vet where they found it which explained his aggression as he was in such pain). It sounds as though you're doing all the right things keeping them separated - maybe try some Fellaway to help calm her down. If the problem persists I would try to get her to the vets for a check up to rule out anything medically wrong. Good luck!
jay78
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Re: cat agression after cats son dissapeared and returned

Post by jay78 »

Hi ..thanks for the reply.
No charlie hasn't yet been neutered , he is tho due to be booked in, when he came back he was very difrent very scared and we thought he has been lost , rather than being in a new home due to his new nervousness, maybe it could be he's been with another female and pheeby is reacting to this, right now we have dog seperate, charlie in his basket and pheeby is free, she keeps miowing out loud and keeps checking his basket, I've played some sounds of charlie on video to hopefully refresh her that he is the cat she was once close too.. But were all very nervous and scared around her...guess it is gonna take time for them all to calm and again be friends. Will also try get her checked with the vets to see if she has become hurt ...thank you
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Lyn from Australia
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Re: cat agression after cats son dissapeared and returned

Post by Lyn from Australia »

Has the situation calmed down Jay? Poor cats. The "scared" Charlie would be a cat that Pheeby doesn't recognise, plus any strange smells wouldn't help. His trip to the vet to be neutered won't help anything, as there's often aggression when you bring a cat come from the vet. But of course get that done because eventually everyone will benefit. I hope all is resolved very soon, if not already.
jay78
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Re: cat agression after cats son dissapeared and returned

Post by jay78 »

Hi yes things have improved,,monday night we tried and tried to get them close..( One in basket one out and swapping over) I kept putting them close to smell each other, pheeby was fine and licked his paw, so we tried them one in a room one outside te room ( charlie was out but held near the door) pheeby was hissing and trying to get him charlie also growling. . So we tried holding them and moving them close , pheeby was fine , at first but as soon as she was trusted very close shed lick his chest then try to bite and go for him, so that ended with them being separated for bed , pheeby with us and charlie with my daughter, she was running around trying to find his cries. Anyways sorry for the long story again,,, tuesday morning my partner said am not messing about today so he opened daughters bedroom door and pheeby ran in and went straight under the bed and sniffed him..he did that for a good half hour and everytime charlie came out she chased him back, any time the dog got excited she chased him, eventually we got all 3 together and they settled, she does seem very clingy with him and if we pick him up she looks like she wants to either get him or us. Partner said it seems like she's being protective of him, she still licks and tries to bite him but overall 100 percent better...will be waiting a while to get charlie neutered as don't want to risk her fighting with him so soon after having it done, want to let them settle a bit more , but I'm so pleased that there not being seperated so much she was angry at feed time yesterday but were working on that :)
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Willowgill
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Re: cat agression after cats son dissapeared and returned

Post by Willowgill »

Pleased to hear things are calming down a bit - sometimes it just takes time to get back to normal - sometimes it doesn't happen unfortunately and they end up just keeping out of each others way as two of mine do.
jay78
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Re: cat agression after cats son dissapeared and returned

Post by jay78 »

i am so pleased they have, she is still a bit weird with him, he makes a noise shes straight there looking to see whats wrong or if he comes to us or we pet him shes there straight away nosing,not sure if shes been very protective of him or us, she follows him everywhere too, im still a bit unsure as Ive never seen her so angry and bad tempered, scared me when she bit my partner bad, it shocked and scared him also. but for now there a lot more settled thank you all for the words and advice x
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Jacks
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Re: cat agression after cats son dissapeared and returned

Post by Jacks »

Jay I think you've handled this in a very positive and patient way! It seems to me this unneutered boy escaped because he smelled a female in heat and will have come back smelling very different. I'm guessing too that your girl isn't spayed? If she comes in to heat you will have more little kittens to deal with and an issue with inbreeding. If she is spayed now that's great - but smell to a cat is a very important marker and indicator and if he had been mating he would not have smelled like the cat she remembered.

Male neutering is a simple and minor surgery - get him done soonest.
jay78
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Re: cat agression after cats son dissapeared and returned

Post by jay78 »

Hi...pheeby cat is done...as defo didn't want anymore kittens, we were so luckt that the first litter she had went to very nice familys who we still keep in contact with, I guess she did smell the difrent smells on him and didn't recognise him as the cat she new, I heard that if you give kittens away and later try to return them to mam she would reject them, maybe this is why she was behaving as bad as she did, after all of this she seems very cling towards charlie and follows him everywhere. Really pleased as couldn't and wouldn't part with any of them :)
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