Reasonably shy or should I be worried?

[sheluvedit]

I recently (2 months ago) adopted 2 cats from the local rescue group. On the advice of the people at the shelter, I set up a safe space in my bathroom with a litter box, food, water, beds, toys, and scratching posts. I visited them once every 30 minutes in the first day, only giving them affection when they approached my hand and just read for a couple minutes otherwise. After about a week of this, one of them (Midnight) started pawing at the door and would meow loudly whenever he heard me outside the door. Seeing this as a good sign, i started slowly opening more of the house, but the other cat (Bam) has not really progressed past the first room yet. I got a cat tree last week, and he will now sometimes sit on the middle side while i am asleep but if i move an inch or look at him, he immediately darts back to the bathtub. Did i not give him enough time of the door being closed on the bathroom? I wanted to give him as much time as he needs with the door closed, but since him and Midnight were a bonded pair, i wanted to make sure they always had access to each other, and it was clear that Midnight wanted to explore the apartment as quickly as possible. Is Bam's behavior normal after 2 months? I have had a feliway diffuser going since about a week in.

[Janey]

Hi and welcome. Most of the foster cats we had when we fostered were traumatised for some reason or another and initially hid in a corner, but we kept picking them up gently and popping them on our knees every so often to cuddle them. I would get down on the cat’s level and try coaxing the cat out gently and talking to him softly and matter of fact i.e. have a chat, if that makes sense so he doesn’t pick up on any stress you may have at his reluctance to come out and starts to gain confidence. I would also try tempting him out with the odd treat - which you know he likes. Sometimes it took both of us to get the cats out from hiding, then one of us would sit them on our knee and stroke them softly, then let the cat get off the knee when they wanted to but keep doing that on and off so the cat learns it’s actually ok. I think they start to think, actually it’s quite nice this! This worked very well and within a day or two they were absolutely fine, have you tried doing that? Some people say leave them to come out of their own accord but we have never done that, sometimes cats will just continue to hide away. We do have a very quiet house though and we had no other pets and I am sure that helped. The lady at the rescue agreed with us, she said she rehomed a cat once and the owner literally lost it in the house it hid away that well. She went round to help her find it, I think she said it was hidden behind a washer or in the cellar or something, but once she got the cat out and forced gentle interaction the cat was fine. I think you have to go by what you feel and I also think that the more timid cat will gain confidence by watching you interacting with more confident one, I am sure that’s how I got the trust of my ferals by interacting with my own cats in front of them. Best of luck!

[Crewella]

I agree with Janey - I'll leave them be at first, but some cats do sometimes need a bit of help to understand that you're friend and not foe.

[Mayday21]

Hi Sheluvedit my Jezebel in same mode as Your Bam albeit it's 2 weeks today since I bought her home. In the afternoon or evening she'll lie on top of beds & I stroke & talk to her but in the mornings under the beds. I'm persevering but first time I've had a nervous Nellie or scardey cat. Fingers xd still that things get better. Vivian