stressed cat
stressed cat
I adopted a cute cat approx 2 years ago and she still hasn't settled. She seems scared a lot . I have to stand with her when she is eating and go outside with her if she needs the toilet when its dark. We recently moved and bought felway collars but the previous owners had cats and i think shes frightened of the smell of them. What can i do to make her settle its hard as i try so hard to make her feel loved
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Ruth B
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- Posts: 1998
- Joined: Wed Jun 15, 2016 11:31 am
- No. of cats in household: 3
- Location: Wolverhampton
Re: stressed cat
You say you recently moved, but make reference to her going outside to toilet, I assume that this was before you moved and you have been keeping her in for a while, or has it been several months since the the move and she is allowed out at the new house?
I have not come across the Felway collar but I can recomend the plug in Feliway diffuser, while not the full answer they can help.
It is sounding like she has become rather dependent on you for her security and she does need to learn that she is safe with out you around. What I would suggest is giving her a room of her own where she can learn to feel safe by herself, it does mean confining her for a while, but if she can accept that that room is a safe place it gives her somewhere to run to where she feels safe when she is let out to roam more.
Make sure she has all ammenaties in the room, food, water, litter tray, toys, etc, give her treats in there, play with her in there, fuss her in there. Make sure she knows that that is a happy safe place, give her some where comfy to hide if she wants to, and if she does hide leave her to come out in her own time don't try and coax her out or drag her out to tell her everything is alright, just leave her be, she will come out when she is ready. Try and have a routine for feeding her, same time each day, its surprising how well a cat can tell what time it is. If she will only eat with you there, then stay with her a while, after a few days or weeks, when she seems to realise that her room is safe, then leave her to eat by herself. Leaving dried food out so she can eat when she feels safe is also an option, just make sure you take it into account so she doesn't end up with twice as much food as she needs While no doubt she will sleep some of the time, she will hopefully spend time exploring, playing with the toys or just looking out the window when she is ready.
Once she is happy doing things alone in the one room slowly let her explore the rest of the house, room by room by herself. If she gets scared let her run back to her safe haven until she is ready to explore in her own time. Hopefully she will eventually be happy that the whole house is safe and be happy to be left alone. She might always be a bit nervy, some cats are, but it does mean she is less likely to venture far into the unknown when she does go out.
I have not come across the Felway collar but I can recomend the plug in Feliway diffuser, while not the full answer they can help.
It is sounding like she has become rather dependent on you for her security and she does need to learn that she is safe with out you around. What I would suggest is giving her a room of her own where she can learn to feel safe by herself, it does mean confining her for a while, but if she can accept that that room is a safe place it gives her somewhere to run to where she feels safe when she is let out to roam more.
Make sure she has all ammenaties in the room, food, water, litter tray, toys, etc, give her treats in there, play with her in there, fuss her in there. Make sure she knows that that is a happy safe place, give her some where comfy to hide if she wants to, and if she does hide leave her to come out in her own time don't try and coax her out or drag her out to tell her everything is alright, just leave her be, she will come out when she is ready. Try and have a routine for feeding her, same time each day, its surprising how well a cat can tell what time it is. If she will only eat with you there, then stay with her a while, after a few days or weeks, when she seems to realise that her room is safe, then leave her to eat by herself. Leaving dried food out so she can eat when she feels safe is also an option, just make sure you take it into account so she doesn't end up with twice as much food as she needs While no doubt she will sleep some of the time, she will hopefully spend time exploring, playing with the toys or just looking out the window when she is ready.
Once she is happy doing things alone in the one room slowly let her explore the rest of the house, room by room by herself. If she gets scared let her run back to her safe haven until she is ready to explore in her own time. Hopefully she will eventually be happy that the whole house is safe and be happy to be left alone. She might always be a bit nervy, some cats are, but it does mean she is less likely to venture far into the unknown when she does go out.
Re: stressed cat
Thank you for your help here . She does have her own room with everything in. If we leave her out of the room at night to sleep on our bed she wakes us up and runs around mad as a hatter so doesn't work well for us as my partner isnt as patient as me. Shes only allowed outside if we are in and cannot get out of the garden . I just get sad to think she may be unhappy maybe shes just unsociable. Do you think getting another cat would help ?
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Ruth B
- VIP Cat Chatter!
- Posts: 1998
- Joined: Wed Jun 15, 2016 11:31 am
- No. of cats in household: 3
- Location: Wolverhampton
Re: stressed cat
I would also say No to getting another cat. She needs to be confident in her home before introducing any other animal, otherwise she will get more stressed and possibly another cat will take advantage and bully her.
If letting her out at night is causing you and your partner issues then keep her in her room at night, it won't hurt her. Make sure you play with her a lot before you go to bed, and possibly leave her with one of your jumpers or other piece of clothing if you think she would settle better having something with your smell on it to cuddle into. She can then settle down for a bit and later chase balls or watch out the window when she wakes up. Let her out during the day when you are around, or if both of you are at work then let her have the run of the house if you think she is confident enough. They quickly adapt if the routine is kept to.
Remember if there is any stress between you and your partner, particularly is the cat is keeping you awake at night, she will pick it up, they are far more sensitive creatures than most give them credit for. While having them sleep on your bed with you might seem a wonderful idea, it isn't always the case, as, as you have found out, cats don't keep the same hours we do.
If letting her out at night is causing you and your partner issues then keep her in her room at night, it won't hurt her. Make sure you play with her a lot before you go to bed, and possibly leave her with one of your jumpers or other piece of clothing if you think she would settle better having something with your smell on it to cuddle into. She can then settle down for a bit and later chase balls or watch out the window when she wakes up. Let her out during the day when you are around, or if both of you are at work then let her have the run of the house if you think she is confident enough. They quickly adapt if the routine is kept to.
Remember if there is any stress between you and your partner, particularly is the cat is keeping you awake at night, she will pick it up, they are far more sensitive creatures than most give them credit for. While having them sleep on your bed with you might seem a wonderful idea, it isn't always the case, as, as you have found out, cats don't keep the same hours we do.