Cat Chat Feline Forum

We adopted Diabolo in November. He was incredibly timid and still is. He is better and lets us stroke him on his terms but is jumpy if we move etc. He is so noisy at night at the moment and when Gemo goes out goes mad and sits by the cat flap meowing until she comes in. He doesn't try and go out but think he may be getting bored indoors. I don't know when is safe to let him out ? He is still very timid but we can stroke him but is upsetting Gemo a little with his spooking and sitting by the cat flap. The refuge said to keep him in for a few months and is always nerve wracking letting them out for the first time, but we need to nip the meowing at night and in the morning in the bud.

Does he like his food? If we want Gracie to come in we just have to rattle a bowl of biscuits! Perhaps you could try letting him out just before mealtime. He shouldn't go far with a empty tummy. Good luck.

He knows food time butnit is whether he is happy with us. Also he is timid to our movements amd wasn't sure if henwould get spooked outdoors? I am not sure how protective we have to be before letting him out.

would he be quieter if Gemo were indoors? Just wondering if you confined both to the house at night - with Gemo having outdoor access during the day only, if that would help him be more settled? I'd probably be tempted to try keep him in until end Feb at least; purely because of the winter weather. if he does go missing at least March when it's a bit warmer he'd have a chance at catching things and survival.

But just thinking and on a slightly different note.... I've had my Henry for just over 3 years already and he's still very skittish at sudden noises and will run off in a blind panic. Maybe your Diabolo will always be the same kind of cat?

I've said it before and I'll say it again - he's so luck that he was adopted by you. Not many would have the love and patience for him x

Thanks meriad. I was thinking overnight about that as I think he would be better off with Gemo indoors too. He is quieter when she comes in yes and is settled during the day. Just as an add on, I think shutting Gemo in is not an option as we go on holiday in 7 weeks and shutting her in and having two litter trays for our cats with our neighbour coming in isn't great as she also has to manage chickens. I theory it sounds a plan but long term isn't helping the problem.

I agree with Ria, keep them both in at night (it's safer for the cats that way anyway, as well as helping the local wildlife). Hopefully they will both settle down at night then, without Diabolo feeling deprived when Gemo's out and he isn't. They'll probably make a fuss to start with, which will drive you mental, but persevere and they'll soon get used to the new rules.

And keep Diabolo in for a while longer until he's more settled with you. A few more weeks, or even months, of being indoors really isn't going to make a lot of difference when balanced against the years he will be spending coming and going as he pleases.

Our Zig sounds a lot like Diabolo, although he is now fine with us, but it takes very little new or unexpected event to make him run and hide, and it was a long slow process building his confidence to the point that we can let him out AND be confident about him coming back in. We have issues with our other cat Elsie not letting him back in when he's out, and he's VERY dim about using the cat flap, so we do have to shut them in when we go away. Luckily my neighbour is a cat lady too, and TBH cleaning out two trays twice a day is no big deal, takes a couple of minutes tops, particularly if you use a soft clumping litter like Cats Best. Keeping them in, in their own home, is much better than the alternatives - kennels or the worry about them getting stuck outside or scarpering if they're scared. The cats just quietly settle down for the duration and we've never found the house trashed on our return. They just get REALLY excited when we're home!

lilynmitz wrote:I agree with Ria, keep them both in at night (it's safer for the cats that way anyway, as well as helping the local wildlife). Hopefully they will both settle down at night then, without Diabolo feeling deprived when Gemo's out and he isn't. They'll probably make a fuss to start with, which will drive you mental, but persevere and they'll soon get used to the new rules.

And keep Diabolo in for a while longer until he's more settled with you. A few more weeks, or even months, of being indoors really isn't going to make a lot of difference when balanced against the years he will be spending coming and going as he pleases.

Our Zig sounds a lot like Diabolo, although he is now fine with us, but it takes very little new or unexpected event to make him run and hide, and it was a long slow process building his confidence to the point that we can let him out AND be confident about him coming back in. We have issues with our other cat Elsie not letting him back in when he's out, and he's VERY dim about using the cat flap, so we do have to shut them in when we go away. Luckily my neighbour is a cat lady too, and TBH cleaning out two trays twice a day is no big deal, takes a couple of minutes tops, particularly if you use a soft clumping litter like Cats Best. Keeping them in, in their own home, is much better than the alternatives - kennels or the worry about them getting stuck outside or scarpering if they're scared. The cats just quietly settle down for the duration and we've never found the house trashed on our return. They just get REALLY excited when we're home!

Thanks for your advice. Things have improved maginally. Gemo really does need to go out as she does feel a bit stressed sometimes with him as he can be a little overplayful and she doesn't know how to take it. I think you are right about keeping him indoors for now. I think shutting both of them in would be a recipe for disaster!
Our neighbour has chickens to look after too so just with Diabolo in is enough for her as far as litter trays go. She will need to care for the hens twice a day so need to keep it simple for them too.

I feel we are making huge steps wi Diabolo. However we are not brave enough to let him out. He knows the words tea time, we can stroke him now and he knows his name. We still cannot go up to him and stroke him but a minor problem. We are just not brave enough to let him out. Normally we have cats that are ready because they have arrived not so timid. The difference since he arrived is huge but am I being silly and how clever and sensible are they when they go out? The weather is so lovely atm.

Personally, I would wait and give him some more time to settle in too.

We let him out yesterday after a couple of weeks of uncertainty. He was fine. admittedly he was only out for 10-15 mins before his tea and was fine. He came back in for food but then as with all cats his persistant mewoing to go out again. We have this with all cats and was to be expected but it was excessive. He was OK all night but this morning has started again.The meowing is excessive and have figured out I think that it is a boredom thing or Gemo being out. Once I play with him he is OK until he realises he can sit at the cat flap again and look for Gemo at night when we are sleeping he seems fine. If she goes out he is constantly at every window looking for her and almost stalking her. At night he is quite quiet but as soon as I am up he starts again which then wakes the house up with his meowing. This is why I think it is a boredom/attention thing and wanting to go out. He also likes a good stroke and quietens down a lot and purrs like mad.

I was going to say he should be ok now but I don’t know Gemo personally and would have felt bad if he didn’t come back, although that would be unlikely after so long. Glad it went ok. Sounds like he’s a cat that likes to be able to go out, I have one like that and she’s moaning at the moment but I only let her out once the ferals have eaten and the birds have had a chance to get some food in about an hour! She potters in and out until about 1.30 then I keep her in so the ferals get some peace the rest of the day (she will chase the timid one and they were here before her). She actually comes in of her own accord now, has a bite of lunch and takes herself to bed lol

Thanks Janey. Gemo is his step sister . She is fine. Diabolo is the new arrival who has been indoors for 3 months. I am tearing my hair out. He went out for an hour this morning and came back in with food. However, whilst he knows his name indoors, he ignores me outdoors as he is too inquisitive. Having been out for an hour, he know is meowing again to go out. It is a vicious circle really. When he was out he had a massive bushtail and was obviously quite warey. I am not aure what to do as his meowing and wining is driving us mad.

emmab wrote:Thanks Janey. I am tearing my hair out. He went out for an hour this morning and came back in with food. However, whilst he knows his name indoors, he ignores me outdoors as he is too inquisitive. Having been out for an hour, he know is meowing again to go out. It is a vicious circle really. When he was out he had a massive bushtail and was obviously quite warey. I am not aure what to do as his meowing and wining is driving us mad.

What did he catch it?! I can imagine the moaning though. I wonder whether it’s because he’s not been out for so long? hopefully he will settle down once he knows he can go out more. My Tasha will do that though all morning, if she has to stay in for some reason. I think the problem with her, is that she was kept as an indoor cat, until she came to me. According the chip company, she’d been missing many times in her 6 years with previous owners, (when she first came here she’d been missing 6 months and only lived down the road!) they wouldn’t give me the ins and outs of course but “travelled well” as they put it She’s never left us, but we let her go out and she’s happy.

Janey wrote:

emmab wrote:Thanks Janey. I am tearing my hair out. He went out for an hour this morning and came back in with food. However, whilst he knows his name indoors, he ignores me outdoors as he is too inquisitive. Having been out for an hour, he know is meowing again to go out. It is a vicious circle really. When he was out he had a massive bushtail and was obviously quite warey. I am not aure what to do as his meowing and wining is driving us mad.

What did he catch it?! I can imagine the moaning though. I wonder whether it’s because he’s not been out for so long? hopefully he will settle down once he knows he can go out more. My Tasha will do that though all morning, if she has to stay in for some reason. I think the problem with her, is that she was kept as an indoor cat, until she came to me. According the chip company, she’d been missing many times in her 6 years with previous owners, (when she first came here she’d been missing 6 months and only lived down the road!) they wouldn’t give me the ins and outs of course but “travelled well” as they put it She’s never left us, but we let her go out and she’s happy.

Ha ha no, that would be quick work! No I enticed him back with food. Problem is, once they go out they totally ignore anything as they are so inquisitive! I will let him out again but will try and get him to use the cat flap this time as it is impossible to watch him the whole time. His meowing could drive me to drink and with a hubbie in bed working shifts, it isn't funny!

He has gone back out this afternoon and did return! However the meowing because he wants to go out is quite excessive. It will sort itself out when he goes out all the time but shutting him in near dark etc is awful. Tomorrow will rain so will keep him in and we are away Friday Saturday and the same again, but he is too noisy in the mornings whilst hubbie is sleeping and evenings when we are trying to relax. Any suggestions gratefully received. I do stroke him and he is quiet and when he plays he is temporarily quiet but really need help with the noise. I daren't move or go outside as if he does flake out for 5 mins he then starts up again when I move. He so badly wants to go out and will do but cannot rush it and small wanders need to be done. Help!

You could try distracting him with play last thing at night. A lot of cats have a mad half hour before bed, but because he's used to entertaining himself outside, he hasn't learnt that he can get his stimulation inside. So get lots of interactive toys, e.g. da Bird, feathers on sticks, things on string, catnip bags ("Yeoww" products are good), anything till you find out what he likes, and give him something else to enjoy in the late evening. Cats often go off toys after a while, so keep reinventing stuff, or trying new stuff.

Other things that can set off bad behaviour is if they're desperate to use the loo and would rather do it outside (some cats are just like that). As a compromise, make sure his tray is always clean, in a private place, and a soft litter that's easy for them to dig in.

Hunger will also do it - it took us a while to realise why Zig was being so badly behaved, their food bowl was empty! Make sure there's always a bit of food down. Dried food keeps better overnight. A well fed cat will sleep better than a hungry one.

He is fine overnight, has food all night, litter tray is cleaned last thing at night and first thing in the morning. It is a going out thing as he sees Gemo going out and pines to go out himself. Once he is out he is fine, or if we stroke him or play with him but we cannot play with him all the time.
Yesterday he was outside and then later came in and used the litter tray, and has been using one for a few months so that should not be a problem. I know if he had 24hr access outside he would be fine.
I have read that giving in and letting them out for short periods during the day will make them more noisy and persistant. For the past 3 weeks he has been quite vocal when Gemo goes out and he follows her around each window to see where she is. He obviously wants to go out. It's the half in half out issue atm. He knows he can go out now but not all the time and that is what is making him very vocal.

I wish someone would bring back the cat flaps with a sliding solid panel to close it off - cats could instantly see that they couldn't get through it, and so did not spend ages trying to open a closed flap, which had been open earlier - nor could they see the outside through it

and of course that sort of flap stopped a stranger cat getting in

Kay wrote:I wish someone would bring back the cat flaps with a sliding solid panel to close it off - cats could instantly see that they couldn't get through it, and so did not spend ages trying to open a closed flap, which had been open earlier - nor could they see the outside through it

and of course that sort of flap stopped a stranger cat getting in

I know what you mean but he still meows. I have let him out today and he is using the cat flap. Peace and harmony restored.

Kay wrote:I wish someone would bring back the cat flaps with a sliding solid panel to close it off - cats could instantly see that they couldn't get through it,

I'd never even heard of that, but it sounds like a great idea. When my young cat had to be kept in for 4 days after being spayed, I taped a piece of cardboard over the flap. I wouldn't dare just lock a clear flap - she's used to charging through at full gallop, and she'd injure herself and/or break the flap. But messing about with tape and cardboard is a faff. A moveable panel would be much better.

MarySkater wrote:

Kay wrote:I wish someone would bring back the cat flaps with a sliding solid panel to close it off - cats could instantly see that they couldn't get through it,

I'd never even heard of that, but it sounds like a great idea. When my young cat had to be kept in for 4 days after being spayed, I taped a piece of cardboard over the flap. I wouldn't dare just lock a clear flap - she's used to charging through at full gallop, and she'd injure herself and/or break the flap. But messing about with tape and cardboard is a faff. A moveable panel would be much better.

Our in laws just made a screw on wood plate to their door. It was neatly done as Dad was a technical illustrator so was a work of art. Also stops drafts too. It was just screwed on with large wingnut thingies and worked a treat.

my mother had one - it had a slot at the top and bottom of the frame, and the cover just slid down - really simple and much easier for her to manage than those sliding buttons which I often struggle to move, and which break off too easily

Does Diabolo now have 24/7 outdoor access or still confined to daytime only? Well done him and you for how far he has gotten; so pleased for you all

MarySkater wrote:she's used to charging through at full gallop, and she'd injure herself and/or break the flap.

My Ava is exactly the same - nothing elegant about her at all when she comes barrelling through that flap;

meriad wrote:Does Diabolo now have 24/7 outdoor access or still confined to daytime only? Well done him and you for how far he has gotten; so pleased for you all

He has gone out all day today but he struggles with the click of the cat flap. He has been trying to go out just now and given up and gone to bed! We are helping him a little. He comes in OK. He can go out at night as we are safe from roads etc but will let him figure out the cat flap on his own. If he is desperate to go out I am sure he will figure it out. He has a litter tray indoors so all good.

I bet he’s enjoying going out and he’s coming home, that’s great. Hopefully he will settle down more now, and get the hang of the flap.

emmab wrote:He has gone out all day today but he struggles with the click of the cat flap. He has been trying to go out just now and given up and gone to bed! We are helping him a little. He comes in OK. He can go out at night as we are safe from roads etc but will let him figure out the cat flap on his own. If he is desperate to go out I am sure he will figure it out. He has a litter tray indoors so all good.

that's the perfect way round - excellent news .

Years back one of mine (sadly no longer with me ) soon figured out how to get outside but struggled with the getting back in bit.. that was a bit of a worry but thankfully it was only a few weeks longer for that.

Thanks all for your experiences. I cannot get him to use the catflap properly yet. He doesn't like the click of the microchip. He has used it once when he got spooked and legged it in but just cannot seem to grasp the concept. I do hold him at the cat flap, use treats etc but he waits for me to open the door. During the night he refused to use it and waited during the night for me to get up and let him in.

Emma, could you during the day time prop the cat flap open so he doesn't have to push through it; the click will still activate but he hopefully will soon get used to the sound if he doesn't have to linger by it too long?

Just a thought

My hubbie did that yesterday so may try it again. He goes through it propped open but when it is shut sees it as a "no entry" if you like. Yet the other day he was so desperate to go out and it was locked but was trying to use it by pushing it so cannot win. Thanks for the idea.