Clingy cat

[rhia1989]

Hi All,

I have two cats, one is 2 years old and the other is 5 years old. I've had the 2 year old since he was about 5 months, and he's a little superstar. He's adventurous, independent but also loves a good cuddle in the evening and will play with anyone who offers!

I am worried about my 5 year old, though. I've only had him since November, as my previous cat died and my other cat really need a friend. He's an absolute sweetie, but lacks in confidence and is very clingy. He gets on well with my other cat - they'll play together and curl up together, but whenever I'm around he just wants to be with me. He was a rescue cat, his previous family having had 5 other cats, 2 dogs, 4 children and they just abandoned him when they moved house, so I am assuming he didn't get an awful lot of attention or affection before I rescued him. He's a big softie, but I am concerned that he may be too clingy. As soon as I sit down, he jumps up and wants to curl up on my lap, even if I'm eating dinner. If I'm in bed at night, he'll either jump up on the bed to join me (which is usually fine), or he'll sit by my bed and almost wail for attention. He'll wait outside the bathroom if I go to get a shower. When I first got him home, he spent a lot of time in the first couple of weeks under my duvet covers, and it took him a month before he ventured downstairs!

Both of the cats could go outside - there's a cat flap and my other cat happily comes and goes as he pleases! But my 5 year old won't go through the cat flap at all. He's not scared of it as such as he goes over and investigates when my other cat comes through but he won't use it, so won't go out at night. When he has been outside, he followed my other cat in the garden next door but then got himself worked up because he couldn't seem to get back over!

I appreciate he may be very clingy as this is probably his first ever home where he's ever had any attention and feels safe and secure, but is there anything anyone can suggest to help, or suggest how I could get him to go through the cat flap (he doesn't like treats, apparently!). The cat flap issue is complicated slightly by the fact it goes through the wall, so there's a small tunnel for him to go through first!

Thanks,
Rhiannon

[Lilith]

Aww bless him, the treasure!

Eventually he'll learn to stand on his own four paws, but at the moment I feel he's still luxuriating in a proper home after a horrible one, and enjoying every minute of it.

I once had a boy a bit like him - he was a feral tom and I thought he'd never speak to me again after I had him neutered, but not a bit of it. I'll never forget the loud purrs when he discovered the bed. That guy never left my side; he even sat on the edge of the bath when I was in it and perved at me.

A friend remarked - 'that cat must think he's died and gone to heaven', and I think your lad must feel the same.

Give him time; he'll get more adventurous, especially with spring and summer coming on, but personally, at present, I'd just enjoy seeing him enjoying himself - please give him a fuss from me

[rhia1989]

Ha yes, Aslan will also quite happily sit by the bathtub if I'm taking a bath! My other cat, Scampi, also does that but then gets bored and wanders off!

Thank you - I know its because he's enjoying his new home and all the fuss and company he gets (he does get a lot of fuss!), but I just don't want him to miss out on exploring the rest of the world. He is getting far more confident - he used to be scared of meeting anyone new, but now he realises that new people means more fuss, so he's quite content to meet them!

I hope his confidence will continue to grow (and he'll start using the cat flap!) and he's happy.

[nanny pamy]

Awww sounds just like my cat Theo. Hes not a bit interested in going outside. To be honest I'm glad. Its not too safe around here for cats. As long as hes having lots of play time he should be happy.

[Kay]

in a few more weeks you'll be able to sit outside and leave the door open - that should persuade him to venture out, even if only to get on your lap again!

but then you'll be able to keep an eye on him too - what's the betting you'll soon be posting that you never see him these days!!