Help with newly adopted stray - meowing issue

[ClassyCat01]

Last Monday (July 16) we managed to catch a stray cat that had been lurking around outside our apartment building. He appeared to be in bad shape due to his small size and horribly matted coat, and we wanted to get him some help. Took him to the emergency vet and he was said to be a young adult un-neutered male, only 6 pounds and severely dehydrated. At another vet appointment on Thursday (July 19), he was neutered, groomed, and given the usual round of shots. Now he's home with us.

I know it's pretty early in the game since we only got him a week ago, but we're really having trouble dealing with some of his behaviors. The main issue is his frequent, incessant meowing. He will sit there and yowl seemingly without cause for 10-20 minutes or more at a time, and it's extremely ear-splitting and frankly aggravating. We don't know if this is due to his former tomcat state and the fact that he still has plenty of testosterone in his system, or something else.

I suppose the "something else" could also be something along the lines of separation anxiety? We have no way of knowing if he's always lived outside or if he was abandoned here by previous owners. I'm inclined to say the latter because he enjoys being pet and has obviously been around people before. But if we put him in the bathroom to eat (we have to due to our other cat), he will cry at the door nonstop for at least 20 minutes, and sometimes aggressively claw at it.

It's also extremely hard to interact with him. He CRAVES attention to the point where he's desperately aggressive. He will rub on you nonstop, and if you begin petting him, he will begin a fit of meowing and follow you everywhere wanting more, and crying if you don't give it to him. It's hard to even get up from my seat and go do something, because he will follow me and scream at me while I do whatever I'm doing. I want to give him attention so he knows he can rely on us for such a thing, but I don't know how to give it to him if it always results in his horrible yowling. I feel bad just having to ignore him.

He does the same thing especially when we're trying to cook food - stands in the kitchen and endlessly yowls no matter what we're cooking (he just did it to me when I got some cereal). I suppose this may be attributable to his formerly starving state, but of course we're giving him plenty of food now since we need him to gain weight and don't want him to feel like he has to ration.

He and my other cat are doing okay together so far. My cat just hisses at him if he gets too close, and that's about it. They don't purposefully antagonize one another, and they are able to sit a few feet apart and watch birds without getting into a fight.

Any thoughts on the meowing issue? Like I said I know it's only been a week, but it's become so stressful to not be able to do ANYTHING without having him scream at us. We can't relax because we have to constantly worry if our next action will set him off. We have to wonder if we can fix food because he'll have a meowing fit over it. We live in an apartment and so we really don't have anywhere to go that provides any sort of meaningful separation. I want things to work out and I hate the thought of having to rehome him again.

[Lilith]

Hi and welcome and good on you for taking in this guy.

I feel at the moment he's bewildered, in spite of getting himself a good home, and clearly settling in very well with your first cat.

I realise the mewing can drive you round the bend; I have a 17 year old 'mewsance' (herself a rescued feral and now doing feline dementia howling and forgetting she's eaten, though she's nagged me all her life lol if she's seen I'm busy.)

What works for me is to talk, never shut them away or ignore them, but talk back. I know this can sound ridiculous; you don't need to get intellectual, but they do like being talked to. He will still be feeling very insecure, around company and food. A feral lad once moved in with me, and he'd eat till he burst (or puked.) It's a very primitive instinct, like a big cat gorging on its kill in case it might not kill again for a while.

Sounds to me as if you've made a good beginning with him, and in time he will settle down. I'd advise constant reassurance and fuss and telling him he's a good boy. Well, as I say, that's what's worked for me.

Mind you I often have a conversation with my youngest cat - 'have you been a good girl?' She gives me a look and says, 'Naow!'

All the very best with him, hope this helps for now and hopefully others will be along with more advice. Good luck and please let us know how you go on

[Kay]

just on the off chance, you are sure, aren't you, that he can hear properly - because deaf cats tend to be very loud because they can't hear themselves

my old girl makes a dreadful racket at times, for no apparent reason, and I howl back at her, which doesn't shut her up entirely, but does turn the howls into cat chat, which is much more bearable

[ClassyCat01]

I just wanted to say thank you for the advice given here. We told ourselves we would be more patient to see if he settles in, and he's doing much better now. He doesn't yowl anymore (the deafening kind, anyway), and he mostly relaxes in the living area throughout the day now. We ended up buying a feline diffuser and I'm not sure if it's helping, but at the very least it's not hurting things.

And actually, I initially wondered if the new kitty had hearing issues as well because of his frequent meowing. But we've done our own tests and he certainly does respond to more quiet sounds. So I think the yowling was a case of 1. his tomcat state, 2. generally being talkative.

The relationship between new kitty (Edgar) and my old kitty (Toki) hasn't changed much so far. They'll occasionally run into one another, one of them will hiss, and the other will walk away. That's about the extent of their interaction. A couple times recently, Edgar has raised a paw to hit Toki, though Toki ended up leaving before any sort of fight occurred. I'm hoping that's not an indication of their relationship worsening, since I'd really like them to just get along.