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Cat noisy since it's companion died

Posted: Sat Jan 19, 2019 9:35 am
by Blue Wind
Prior to her daughter suddenly dying of illness, Whitby, who is now fourteen was very quiet and easy to manage. Almost immediately her behaviour changed, she only made a noise if she went in the carrier, now she is yowling, especially in the night. She comes into the bedrooms several times in the night/early morning, she interferes with things, mobile phones, spectacles, people etc and jumps about yowling loudly. Our sleep is being affected it. She is otherwise extremely well for an older cat, she is eating well, lively and able to jump, there is no evidence of feline dementia.
We have wanted to get a young cat or kitten but the home checks (which we have passed) and the embargo over Christmas have slowed things up. Do members consider a new kitten will help? The person at the cat sanctuary thought so. What we can do in the meantime the noise is driving us both mad.

Re: Cat noisy since it's companion died

Posted: Sat Jan 19, 2019 6:52 pm
by Janey
Aww my heart goes out to her as it sounds like she's grieving, so sad :( I would consider a companion I think. We’ve never lost relative cats, but we have lost companion cats. I’ve never actually had a cat suffer like this and I really do feel for her. I’m not sure a kitten would be the best thing as we’ve always had older cats so when one oldie has gone we’ve adopted another in the past. Hopefully someone else will be along who can advise on adopting a younger cat. Meanwhile, please give your little puss a cuddle from me and I hope things settle down soon xx

Re: Cat noisy since it's companion died

Posted: Sat Jan 19, 2019 9:02 pm
by fjm
Poor Whitby, and poor you. I think that before going ahead with finding her a companion I would get her checked by your vet, just to be sure there isn't anything physical going on. Hyperthyroidism is very common in older cats, and can show itself in the sort of demanding behaviour you describe.

When Pippin's brother vanished when they were both about 9 months old he was bereft. Like you, I had to wait for Christmas to pass, but was fortunate enough to find Tilly immediately after, and they got on together immediately, perhaps because they were both so young and both missing siblings. As Whitby has had at least one litter she may take to a kitten more easily than to another adult - less threatening and easier to dominate!

Re: Cat noisy since it's companion died

Posted: Sun Jan 20, 2019 8:09 am
by Blue Wind
I don't think there is a problem with her thyroid as she had a lot of blood tests not so long ago and this was one of the conditions that was checked. The crying and clinging happened immediately Ruby died after Whitby saw her, the rest of the night she pressed herself on the pillow next to me.
We have had cats previously, a sibling lost his sister and although he was clingy and liked to go on knees, he didn't do all this crying. It is odd because the two cats didn't seem very close, they hissed at each other at times, they never cuddled up together or miaowed to each other, it seems that cats must have strong non verbal communication.
I sense that she will be better with a kitten as she is rather territorial with older cats in the garden but is more friendly with the kittens that have visited our house and garden.

Re: Cat noisy since it's companion died

Posted: Sun Jan 20, 2019 8:25 am
by booktigger
I have been in this situation, it is so heartbreaking. I think another cat will help (it did in my situation), but not sure about a single kitten, you may find that if they might be too much for a fourteen year old, so I'd go for slightly older when they are a bit calmer.

Re: Cat noisy since it's companion died

Posted: Sun Jan 20, 2019 9:20 am
by Ruth B
The first cats I adopted as an adult (the family had always had cats and I knew once i had a place of my own I would get some) were a mother, Katie, and daughter, Patch, pair. They were very close and while not entirely dependent on her, Patch always took her lead from Katie. When Katie had to be put to sleep Patch became distraught, howling around the house, it was heart breaking. It was also the 4th of Jan and all the rescues were shut. Fortunately my Mother volunteered at at a rescue and just before Christmas they had had a Ragdoll cat handed in and were wondering just what to do about rehoming a pedigree, they didn't want someone to have him just because it was a cheap way of getting a pedigree, so when I said I needed to get another cat and soon, so we got Blue.

Even during the time when they had to be kept apart it helped, Patch knew there was another cat in the house and was interested, she even managed to let him out of the lounge one night (she was a tortie,) and we got up in the morning and found him AWOL, fortunately standing on the back step shouting his name and rattling a box of crunchies brought him home. They soon became fast friends and frequently were found curled up together on the bed. Fortunately Blue, living up to the reputation of Ragdolls, was very laid back and loved company, both human and feline.

At the other end of the spectrum is what happened when Blue died leaving Tiggy alone. Tiggy showed all the signs of missing him, calling around the house at night and searching for him, even though they hadn't been as close as he and Patch were. So I got the juniors, hoping that getting two youngsters together might mean they played together and left her in peace. It didn't work quite as planned. Saturn is an over confident lad who will happily tease anyone, he isn't violently aggressive and has never drawn blood, but he will chase both the girls and plays rather rougher than either want. Freyja on the other hand was lacking in any self confidence and while at the shelter had attached herself to Saturn, when she came here she quickly changed to following Tiggy around, if Tiggy said something was safe then Freyja would investigate too. They were 6 months when I got them so maybe i would have been better getting true kittens, but at the time both i and my husband were working full time and didn't feel it was fair to have kittens and then leave them most of the day and night shut in one room.

Hindsight is always wonderful, and I have made a mistake or two, but i have always found that introducing a second cat after losing one has helped. I will also add that mine have never been allowed in the bedroom at night so that might have something to do with the night time calling and searching.

Re: Cat noisy since it's companion died

Posted: Wed Jan 30, 2019 10:42 am
by Catfan5
We have a cat in the same position too. His brother was put to sleep last August and he still misses him. We have four other cats but the little brothers were a pair and Harry yowls and waits for Alfie to come and play with a particular toy they both loved. He too has become very vocal like yours and is feisty with the other cats as well where he used to be quiet. I bought new toys, catnip ones and played more with him which worked for a while but as soon as I ease off he starts yelling again.

Re: Cat noisy since it's companion died

Posted: Wed Jan 30, 2019 3:26 pm
by issiandarchie+68
Blue Wind wrote: Sun Jan 20, 2019 8:09 am I don't think there is a problem with her thyroid as she had a lot of blood tests not so long ago and this was one of the conditions that was checked. The crying and clinging happened immediately Ruby died after Whitby saw her, the rest of the night she pressed herself on the pillow next to me.
We have had cats previously, a sibling lost his sister and although he was clingy and liked to go on knees, he didn't do all this crying. It is odd because the two cats didn't seem very close, they hissed at each other at times, they never cuddled up together or miaowed to each other, it seems that cats must have strong non verbal communication.
I sense that she will be better with a kitten as she is rather territorial with older cats in the garden but is more friendly with the kittens that have visited our house and garden.
'They hissed a each other at times '..I think there is your answer. I don't believe cats 'miss' each other, I think that is a human emotion but respect other forum members personal experiences. In a household with more than one cat, there is a definite hierarchy. They might rub along quite amicably, so much so that we barely notice. But in my experience, when the dominant cat leaves, it's scent remains in the house for quite a while. The next cat down the line can smell but not see the departed pet .. so.. it will invariably go around the house yelling hello? hello? are you gone? Am I safe moving up to top cat? This happens especially at night time for a while but it will pass, as will the novelty of letting loose all the previously supressed emotions. 'Look at me! I'm in charge, come and play'! Some older cats, and I have experienced this, will also, as you describe, become clingy for a time. This is simply seeking extra security, younger cats feel more confident. As for obtaining a kitten, well, my friend adopted one and it drove her elderly cat crazy. It constantly, as kittens do, wanted to play, pounced on her existing cat when she was trying to rest, gobbled up her food etc. It's a very personal decision, but maybe your pet is beginning to relax into being an only? I wouldn't worry though, your cat is simply being a cat, I'm sure everything will settle down soon.

Issi

Re: Cat noisy since it's companion died

Posted: Sat Mar 09, 2019 6:17 pm
by buckspiccy
We have just experienced this-our remaining cat -13- is still grieving after we lost our 10 yr old Burmese x in tragic circumstances-we think he was poisoned, in November-and she -usually a very quiet cat who hardly ever miaowed, but was the dominant cat, now yowls at night, so much so we are leaving lights on for her and trying to reassure her. so following advice we got 2 older rescue cats 10+13 but they are now problems in themselves, not taking to a new house, staying put in their bonding room, not knowing what toys are for, etc, so maybe a kitten would be best- I do know that my vet daughter has a kitten with two erstwhile feral cats and it has helped them to relax and start playing, and they love watching her and tolerate her antics well. A kitten would probably not be such a threat as an older cat, but that's too late for us now! So go ahead, I would think a new kitten will be a joy for you all always allowing the older cat peace and relaxation away from the maelstrom! We also bought the Feliway Friends and classic diffusers to help with calming the atmosphere. Also, the Pet remedy spray-put it your fingers and stroke it around your cat's face and chin- to calm her.

Re: Cat noisy since it's companion died

Posted: Sun Mar 10, 2019 3:33 pm
by Blue Wind
The 6 months female kitten has settled in with Whitby well, but unfortunately Whitby has become seriously ill. The vet isn't sure if it is a virus and might be from the kitten who is from a feral background. Hoping that there is a happy outcome.

Re: Cat noisy since it's companion died

Posted: Sun Mar 10, 2019 4:30 pm
by Lilith
Oh no ... so sorry to hear and keeping all paws and tails crossed here for Whitby.