I have recently adopted an 8 or 9 year old girl who, apparently, wasn't too well treated by her former guardians. She has only been with me for just over a week and, as I guessed would happen, she likes to keep herself to herself for most of the time. However, she sometimes solicits attention by leg rubbing and, occasionally, by jumping into my lap - in both instances she will allow me to gently stroke her for a very short time until she, unexpectedly and rapidly, becomes aggressive with painful bites, powerful scratches and much blood (from me) following - she really goes for it! I try to gauge her body language when these rare opportunities for cuddles arise but I must be misreading her intentions.
I wonder if this behaviour is due to her being unused to me and her new surroundings or whether her treatment by her former guardians have left her traumatised in some way.
I want to stroke her when she's being affectionate but my hands are telling me to steer clear!
I should say that I found Cat (her name) via a friend of a friend of a friend who learned that her former guardians wanted "to get rid of her" so my knowledge of her history is limited - I will be taking her to the vet soon but I wanted to let her settle down here first and, at the moment, I'm worried about getting her into the carrier and how she will react at the vets!
Does anyone have any advice?
Newly Adopted Cat Issue
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Lilith
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Re: Newly Adopted Cat Issue
Hi and welcome 
Good on you for taking on Cat, who sounds quite a handful.
I have one just the same who joined me when she was around 8 months (she's 8 in the summer.) Her previous owners loved her I think, but they were disturbed by her aggression towards their children.
Molly began to bond with me via leg-rubbing, which I think is a good sign. She is the most contrary cat I've ever had in my life and while I can't say I've solved the problem of her, this is what works for us:
She has become very possessive and affectionate, but on her own terms. Sometimes she will even give my hand a face-rub! (BIG honour.) She purrs all the time. But stroke the wrong ear and she'll have you! I'm rarely without scars, even now. When she nips me or lashes out I say, 'no' in a low hissy voice - and ignore her for a minute or two. Then I'll talk to her again - I talk to her all the time as she's the kind of cat who natters all the time. I'll ask - are you going to be a good girl now? Or something equally daft lol.
I praise her whenever she does anything right. But the minute she starts carrying-on - no.
Her favourite place for stroking is her back and tail and I've noticed she likes to be stroked quite hard. A few weeks back another member described how a naughty kitten will often be held down by mother cat, and that this quells it ... is Molly beginning to accept me as mother cat? Sometimes she will even flatten her head and let me stroke her face and ears.
I HAVE got her into a carrier on occasion; it's a case of have carrier ready, quickly scruff cat, grab its back legs, and stow it in and shut door fast before it knows what's hit it. This is through decades of experience, and though I don't care for scruffing except in an emergency, again, that's how mother cat picks up her kittens and it can subdue them for a moment or two. Grabbing the back feet supports the body and also prevents the cat from turning into a tenlegged monster from Mars as you try to get its backend in. However, if Cat proves to be impossible, could it be possible to arrange a home visit from the vet, finances allowing?
This kind of cat is hard work, exasperating, and a longterm project, but it's rather like being a teacher of children with learning difficulties - it's so rewarding, more than rewarding, when they achieve something normal. Molly is the most horrible and troublesome cat I've ever known, but we love each other dearly.
Sorry - edit, hopefully Cat won't be as hard a nut to crack as Molly; it is of course very early days yet and a week's not long in which to build up trust. Molly HAS learned to sheath her claws (sometimes!) now; she knows I respect her and she is learning to respect me; hopefully Cat will learn this a lot faster, bless her. Once I knew a really hostile feral tom who I didn't dare touch; hunger made him visit us; I tricked him into entering a carrier with a titbit of tuna (another good wheeze) and got him neutered ... he moved in and became totally soppy once he realised nobody and nothing would hurt him; he was a marvel, that cat!
Hopefully other members will be along with more advice, but hope this helps for now - and all the best with Cat! Please give her a love from me - when she permits without bloodshed, and please do let us know how you go on with her - all the very best
ps Kay I edited my post before reading yours
Good on you for taking on Cat, who sounds quite a handful.
I have one just the same who joined me when she was around 8 months (she's 8 in the summer.) Her previous owners loved her I think, but they were disturbed by her aggression towards their children.
Molly began to bond with me via leg-rubbing, which I think is a good sign. She is the most contrary cat I've ever had in my life and while I can't say I've solved the problem of her, this is what works for us:
She has become very possessive and affectionate, but on her own terms. Sometimes she will even give my hand a face-rub! (BIG honour.) She purrs all the time. But stroke the wrong ear and she'll have you! I'm rarely without scars, even now. When she nips me or lashes out I say, 'no' in a low hissy voice - and ignore her for a minute or two. Then I'll talk to her again - I talk to her all the time as she's the kind of cat who natters all the time. I'll ask - are you going to be a good girl now? Or something equally daft lol.
I praise her whenever she does anything right. But the minute she starts carrying-on - no.
Her favourite place for stroking is her back and tail and I've noticed she likes to be stroked quite hard. A few weeks back another member described how a naughty kitten will often be held down by mother cat, and that this quells it ... is Molly beginning to accept me as mother cat? Sometimes she will even flatten her head and let me stroke her face and ears.
I HAVE got her into a carrier on occasion; it's a case of have carrier ready, quickly scruff cat, grab its back legs, and stow it in and shut door fast before it knows what's hit it. This is through decades of experience, and though I don't care for scruffing except in an emergency, again, that's how mother cat picks up her kittens and it can subdue them for a moment or two. Grabbing the back feet supports the body and also prevents the cat from turning into a tenlegged monster from Mars as you try to get its backend in. However, if Cat proves to be impossible, could it be possible to arrange a home visit from the vet, finances allowing?
This kind of cat is hard work, exasperating, and a longterm project, but it's rather like being a teacher of children with learning difficulties - it's so rewarding, more than rewarding, when they achieve something normal. Molly is the most horrible and troublesome cat I've ever known, but we love each other dearly.
Sorry - edit, hopefully Cat won't be as hard a nut to crack as Molly; it is of course very early days yet and a week's not long in which to build up trust. Molly HAS learned to sheath her claws (sometimes!) now; she knows I respect her and she is learning to respect me; hopefully Cat will learn this a lot faster, bless her. Once I knew a really hostile feral tom who I didn't dare touch; hunger made him visit us; I tricked him into entering a carrier with a titbit of tuna (another good wheeze) and got him neutered ... he moved in and became totally soppy once he realised nobody and nothing would hurt him; he was a marvel, that cat!
Hopefully other members will be along with more advice, but hope this helps for now - and all the best with Cat! Please give her a love from me - when she permits without bloodshed, and please do let us know how you go on with her - all the very best
ps Kay I edited my post before reading yours
Last edited by Lilith on Wed Feb 06, 2019 2:01 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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Kay
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Re: Newly Adopted Cat Issue
human hands may have been something she came to fear in her earlier home - a fear which she forgets for a moment when being stroked and then it comes rushing back and she attacks that enemy hand
if she comes on your lap then I think progress with her is very likely, but I would advise you do not touch her at all, nor even look as if you are going to, for the time being - let her learn in her own time that she has nothing to fear from you, or your hands
as for the vet visit, I would suggest you leave the carrier out with the door open and some comfy bedding, and chuck a few treats inside a couple of times a day - when the dreaded day comes chuck in the treats and shut the door
that's the theory anyway
if she comes on your lap then I think progress with her is very likely, but I would advise you do not touch her at all, nor even look as if you are going to, for the time being - let her learn in her own time that she has nothing to fear from you, or your hands
as for the vet visit, I would suggest you leave the carrier out with the door open and some comfy bedding, and chuck a few treats inside a couple of times a day - when the dreaded day comes chuck in the treats and shut the door
that's the theory anyway
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Ruth B
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Re: Newly Adopted Cat Issue
Welcome to the forum and thank you for giving Cat a good home even is she isn't the easiest of cats to have around.
My first thought is that it is still very early days if you have only had her a week and it does sound as if she is still reacting to what she perceives as threatening behaviour,so the fact that you are getting interaction with her and some of it is good is a very promising sign. Like you already realise, you don't know what her life was like before you got her and her reactions are probably based on how she was treated before.
my 'problem' cat', Freyja, suffers more from fear than aggression but she will strike out in self defense if she feels she needs to. Therefore for us it has very much been a case of letting her take the lead and backing off at the first sign of stress, you might find that doing something similar with Cat will work as well. You mention that she will already rub your legs and sit on your knee, when she does rather than stroking her, have your hand near her head so she can rub against it if she chooses, rather than you rubbing your hand against her, again when she is rubbing around your legs let your hand hang down and see if she wants to interact with it. She will hopefully learn that she can move away from any interaction any time she wants without needing to resort to violence to do so.
Like Lilith I have to use the scruffing method when ever i need to get Freyja into a carrier. I have the cage style top opening ones. When I know she needs to visit the vets I make the appointment a week in advance and get the carrier out and leave it out and open in the bedroom, I know the bed is the best place for me to have a chance of getting hold of her. Then a at reasonable point before the appointment time I fuss her behind the ears and (hopefully) get hold of the scruff of the neck, this acts to freeze her for a few seconds and I can lift her up and support her weight under the back paws. It's fine when they are baby kittens for the mother to take the whole of their weight by the skin at the back of the neck, but when they are adult sized they need the extra support. I quickly place her in the carrier and get the lid down just as I withdraw my hand so she doesn't have time to lash out. Once fastened it gets covered with a towel to help calm her down and she goes to the vets towel and all. Fortunately the vet will give her a check up and her boosters while she is in the carrier, the top access means that the vet can get to her and see her well, and fortunately Freyja freezes while there. Last time we had to take another of our cats with us so they managed to get her weighed, by weighing her in the carrier then while the other cat was on the table Freyja was switched to the empty carrier and the lid shut.
I think i am probably the one that mentioned about holding the neck to calm a cat down. It is a technique normally used by older cats on younger ones when they are just getting too excited and carried away. The mother starts doing as a way of controlling the kittens when they are in the nest or just leaving it, but i have also seen an older, former feral, male cat use it on kittens that get too carried away playing around him. A similar move is also used to by male cats during mating to hold the female down and is sometimes used as a dominance action in colonies. I've used it myself on my lad (now 4 years old), I got him at 6 months old and he was one of those cats who was full of himself and not scared of anything or anyone, he used to try and go for my throat, not aggressively but as a way of saying he was in charge in the house, being a lot bigger and having hands, meant that I could turn it against him and occasionally ended up with a mouthful of fur. However I think for Cat at the moment withdrawing contact at the first sign of stress would be the better option, she needs to learn she is safe and doesn't need to fight to be safe rather than being put in her place.
Give her time to learn and the space she wants and i'm sure she will soon learn that contact with people is good and learn to enjoy all the fuss and attention, the fact that after a week she is already seeking you out is a sign that she wants the fuss, she possibly just panics when she actually gets it.
My first thought is that it is still very early days if you have only had her a week and it does sound as if she is still reacting to what she perceives as threatening behaviour,so the fact that you are getting interaction with her and some of it is good is a very promising sign. Like you already realise, you don't know what her life was like before you got her and her reactions are probably based on how she was treated before.
my 'problem' cat', Freyja, suffers more from fear than aggression but she will strike out in self defense if she feels she needs to. Therefore for us it has very much been a case of letting her take the lead and backing off at the first sign of stress, you might find that doing something similar with Cat will work as well. You mention that she will already rub your legs and sit on your knee, when she does rather than stroking her, have your hand near her head so she can rub against it if she chooses, rather than you rubbing your hand against her, again when she is rubbing around your legs let your hand hang down and see if she wants to interact with it. She will hopefully learn that she can move away from any interaction any time she wants without needing to resort to violence to do so.
Like Lilith I have to use the scruffing method when ever i need to get Freyja into a carrier. I have the cage style top opening ones. When I know she needs to visit the vets I make the appointment a week in advance and get the carrier out and leave it out and open in the bedroom, I know the bed is the best place for me to have a chance of getting hold of her. Then a at reasonable point before the appointment time I fuss her behind the ears and (hopefully) get hold of the scruff of the neck, this acts to freeze her for a few seconds and I can lift her up and support her weight under the back paws. It's fine when they are baby kittens for the mother to take the whole of their weight by the skin at the back of the neck, but when they are adult sized they need the extra support. I quickly place her in the carrier and get the lid down just as I withdraw my hand so she doesn't have time to lash out. Once fastened it gets covered with a towel to help calm her down and she goes to the vets towel and all. Fortunately the vet will give her a check up and her boosters while she is in the carrier, the top access means that the vet can get to her and see her well, and fortunately Freyja freezes while there. Last time we had to take another of our cats with us so they managed to get her weighed, by weighing her in the carrier then while the other cat was on the table Freyja was switched to the empty carrier and the lid shut.
I think i am probably the one that mentioned about holding the neck to calm a cat down. It is a technique normally used by older cats on younger ones when they are just getting too excited and carried away. The mother starts doing as a way of controlling the kittens when they are in the nest or just leaving it, but i have also seen an older, former feral, male cat use it on kittens that get too carried away playing around him. A similar move is also used to by male cats during mating to hold the female down and is sometimes used as a dominance action in colonies. I've used it myself on my lad (now 4 years old), I got him at 6 months old and he was one of those cats who was full of himself and not scared of anything or anyone, he used to try and go for my throat, not aggressively but as a way of saying he was in charge in the house, being a lot bigger and having hands, meant that I could turn it against him and occasionally ended up with a mouthful of fur. However I think for Cat at the moment withdrawing contact at the first sign of stress would be the better option, she needs to learn she is safe and doesn't need to fight to be safe rather than being put in her place.
Give her time to learn and the space she wants and i'm sure she will soon learn that contact with people is good and learn to enjoy all the fuss and attention, the fact that after a week she is already seeking you out is a sign that she wants the fuss, she possibly just panics when she actually gets it.
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Ofnu
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Re: Newly Adopted Cat Issue
Wow - Lilith, Kay and Ruth - thank you all so much for taking the time and trouble to respond!
I think that Cat's issue is more fear than aggression - a week is a very short time to settle into totally new surroundings with a human you'd never even seen before, let alone had any sort of experience with!
I also wondered about the "hand thing" that Kay mentioned. I guess we'll never know what happened to her with her former guardians but they may have been physically abusive with her so I think I will definitely try the "total hands off" approach for a time and see how it goes.
As for the vet visit - when my other cats were alive, I used to get out the carrier a couple of days before, leave the front and top doors open then, at the appointed hour, slyly close the front door, pick-up the one due for the dreaded visit and plonk him or her inside before they knew what was happening - it worked a treat every time. I think with Cat, I might have to gain a bit more of her trust so I might leave it for another week and see how she's doing.
Thank you all again for your helpful advice and please, if you dare, give Molly, Freyja and your little feline friend, Kay, a hug from me - and I'l keep you posted on Cat... if I have any usable part of my hands left!!
I think that Cat's issue is more fear than aggression - a week is a very short time to settle into totally new surroundings with a human you'd never even seen before, let alone had any sort of experience with!
I also wondered about the "hand thing" that Kay mentioned. I guess we'll never know what happened to her with her former guardians but they may have been physically abusive with her so I think I will definitely try the "total hands off" approach for a time and see how it goes.
As for the vet visit - when my other cats were alive, I used to get out the carrier a couple of days before, leave the front and top doors open then, at the appointed hour, slyly close the front door, pick-up the one due for the dreaded visit and plonk him or her inside before they knew what was happening - it worked a treat every time. I think with Cat, I might have to gain a bit more of her trust so I might leave it for another week and see how she's doing.
Thank you all again for your helpful advice and please, if you dare, give Molly, Freyja and your little feline friend, Kay, a hug from me - and I'l keep you posted on Cat... if I have any usable part of my hands left!!