brother & sister cats of 8yrs now hissing and growling

[JMoney99ca]

I have 2 cats, brother and sister and I have had them since they were about 8 weeks old. They are now 8 as their birthday was just last month. They have always gotten along, chase each other around the house and play, watch the birds, take turns sitting on my lap during tv time etc. They don't snuggle together, but they respect each others space and will play together, etc next to each other etc.

About 6-8 months, my Stanley ate some leaves from some flowers I had gotten. He got pretty sick and threw up a bunch of times. I took him to the vet and they gave him IV etc. I needed to monitor his output so when i brought him home, i set him up in my daughters room with liter, food and water. after about 2 days, he was much better, but then things went down hill. Reintroducing them didn't go well. Lily would hiss and growl and run away, to which he seemed to follow, not understanding what was going on. Needless to say this was horrible. both of my cats have their claws and i was worried about them hurting each other. i kept them separate for the most part, using baby gates so they could see each other, i bought calming treats, i tried noise and water squirting and put one in a cage next to the other etc. i tried everything to acclimate them, but the girl just wouldn't have it. It took a solid two-three weeks before things went back to normal. It was a horrible experience for us all and i don't want to go through that again, so i didn't plan on any vet visits again.

Some current background. I work home and live alone. The virus social distancing is not really impacting my life per say but for my once a week visit to the food store. that is to say the cats routine has not altered. I have not changed routine, food, blankets, or anything at all. But for some reason, the last week or so before the incident, i have heard Lily hiss at Stan walking by. maybe one time per day. I shake a coffee can with coins in it to let them know this is not ok behavior.

Then she did it again. only this time she ran upstairs and he followed, so i did as well. she was under the bed and he was all puffed up and I heard a little scuffle as i was getting the water squirt bottle. i squirted him and he left the room. I went down stairs, fed him and then got the brush out to brush them. she came right down as though nothing had happened, i brushed them both, she licked his head, all was good. the next thing i know, she is behind the couch growling and hissing and he is at the entrance to the couch. eventually he goes and lays down. she went to come out after about an hour and as soon as she saw him (sleeping) she growls and went back behind the couch. i wanted her to come out so i could see if she was hurt or hot and check her ears because she is not acting like herself. i put him in the bedroom upstairs and lured her out a bit with treats. She seemed fine, scared and when she came partially out she ate the treats and while i was petting her and smelling her and feeling all around, she was fine, purring and meowing as usual. then she looked where he had been before and growled and went back into a tent bed behind the couch. I eventually got her out, checked her and she seemed fine health wise so i put her in a separate room and that was over a week ago (sat 4th). just out of nowhere for no reason i can understand or figure out.

I am basically right where i was after the vet visit. She is confined to one section of the house, he is in the rest. Here is what i have done so far:

-given her calming treats (he doesnt like treats)
-put baby gates up to let them see each other safely. she usually sits back in her room and he sits at the gate looking and they just stare at each other
-i say good morning to one, then i open the door to the other one, where i am in between and they can see each other and i say good morning to the other one. usually she doesn't hiss at him during these few minutes
- while i was working in my office, i left the gates up for a few hours and he would come up to check things out and she would just lay somewhere and not take her eyes off the door. I tried being int he room with her and the gates up and he was furious and was climbing and trying to push the gates down.
-i leave her door open and go downstairs with Stan to feed them. they used to each next to each other, but she has been eating in her room. two days she has come down for food, but i put his down and then she comes around the corner, so i put hers down about 5' from his. she starts to move towards the food, but he looks up and the she hisses and goes upstairs.
-i have been rubbing both of them alot with my hands and going from one to another frequently for smell purposes. i pick them both up and cuddle with the same clothes on etc.
-i used cat wipes and wiped them both down a few times
-i have sprayed calming spray in the areas where they sit
-i have started switching who is confined where to get both smells everywhere][/list][/list]
- i spend ample time in the room with her, and downstairs with him and play with them both
- i let Stan into the room where Lily is a few times and she makes her way under the bed before he comes in. one time he checked every corner of the rooms and didnt find her, the next time, he found her it wasn't good. i had been trying not to let him ambush or corner her, but when he found her under the bed, he just stayed still and his tail puffed up because she was growling and making those sounds i only hear from outside feral cats fighting. i was watching on a camera and was in the room before she got out a second growl. he saw me and i said 'lets go' and he came out of the room with me. i left her in there and she continued to meow/growl SO loud even i as scared. not 10 minutes later, both cats were happy purring and rubbing on me, from their separate rooms of course.

At this point, i will keep switching them when i can to allow her to get comfortable down stairs again and keep spending time with each of them.

my questions are:

is he being aggressive when he is 'looking' for her? should i be punishing this behavior (squirt him with the water bottle). I have herd of time-outs, but i cant see how i would get him anywhere when he i mad. he has his claws and teeth and i cant pick him up when he is the slightest bit **** off.

i know enforcing positive behavior is helpful and i give Lily treats when she makes it downstairs and he is around, but he doesnt like treats and i hesitate to have playtime when she is around in case the aggression turns towards her.

Any other suggestions for speeding this process up? I am mentally exhausted from worry and supervised visits and guilt for confining one al the time.

Thanks,

JMoney

[Cat-FAQ]

Hi,

There are many forms of aggressive behaviour that can be observed in cats. This page offers advice on the most common causes of cat aggression, and how to recognise and deal with it: https://www.catchat.org/index.php/cat-b ... aggression

I hope you can work out a solution!