Cat with 2 homes?

[mr miaw]

I used to live in house A with my cat.
I moved out to house B 8 minutes walk away.
I wanted the cat to spend time in both houses as my partner lives in house A.
My partner frequently walks to my place and the cat follows on foot. It also does the journey in opposite direction with my partner.
This is how we get the cat to go to either house: on foot, rather than by car.
It works out well and our cat spends time more or less equally in both houses.
However, on 3 occasions so far, it has walked back to house A by itself. It has never walked from house A to B however.
I felt quite offended by this, as if my house isn't good enough for my cat. It's well fed and looked after here, as much as over there.
The only difference between both places is that my child lives there whereas I am alone here.
Could my cat prefer house A because of the child? My kid frequently teases it to the extent that it often prefers to exit the house to get some peace and quiet.
It stays a few days in my place before going back to the other house, either us taking it, or walking by itself. So it's certainly used to staying here for a while too and if it really didn't like it, it would leave immediately every time.
Could anyone help me decipher why it's preferring the other house?

[Ruth B]

I don't think it is to do with your cat preferring House A over House B or that the child is in House A (unless s/he was particularly attached to the child), my thought is that it is to do with territory.

Cats are very territorial animals and while un neutered males can have territories that are miles across, most neutered males have territories that are much smaller and a female can often only go a few gardens away. An 8 minute walk could be anything from half a mile up to a mile away depending on the speed of walking, this means you are asking your cat to pass through the territory of dozens of other cats each way. Your cat can assume that each territory is home to a cat who is willing to defend it, violently if need be.

The territory is normally divided into three areas, the outer area which borders on other cats territory and is often shared by several cats, an inner area that it considers it's own such as the garden attached to the house, other cats might be able to pass through it, but if seen will often be driven off, normally this is fairly easily done as the cat knows it it encroaching on another's area and is willing to leave without a fight, only if a cat is wanting to expand it's territory will it stay and fight. Then there is the den area. Normally this would be at the centre of the territory, but the way houses and gardens are laid out it can be on the edge with the cat only claiming a few back gardens. The den is the place where the cat feels safest, it is where it returns to when it feels threatened, (it is also the place where it brings any food it catches to eat, much to some of us owner's dismay). If your cat had been living at house A for any length of time, more than just a few weeks then House A is his/her den.

You can't really expect a cat to have two dens, nor can you expect him/her to cross multiple cat territories to get from one to the other, except for when they really feel they want to return to where they feel safest. Not knowing the area you live in, you are also risking them every time they decide to make their own way home, they may not confine themselves to the route your partner takes and there may be dangers other than just other cats and roads they have to contend with.

Looking to the future you have to consider whether sharing him/her is the best option for the cat. Are your partner and child planning on moving into House B as well in the near future, if they are then it is best if the cat either moves with them or moves now and is kept in until they accept House B as their den area. If you and your partner have separated then it might be best for one of you to keep the cat rather than attempt to share as you are doing. If both of you really want a cat, then there are shelters full of cats and kittens who would be happy to help you chose one.

[Mollycat]

I agree with Ruth, if house A was the original home then that is most likely primary territory so there would be no need from a cat's perspective to trundle over to house B.

I have had a cat with two homes, years ago, but it was a fair car journey away. She lived at my mum's house and I would take her to my home when my mum was away for a month every year, then I moved house and brought her with me full time and any time I went away she would be taken back to mum's. She was very comfortable in each place and happily go out without ever trying to leave, but she was very bonded to me and to her original home and my mum. She also enjoyed a walk with me in her later years.

In some ways the fact your two homes are close enough to walk and that he knows the way could be a disadvantage.

[mr miaw]

Thanks for the replies.
I forgot to mention that it is a female cat.
I'd say my cat behaves like Mollycat's in that it will happily walk with us from house to house, we don't force it at all.
The 8 min walk distance in my view is fairly long for a cat, which is why I am surprised that it comes back by itself.
It lived in house A for a few months and now in house B for a few weeks.

The territory explanation makes sense, but why would the cat willingly walk to house B and willingly stay there?
Once it arrives at my house, it settles down and doesn't attempt to follow my partner back to house A.
It goes out at night and is outside my door in the morning.
I know you said a cat can't be expected to have 2 dens, but is it possible in this case?

[Mollycat]

With a little more detail it makes more sense, actually, and yes I don't see why she couldn't be perfectly comfortable and 'at home' in each. If this arrangement has only been a few weeks then going back 3 times one way one not yet the other way doesn't seem all that significant to me, while she gets used to the new arrangement. I would say she sounds like she is settling rather well.

[Ruth B]

Anyone who has had cats will admit there is always an exception to every rule, it could well be that you have that exception.

If she has only been at house A for a few months it could be that she was still sorting out her territory and is happy to add house B to it. If she is going out and not going straight back to house A then that is a very good sign that she is accepting house B as a den as well. The fact that she is able to get back to house A from house B by herself is a good sign that she won't risk getting lost walking between the two.

If it has only been a few weeks then give it time, she might decide she prefers to stay at one house or the other or is happy to commute between the two.

While I'm happy to explain what I understand about a cat's behaviour, I have been around them long enough not to be surprised or upset when one proves me wrong.

[Mollycat]

Anyone who has had cats will admit there is always an exception to every rule, it could well be that you have that exception.

While I'm happy to explain what I understand about a cat's behaviour, I have been around them long enough not to be surprised or upset when one proves me wrong.

Doesn't this just sum up life with cats?

My uncle had a girlfriend who took her cat everywhere and let her out immediately. Cat was totally comfortable anywhere free roaming and always came back to wherever (house, car, caravan etc) she had been let loose from. Incredible.

[fjm]

I travelled a lot with Toby when he was young - mostly to and fro between my flat and my parents' house at first, then into a caravan for a month while waiting for a house sale to go through, then between new house and my parents - he settled immediately wherever we were. The only time he got lost was when I was away and my sister was looking after him in my parents' house - he somehow got across a busy main road, lost his bearings, and eventually turned up at stables a few miles away. It was in the days before the internet and online social media - it still seems my own small miracle that the local grapevine managed to reunite us after nearly two months! A much missed cat - over 25 years since he died, but still very special in my heart.

[mr miaw]

Thanks guys.
I look forward to when my cat will start walking from the other house to my house by itself. It does seem to settle down easily wherever it is.

[Joe_Danger]

I don't think you should be bothered by this kinda stuff, it's no competition dude, it doesn't matter which house the cats walks from or back to, what matters is the cat is safe and healthy and well taken care of.

I felt quite offended by this, as if my house isn't good enough for my cat. It's well fed and looked after here, as much as over there.

Why would you feel offended by anything a cat does? They're pure, innocent creatures with their own vastly different from ours way of thinking and doing things.
Love your pets unconditionally and don't expect anything in return, just love them and be happy they're healthy and well.
That's my approach to pets, be it cats or dogs or bugs, whatever it may be I've been raising and loving over the years.