Are my cats fighting or playing?

[Jessiemessy]

My cats have started to ‘play’, but I’m not if it’s playing or not, or my older cat is being a bit rough to show dominance?
They have sniffed noses a few times, he has swiped her a few times, all during supervised visits as my older cat seems nervous about the new addition. We introduced them slowly and this is the first visit this has happened.
here’s a vid I got:
https://youtu.be/rJCz0lgZ8oE

They both come back for more. The older cat came back after being outside for a bit and started again. And my kitten doesn’t seem put off, whenever I let her see him she rushes over and pounces at him. She always seems to want to play with him. I wondered if her energy is too much for my older cat and he’s telling her he doesn’t want to.

He watches her play too. Sometimes when he watches he goes and swipe her or seem to start fight/play but we’ve always stopped them. It’s only recently this has started as we’ve waited to see what happens.

He eats in the same room with her no problem. They’ve sniffed noses a few times then he goes off to do his own thing. He’s even sat on the bean bag in the same room cleaning and having a snooze while she’s nearby on the sofa although not for long.

[fjm]

Looks a bit like light-weight fighting to me - not full on attack mode, but not exactly careful play either. i think the best way of knowing it is play is that they both enjoy it and come back for more - in this case the smaller cat is clearly not enjoying the encounter and seems to want to escape even before he pounces. I would make sure he cannot corner her, and that she always has a way out that does not involve going past him. And intervene to distract him before he gets into the habit of bullying her.

[Jessiemessy]

Thank you. They both come back for more. The older cat came back after being outside for a bit and started again. And my kitten doesn’t seem put off, whenever I let her see him she rushes over and pounces at him. She always seems to want to play with him. I wondered if her energy is too much for my older cat and he’s telling her he doesn’t want to.

He watches her play too. Sometimes when he watches he goes and swipe her or seem to start fight/play but we’ve always stopped them. It’s only recently this has started as we’ve waited to see what happens.

He eats in the same room with her no problem. They’ve sniffed noses a few times then gone off to door his own thing. He’s even sat on the bean bag in the same room cleaning and having a snooze while she’s nearby on the sofa.

[Kay]

my rule of thumb has always been the noise they make - growling accompanied by hackles raised is true aggression, and a danger sign, but hissing and pawing is warning without danger

[Jessiemessy]

Thank you. Older cat hissed when they first met but hasn’t in over a month or two. They never make any noise at each other.

[Mollycat]

my rule of thumb has always been the noise they make - growling accompanied by hackles raised is true aggression, and a danger sign, but hissing and pawing is warning without danger

Yes play can be pretty convincing sometimes especially when you're not used to it and one of them is only little. There are other signs of all not being well in complete silence sometimes, when one controls doorways and resources, or intimidation rolling.

Looks good to me, looks like quite convincing but not even all that rough play. Tails wagging but not fluffed up, high when "attacking", bat-bat then stand back, kitten on her back isn't submissive at all it's a very strong fighting position so it's almost as if he's teaching her. Which is what play is all about. She doesn't seem to have any problem with him and I would say though it looks a bit ham fisted to us he isn't stepping over the line to her.

When I first go my girl she wanted to play rough with my boy but her was horrified, he was a pedigreeee don't-you-know and didn't *fight* like a common alley cat! So when she used to pounce on him he would complain, wriggle loose and run off. Eventually they learned to meet half way, she would run at him and chase him into the other room, then a pause, then they would come back with him doing the chasing.

[Jessiemessy]

Thank you, that makes me feel better. I’ve never cats play so rough and I was terrified. Especially as he’s so big and she’s so small.

Ha, I can imagine your cat looking down it’s nose like what is this peasant doing. I’m glad to hear they sorted it out too and learned to meet halfway.