My cat is not clingy

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LutherPratt
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My cat is not clingy

Post by LutherPratt »

Hi guys, have you ever felt disappointed about your cat not being friendly or clingy to you? You must feel me if you have an unfriendly cat. I mean, it would never be interested in approaching us or appreciate being stroked.
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Ruth B
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Re: My cat is not clingy

Post by Ruth B »

Never been disappointed in a cat I have had, whether affectionate or not.

I was 6 years old when my family got our first cat, and he wasn't particularly affectionate, you could stroke him if he wanted to be stroked, if not he warned you off, and then, if you didn't leave him alone, would strike claws out. It was just his way and I learnt from him that an animal is not a toy, they have their own personality and desires and are not put on this Earth just to please us.

One of my current mob, I couldn't touch for months, she was just too scared, but I knew that when I adopted her. Now 5 years on, i can fuss her when she decides it is safe to allow me to fuss her, but I have never picked her up to cuddle her, I can barely pick her up to get her in a carrier for a vets visit, and possibly I never will. She is however happy living here, under her own terms, doing what she wants when she wants, and every time she comes to me to get some fuss is a wonderful gift, from her to me, as she is, at that point, saying she trusts me.
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Mollycat
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Re: My cat is not clingy

Post by Mollycat »

Never disappointed, but sometimes honoured that a cat would trust me and love me, especially if the cat has not had a very good life before.

When I was very young I was introduced to the Just So stories, and I was mesmerised by The Cat Who Walked By Himself. That is the Cat I fell in love with, the Cat whose love must be earned, who lives life on his terms and takes orders from no-one.

My Bobby was bred to Ragdoll characteristics - easy going, gentle, loyal, relaxed. He was expected to allow brushing and handling for show without ever protesting or being disagreeable. When he retired and came to live with me, I encouraged him to have an opinion of his own. When I brushed too much, when I stroked where he didn't want, when he was on my lap and I moved, when he didn't like his food, I allowed him to tell me and I respected him. Then we could negotiate and sometimes I could persuade him by being gentle and patient, and sometimes not. He had the most wonderful strong yet quiet character, nurturing and strong, and I might never have really got to know him if I hadn't helped him to express it. He also developed a strong and very different relationship with my partner, and became friends with the dog after a bit of hissing, and all that was with my support.

They are rarely what we want or expect, but often they are so much more, if we just allow them to be themselves.
Joe_Danger
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Re: My cat is not clingy

Post by Joe_Danger »

My cats aren't toys or there for my personal entertainment, some of mine are more clingy than others, some have changed over the years. I'm just happy when they're well, when they're healthy, why would I be disappointed in a cat, they're wonderful creatures, I'd never feel disappointment in a pet, that's just wrong IMO.
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