Cat Chat Feline Forum

We adopted a rescue cat 2 months ago from an animal sanctuary. She had always lived with other cats and so this would be the first time she had lived as a single cat.

She is inherently shy, but after a few weeks struck up a friendship with an enormous ginger tomcat from a few doors down. Tragically, about a week ago he was hit by a car outside our house and had to be put to sleep. Molly was in our window at the time and may have seen it happen.

Since then she has been very vocal, obsessed with going out (the tomcat was a mostly outdoor cat), and has taken to carrying her favourite toy around the house crying. She's also started grooming her back to the point of tugging out tufts of hair quite obsessively.

She is only 1 but has a very saggy belly, and I wonder if she had a litter before she was neutered. Maybe being taken away from her sanctuary buddies, living alone and losing her friend is taking its toll on her? She's still affectionate towards me but isn't a lap cat and I don't know how to help her.

some cats like other cats, and some don't - if your Molly is one of the former, than I think that's a good excuse to give a good home to another cat currently without one

an enormous ginger male might be waiting for you, and her, as I type

Oh bless her, I'm so sorry to hear about the ginger tom, that's really sad It does sound like she'd benefit from a friend. It's a myth that cats are solitary and prefer to live alone; lots of cats do but lots of cats don't. My cat Clive exhibited similar behaviour after being separated from other cats - I had hoped he'd adapt to being an only cat but after a month it was obvious he never would. He walked around the house wailing and exhibited "searching" behaviour and was very unsettled and it worsened with time. It made me incredibly sad to see him so unhappy so I felt like my only option was to try a friend for him as I knew he was used to living with other cats - it was clear to me that was the problem and there wasn't any other underlying behavioural issue. He was just lonely!

I chose to adopt a 4 month old kitten that I was told enjoyed being around other cats and it was like an overnight transformation. Clive met the kitten (Harvey) and his behaviour completely stopped immediately; from the moment he set eyes on the kitten that was the end of his wailing.

It sounds to me like Molly is definitely a prime candidate for a friend, any good rescue will help you find a good match for her

Yay! We're going on honeymoon in 2 weeks so we're going to start looking after that. Molly's going to a cattery while we're away so it will be interesting to see if her behaviour changes after some time with other cats. (Other than hating us for abandoning her for 2 weeks!)

Honeymoon! Congratulations

I wouldn't read too much into Molly's behaviour after she's been in the cattery - the change in environment and lack of a familiar human can be enough to change behaviour for a few days after a stay and often the cats in the cattery that they stay with are stressed out and/or don't like other cats so it can stress your cat out and have the opposite effect to what you might expect.

Mine both really like other cats but they're always really weird after staying in a cattery - they mope about and they're a bit skittish for a few days afterwards Although they also become super clingy which is a nice treat as usually they're a little indifferent unless they want something

Thanks im really stressing about putting her in the cattery; it's got a brilliant reputation so I know she'll be well cared for but I worry she will be sad and think she's back in the rescue centre!

Hello

The first time our boy went to the cattery was only 6 weeks after he'd come to us from rescue and he was very down when her was there - fortunately only for 3 days whilst we moved. But when he went this summer for 9 days, and I was very concerned about how he would be, he was a star, so chilled out and relaxed. He and my little girl who went with him were the cattery's favourite guests that week! So Molly may be a little put out the first time, but I think two weeks will give her time to adjust to it, and when she goes again in the future she will be well adjusted.

How exciting that you will be able to get another little one!

I don't know what we should get though, part of me says a Tom as that's who she made friends with before, but then I think maybe a younger kitty so she still feels like the dominant cat. She's only 1 herself so that would also be an excuse to get a kitten! the main criteria though should be that they can be around other cats.

Yes, that's right, ask the rescue well in advance to identify a social kitty who likes other cats. I agree, one younger than Molly and general opinion seems to be the girls accept a boy better than another girl, although of course you can't generalise.

Yeah I'd be inclined to say a young male would be a good fit but obviously it depends on the individual and a rescue will help you find the right one
I'm sure Molly will be OK after her cattery experience, they usually adapt quite quickly and although they're put out they're always particularly thankful when they get home again

I can't wait! We only got married 2 months ago and everyone is asking when we're having babies; molly is my baby and we're getting another one so no human babies required for a good while yet yay!!

First of all Congratulations to you both!

Yes, getting a kitty friend for Molly sounds a wonderful idea. When Bobby's adoptive mommy, Lily, disappeared he would sit in the window for hours and cry for her. Then he made friends with Tommy.

I would get a boy to keep your girl company. In my experience girls tolerate each other boys or boy/girls are friends.

(Heather)
Have you chosen your 'Tudor' rose yet? I think the rose you are thinking of is a lovely rose and a lovely idea to remember Henry. But it only flowers once and is inclined to blackspot which makes it look very scruffy. A similar, old-fashioned rose is Rosa rugosa. It is tough as old boots, disease-free and flowers all summer. The variety 'Roseraie De L'Hay' has beautiful, highly-scented flowers all summer and lovely fat, red hips in the autumn (and yes, I am a big fan of this rose ). The reason I'm going on about this is, some years ago we planted a rose called 'Loving Memory' in memory of our dog Katie. It seemed a good idea at the time. But the rose turned out to be as scruffy as the dog . Appropriate, maybe, but real hard work.




Hey, two posts for the price of one!!!!

I SHOULD have addressed the bit about Henry and the rose to Heather

And I can't really blame it on Jet Lag as I was only in England! I think I'll go lie down in a darkened room!

We may not need to get molly a friend....latest breaking news....I'm a bit suspicious that she's pregnant!! Her belly is definitely bigger than it was a couple of weeks ago, and I don't think it's just down to good food. I emailed the sanctuary we got her from who ensured us she was neutered; turns out she had this done before going to them and there is no paperwork for it so who knows if it was even done!!

I've never had a pregnant cat before and am making assumptions based in google which isn't always the best diagnostic tool! But her behaviour does seem to fit!

OOOH 'ECK!

It wouldn't be a terrible thing if she was, just unplanned! Anyone who has experienced a pregnant kitty what were their symptoms/behaviour?

no wonder she's been mourning that big ginger tomcat

presumably he is the prime suspect?

I would hope so, or we might need to have a discussion about loose morals haha! Although I did learn a few weeks ago that cats can carry kittens fathered by different toms in the same pregnancy! Confusing but true!

The sanctuary is contacting the local council who brought her in to see if they can get some more information, after all I may be jumping to conclusions! But if she is, we have her booked into a cattery for 2 weeks in 10 days and im worried they won't take her if she's in the family way!

The only thing that makes me think she isn't pregnant is I've read that cats tend to be more homely and less interested in going out when pregnant. Molly had never been out for more than about 2 hours before, and never during the day, but yesterday she was gone from 9am til 6.30pm; we were getting a tad worried! She is just being weird in general. If she is pregnant it would explain a lot, if not then we will definitely get her a companion after holiday.

Heheh, seems she might have sorted the problem herself!

A similar thing happened to me many years ago when we got Giddy as a kitten, our first cat. She was being very destructive whilst we were out, pulling up the carpets, and we were just considering getting her a playmate when she came into her first season, escaped out of a bedroom window and came home 2 days later, in the 'family way'. We kept the kittens and had nearly 20 years with our large and very happy cat family - it definitely solved the company problem! My old Minnie, at the grand old age of 19.5, is the last remaining 'kitten'.

I can't remember Giddy's behaviour when pregnant, but good luck in trying to get some more background info, and I guess a trip to the vets is in the offing.

I think so, although the last 2 days she's only spent about an hour in the house so getting her could be an issue!

So we've come back from honeymoon, Molly has definitely put on weight but I thinkvthats just from being a greedy piggy at the cattery and not that she's pregnant!! Still no confirmation that she's neutered though.

Anyway, we potentially found a new friend for her!! An old work colleague of mine has 8 week old kittens. Only 1 male is left, all black like Molly. 2 people had said they would take him but have let her down so I kind of feel like it's fate that I saw her facebook about him still being available the day we got back! I've not committed as I'm still concerned that she won't accept him, but I figured she's most likely to accept a kitten as she will still feel like alpha cat. What does everyone think??

Welcome back - hope you had a wonderful time.

As a first off I'd be tempted to whisk Molly off to the vet to 100% confirm she isn't pregnant; given the time that has elapsed I too would suspect she's not but it would be good to have vet confirmation

Regarding the kitten I think a young male of 8 weeks would be absolutely fine; so go for it! You'd obviously need to monitor them for a bit to make sure she doesn't get over exuberant when it comes to play time Good luck

Yep, I agree. Get her checked - just to be on the safe side. But it seems like that kitten has been waiting for you!

Hope you had a wonderful Honeymoon!

Will do. We said yes to the kitten, picking him up tomorrow. My only issue is that we live in a small terraced house which isn't really practical for separating them all the time. We can put him in the living room at night to stop him getting out the flap but does anyone have any advice on introductions in a small space?

I agree too, its fate and a little black male kitten , (they are always left on shelf ) should get on really well .And just in time for Halloween....

Might have a few hisses at first, and let Molly have her food first, and a bit seperate from the little one.