OPINIONS PLEASE.....BARNEYS FIRST TRIP OUTDOORS !!!!

[JulieandBarney]

Well, I decided that today would be the day I introduce my boy to the outside world, as he loves to look outside and he has been in since October/November last year, I adopted Barney from Blue Cross, for those who do not know us, ...so I held him in my arms and walked around the garden with him, which he was very happy with, all the time the patio doors were open to the house, it seemed the further I walked him from the patio doors, the more his claws sunk in to my arms to hold on tight....so I brought him back, set him down a few feet from the door, by the bird table and he ran straight back in the house !!.....Is this normal or is this Barney telling me 'I don't want to go out' !.....I just want him to be happy.....he loved being in my arms and listening to the birds when we were outside ...but he didn't seem to like being put down on the floor...hence racing back inside...........I will go with whatever he wants, but would welcome opinions on my boys reaction from you lovely people yet again........

[Annie1956]

How is Barney doing now in the great outdoors?

[SarahT1 [PLLE]]

Bless him! I think he's just naturally cautious. It's all new to him and he wants to be close to his Mummy. He may get more confident and enjoy gentle forays outside or he may choose to stay in. I think you'll find out bit by bit. You won't know for a while but you won't be leaving him on his own so he'll always be able to do what he's happiest doing. I must say I wish that had been Edgar 's reaction! I had hoped we could let him have supervised outings in the garden before the cat proofing goes up, as Pepsi does, but he looked up at the fences very calculatingly straight away!! He was escorted back inside v quickly! Xx

[Jacks]

I think it really depends on his history - he's had 6-7 months indoors but probably longer that he was in rescue and if he's generally fairly nervous he will be overwhelmed by smells, sounds, the breeze, etc. After 7 months indoors with us Sophie, who had been an 'experienced stray' like Edgar, sauntered out, sniffed a few plants, and set off round the garden then over the fence to check the neighbourhood out, then back home - as confident as anything! The two kittens who had been in longer were very very cautious and nervous and they took several days to adjust to the newness and to venture the length of the garden. Now they are both confident although Jessie, who was born at the end of the garden, never goes further than one garden on either side - she's the more nervous of the two. Lara is now a confident little adventurer whose favourite haunt is the grounds of the school opposite.

The thing is all our kitties are different and their nature and histories will determine how confident they are, but there's every chance that in a few days Barney will enjoy gently exploring his new world - or even surprise you with his confidence! As others are saying, be led by him, and be happy that Barney knows EXACTLY where his home is and headed straight inside as soon as he could

[HRHFluffy]

Oh what a little sweetie he is I can just imagine him clinging onto you and digging his claws in the further you got away from the patio doors. I am not experienced with this at all. I seem to always say that on your posts. Sorry

However I agree with what the others have said. Be led by what Barney feels comfortable in doing. You will gradually learn how much he wants to be out in the garden and how far he wants to go. He may decide he'd rather be indoors the majority of the time.

Well done for being brave. Give that lovely boy a tickle from me xx

[JulieandBarney]

Thanks to you all...I really value your opinions...and Carol, you always support me, like Sarah, so never think what you add doesn't help, it really does.......well I walked him around the garden again today, in my arms of course ! ....He was less afraid and a little more 'nosey' .....set him down in the same place and this time he slowly sauntered back in, rather than the mad dash yesterday....so I think it's gently, gently for Barney. he is very attached to me, so that may be making him feel a little less independent than most.......he sleeps next to me and cries if he can't reach me if a door is shut, otherwise he rarely meows, so he is a bit of a baby.....just don't want to make him feel that he HAS to go out, it can be so difficult to decide what is the right thing to do......

[Lyn from Australia]

Hi Julie, it seems as if Barney is doing very well. I had to smile to myself - you have to encourage him to go outside - I have to beware every time I open my front door that one or the other of mine may be lurking and waiting on his or her chance to get out between my legs, so sometimes I wish my lot were more like Barney. It would be lovely for you both if he gains a bit more confidence, but not too much, so that you know that he'll stay close. He's a handsome big boy who loves his mum. Who wouldn't love this guy?

[HRHFluffy]

Hi Julie. It sounds like Barney has been a little braver today. It's great that you're going at his pace.

He is a real mummy's boy isn't he! How adorable!! Give him a big squeeze from me xx

[SarahT1 [PLLE]]

That sounds like good steady progress, Julie. Perhaps Barney will enjoy a bit of sun tomorrow. Pepsi sat out in the garden for a couple of hours today but she always made sure I wasn't far away and meowed when I looked over at her from my wall painting task!

Your boy is such a darling. A lovely big Mummy's boy; what could be nicer!

How's fluffy Fi? X

[JulieandBarney]

Well. we went out together today again....and I totally lost it !! Barney started to wander away into the garden and I chased after him and brought him back in !! I feel awful as I am just thinking of myself, but I am terrified of losing him.........I have no idea how to progress from here, as my worry of losing him relates to lots of other things going on at the moment.......x

[HRHFluffy]

Julie don't worry. It's perfectly understandable that you would panic. Especially with the other stresses in your life at the moment. I don't really know what to suggest. I know you want Barney to be happy. Am I right in thinking that you have a high fence in your garden? If that's the case then Barney isn't going to be scrambling a fence at this stage. He won't be that adventurous yet. And if he's only going out with you under your supervision then he is even less likely to wander off.

Thinking of you. It will be alright in the end. You and Barney will work it out together xx

[SarahT1 [PLLE]]

Don't beat yourself up Julie. It's quite natural to feel anxious. Is it possible to cat proof your garden so Barney has run of the garden but can't leave it?

[Lyn from Australia]

Boy, can I relate! Perhaps to give yourself a bit of extra security, let Barney out when he's hungry and just about due for a meal. Hopefully that will ensure that even if he wanders off a bit too far for your nerves that he'll return reasonably quickly. Looking forward to updates.

[SarahT1 [PLLE]]

Morning all

Julie, how's this for scary? Last night OH had gone outside the front door into our patio front garden (mercifully on a residential square so no car access at the front, which on some occasions can be inconvenient but good from cat point of view). He came back in in a hurry to report a mystery leak (plumber coming at 8am!) and then got stuck in under the sink to try to identify where it was coming from. Lou and Edgar had been upstairs and I did see them come down but I assumed they were in the hall where they often sit watching us if we're in the kitchen. About 15 minutes later I went into the hall to say hello to them to discover NO kitties and an OPEN FRONT DOOR!! I dashed out and saw two curious furbabes exploring! I automatically said very firmly 'Lou, Edgar, IN!!' and they flew back in like naughty children caught in the act. I was so relieved I didn't even think to tell OH off for leaving the door open! We gave them lots of praise for coming straight back in which was a good sign that they do want to be in home rather than the great unknown. So I hope that reassures you a little, Julie that Barney would be more likely to want to wander off than come indoors and I do worry about Edgar as an ex stray.
Fusses to your gorgeous boy!

[HRHFluffy]

Sarah my heart just skipped several beats reading about Lou Lou and Edgar's adventure. You did well to remain calm(ish) and get them back in. Like you say with Edgar being an ex stray he will be very curious about the outside world. And little Lou probably thought what great fun it would be to follow him.
So glad they're safe

[SarahT1 [PLLE]]

Julie, sorry, the text in my post got oddly mixed up, so I've edited now and I hope it makes sense! I think Carol worked it out!

[JulieandBarney]

Hi Sarah......It sounded fine to me !......Sounds like Edgar and Lou Lou were heading for an adventure !...Lucky you realised in time...Well I got up this morning to find the landing window wide open, hubby forgot and opened it in the middle of the night, Barney likes to sit on the window ledge looking out and its a very short drop to the garage below !! He made no attempt to get out at all, I opened my eyes this morning to find the usual pair of eyes staring into my face and two front paws wrapped firmly around my wrist as per usual !!...He could very easily have jumped out onto the roof......xx

[SarahT1 [PLLE]]

Good boy, Barney! He just wants to be with his Mummy!

[HRHFluffy]

Sarah I hadn't even noticed there was anything wrong with your post. Mind you I've had very little sleep thanks to looking after the little girl so maybe that's why it all made sense

Julie your little boy just melts my heart. He really does. I had tears in my eyes after reading your post. That sweet boy. The way he sleeps with his paws wrapped around your wrist just makes me want to come over and give him such a big cuddle. He just wants to be with his mummy. How lovely. I'm so glad you gave him the loving home he so deserves. Give him a tummy tickle from me.

[JulieandBarney]

Hi Carol....and by the way Hi to Lynn from Australia !!!.........

Yes, he is such a loving little boy and I really am terrified of losing him.....he always seems to wrap his paws around my wrist just before I wake up, I think it started with him dragging my hand in for bites and bunny kicks ! Now it's almost like his comfort blanket......I love the fella to bits, so his outdoor contact is not going well at all, I know someone on the last older forum commented that anyone who did not allow their cat outside was cruel and keeping them prisoner and this keeps playing on my mind.....crazy I know.. !!....x

[SarahT1 [PLLE]]

Julie, there are some wonderful people on here whose cats are indoor only or who have restricted outdoor access, as we know, and their furbabes are obviously very happy. Just do what's right for you and your boy. Xx

[Shelly and Dora]

Hi Julie.

Dora is an indoor only girl with a large secure outdoor area which houses my table & chairs, BBQ etc.

I appreciate everyone has differing views on this however I live close to a busy road. Dora has always been indoor, as were her mum & dad who are owed by an ex work colleague of mine. I bought her home to me when she was 12.5 weeks old and I hadn't at that time decided she would be an indoor girl. She's such a scaredy girly & would have no road sense at all.

Having said that, and not wanting to start a backlash of the indoor/outdoor debate; she is a very happy girl. She is my world and I give her everything I can to make her world the best. She has toys, scratch posts & beds everywhere. My carpet is covered in boxes and toys all the time. She only goes out into her outdoor play area if I'm out there. If I come in she follows me.

Every night since I bought her home she has slept beside me in bed. In the colder months she lifts the duvet, slips in underneath and curls up against me. Every morning I wake up to the gentlest paw prodding on my face and a little wet nose pushed against my nose.

If I'm upstairs so is she, if I'm downstairs she's there beside me. We are best friends. I don't doubt she loves me as much as I love her & my heart overflows with love for her.

It's not right for everyone, and I know there's lots that totally disagree with an indoor only cat. However, you have to do what feels right for you and Barney.

I'm not saying keeping him indoors is right for you or him, all I am saying is that you don't have to bow to peer pressure. You know your boy best x

[JulieandBarney]

Thank you Shelley, its so good to hear from your perspective.....it means so much believe me.....Barney is so happy 'at home' he makes no attempt to want to go outside and we give him lots of 'play time' each day, he is an older boy from rescue and loves to be in the house and 'safe' as his previous life I understand was far from that.........we give him everything he needs and he is very 'clingy' with us in that he loves his fuss and cuddles.....I don't want to deny his freedom but I also want to keep him safe.....and it's a fine line....I live in a rural area, so no main roads and our garden is large with 6' fencing.....I just feel so reluctant to just let him roam free right now as I also have family worries, with my mom just being diagnosed with Lung cancer, the thought of losing him too would just do it for me ...as churlish as that may sound...x

[HRHFluffy]

Dearest Julie. Please forget the comments from the old forum. And that's an order

You do not have to force Barney to be an outdoor cat just because of someone's rather outspoken opinion. You do what is right for you and Barney.

If he is showing no obvious signs of wanting to explore the great outdoors then perhaps go back to how things were. Or have an arrangement where he only goes out for very short periods when you are in the garden with him. Fluffy has adjusted to this routine pretty well. Ok it's a little inconvenient for me to stop whatever I am doing because she wants to go out and I need to accompany her. But in our case, I feel she is vulnerable to other cats coming into the garden and bullying her especially now she is older and not in good health. The vet told me to be careful with her outside and make sure she doesn't get chased by any cats as that excitement could give her a heart attack. So, she's stuck with me following her everywhere.

Shelly's Dora is the perfect example of a cat that clearly doesn't want to go outside. Dora is perfectly content with her indoor life.

Do what you think is best. There are no rules. Barney is your boy and he adores you. That's all that matters. Hope I've helped a little. Sending big hug xx

[jan1957]

Hi Julie
So sorry to hear your sad news about your mum.
Please don't beat yourself up about Barney staying indoors. Look how far he's developed in his relationship with you since he came to live with you. Barney sounds happy and secure with you and with his life. Do what you feel is right for you, go by your gut instinct. I've stopped taking notice of anyone who has anything negative to say to me about E&G ...... The way we spoil them, the 'Colditz' type garden they roam around in. Everyone has different thoughts and ideas. All I can say is that OH and I are happy with the security our boys have. I'm sure you feel the same way with your gorgeous Barney.
Please take care, and keep yourself fit and strong.
E&G sending soft nose rubs and high paws to Barney boy

[SarahT1 [PLLE]]

Shelly, Carol and Jan, what great replies. Julie, you know your friends on here don't judge, just back each other up on what they feel is instinctive right for their boys and girls. Ignore anything else. Your heart will tell you what's right for Barney. I know Pepsi is much older than Barney but I let her potter on her own in the garden now but she's always looking for me and meowing down the garden at me. If I go in and close the patio door so she can be out there but L&E not as yet, she soon comes to the door asking me to open it again. She likes to see that her way back indoors is accessible. She chooses for herself but I am very pleased she knows where her safe place is. They're not daft!

[Jacks]

Remember too that Barney is a rescue with a history of abandonment - for him the idea of the big outdoors may not be an attractive option! Many cats are happy just looking out of the window and have no desire to actually go out there.

When I got Sophie I was told she may never want to go outside because of the state she'd been in when she was rescued. After 7 months indoors with us she saw my husband in the garden and asked to go out. I let her and she sauntered around like an old pro. But that is her. They thought at the shelter she was quite and timid and wouldn't want to play. They were wrong about that too - we now know our Soph has a mind of steel under that soft fluffy coat and there are no cats she will let better her.... She also LOVES to play. We know her now, and you know Barney. He's your boy - you do what's best for him. Whatever is right for him is the right thing.

[JulieandBarney]

What would I ever do, without you lovely people ? Thank you all so much..... I think I cling on to my little boy because of my own Moms cancer and he is like a comfort to me....bless him, he is always there.....x

[Crewella]

Julie, don't worry - the kindest thing you can do is let Barney do what he wants, and if he's showing no signs of wanting to get out there, then he's obviously happy as he is. I would just leave things be for now. (((hugs)))

[JulieandBarney]

Thank you all once again......tonight he was in my arms in the porch before hubby went to work, and as soon as the door was opened to the outside, he panicked and clung on to me for dear life......his eyes were like saucers !!.....So Barney stays put until he changes his mind I reckon.....!!!!.... x