Cat Chat Feline Forum

Hi All,

I took in a rescue cat called Rory last friday, so today is day 5. We got him in a very poor and starving state (he'd been abandoned on the streets), so have fed him up and will continue to do so until he's a good weight again.

Until yesterday he was all mellow and mild and a good soft tempered cat. Now suddenly today it's like he's woken up and decided to show us his temper. He's gone for me a few times, over nothing. I said hello - always gently - held out my hand in the same way as always and he's just gone for me. I have children of 6 and 11, so need him to control his impulses. Also he's a Maine coon so has ridiculously long hair which needs brushing every day otherwise itknots up. He already is missing almost half his fur, as it was shaved off in the refuge from neglect. I managed to brush him yesterday, being extremely gently about it to gain his trust, but then today it was an all out battle of wills. He ran away, made to bite me etc....In the end I stayed him with my hand and spoke gently and just made him sit still while I brushed the bits I could see were beginning to knot up.

So here's my question, I know I need to built up masses of trust with him, and he probably has a lot of issues, so don't want to be telling him off too much yet, or forcing my will on him. But he'll end up in a mess if I don't brush him, and I can't allow him going for me or my kids. My telling him off is simply raising my voice very slightly, making the tone harsher and putting my finger in the air between us. I never hit or shout at animals, I find my approach is enough for my existing cat and previous ones that they know they're being told off without if being harsh, he knew also I was telling him off.

I make sure to have positive time with him each day, cuddling up next to each other and he likes that, also playing with him for a few mins here and there to build positive memories between us. I just don't like that I'm having to tell him off already. He's obviously been through a hell of a lot, nearly starving to death, and he had a bad car accident (must be at least over a year ago) and lost his tail. So I want him to feel safe and secure here, but without us getting scratched and bitten in the process. What do you think?

He has a big adopted brother (14yo) that I have already in the house, and so far they've made peace apart from the odd 10s of bad language between them it's alright. They stay away from each other, although I notice Rory is now challenging Louis today by going into his room etc.

Thanks
Heather

I'm not an expert but I do know that when cats change their behaviour or temperament it can be an indication that there is something wrong physically. Maybe the cat isn't feeling well? Cats are very good at hiding when things are wrong and behaving badly can be a sign.

Just basing this off my own experience of course. When my cat was about 6 months old she went from being very playful and friendly to biting, scratching, hissing and running away from people. I took her to the vet and she had a mild water infection that she needed antibiotics for. 2 days on the medicine she was much more mellow and after a week she was back to normal.

With the cat being a rescue it could be that something has acted as a trigger maybe? It could be a sound or smell that's reminded him of something in his past and it's caused a behaviour change.

My advice would be to speak to a vet and see if they have any suggestions. As you said, you need to be able to groom him and you don't want him going for your children. I know some essential oils can calm cats and it would be good if you could get one of the feliway plugins to help the cat relax.

I hope you manage to get it sorted!

Hi, Sophie, well said, we've overlapped, but I'm posting this as it stands

Hi Heather,

The honeymoon period's worn off. He's finding his paws - and claws and teeth too.

I have one just like this. She arrived 5 years ago as a meek and gentle adolescent (after terrorising her first home) and soon began to terrorise us, apart from her Uncle Finn, a large and placid ex-feral (sadly no longer with us.) She was a HORRIBLE cat, and still can be. She's half grasshopper, half devil and half Scottish wildcat!

I wouldn't be without her now, but it was a rough ride. The trouble with this sort of problem cat is that you have to establish boundaries but at the same time keep building up the cat's self-esteem. And you've got an extra difficulty with needing to groom him.

I think you're doing the right things; I find a scandalised whisper and an upraised paw (out of reach though because mine will still smack me back) works well. Also, during everyday chat and if the cat does anything right, even just eating/using tray, praise lavishly, tell them how beautiful, clever etc they are. Blink at them, all the cat language stuff. If there's a misdemeanour, I withdraw all attention for a short while, and then return to the 'she's going to be a good girl now, isn't she?' Although I know she won't be for long lol. So this is what's worked for us.

Rehabilitating a cat like this isn't easy, but it's very rewarding. My Molly's given me so much love that I feel guilty about all the times I wished I'd never set eyes on her The battle's not over yet; I'm beginning to 'train' her to allow me to (gently and briefly) invade her space when she's on her favourite bed etc - a small stroke and a lot of praise. But she gets on much better with the other cats (the ones in her first home moved out en masse.) Bullying, if I caught her at it, was quelled with a quick water spray under her tail; meant she had to back down from her quarry. Eventually just the sound of the bottle being shaken or the words 'squirty bottle's coming!' stopped her in her tracks.

I think you're doing very well with such a new and difficult cat, and hopefully there will be others on here with more advice, especially around the grooming, but you seem to have made a good start with that too.

All the very best with him and please keep updating

Hi Lilith and Sophie,

thanks for your input. Lilith your description of your scottish hell cat made me laugh, I can picture her exactly. I haven't ever tried a water spray, maybe I should . My old cat was a sassy and a very naughty little girl, she exasperated me at times too, but I still miss her big personality. She was a "Special" cat with lots of issues from the rescue center too, she'd been there twice before we took her on.

I don't think anything is wrong with him physically, I think he was almost folded in on himself when he arrived and wasn't showing his true personality as he was exhausted from lack of nutrition - he hates cat biscuits and they only offered them at the shelter, so was starving there too :-/ From yesterday he seems really perky and with it for the first time. Full of energy and dare I say it he has a swagger in his walk, he's looking well cocky...especially as he seems to be now asserting himself with big brother!!! Perhaps the stress of asserting himself with an older established cat is making him suddenly more aggressive towards me too. I'm taking him to the vet's on friday for his booster vaccine and am going to get him checked out at the same time, as I want to know the score from his past accident. The shelter knew nothing at all, but it'd be reassuring to talk to the vet directly.

People think Maine coons are push overs, but my 14yo Louis wasn't always so - now he's a big baby towards me and lets me do anything with him. But, I remember him as a youngster being very high spirited and occasionally bad tempered, and me having to teach him not to use the claws. It took a long while for him to settle down, but luckily he bonded extremely quickly with me, so I knew even that when I told him off he knew it was alright, he was safe. I don't get that sense with Rory, I've got a long way to go to get his full trust and bonding.

Yeah I agree, we need to establish boundaries from the beginning, so will need to try various methods...I do the going back after a while to have a quick stroke to say "Look we're still friends". I'm heaping lots of praise on him and trying to reassure him as much as I can when he's good.

Looks like I'll have a job on my hands with this one!
Heather x

Love your avatar - is that Rory or Louis?

Here is 'devil hell kitten' with her Uncle Finn -
Sounds like it's going to be a long haul with Rory but I think you'll get there - commiserations to Louis but he sounds like a tough guy; fusses to them both and all the very best

I can see the cattitude in her, a little madam Uncle Finn looks like a sweet old man.

The avatar is Rory, missing half his fur. I've just been reading up on long fur care and I need to try some different brushes and combs with him. Plus I saw a long hair detangler for cats which I need to try to reduce our stress, as his ruff fur seems to knot within mins. If I can get his fur in a better state perhaps that will ease his stress. Louis has long fur too, but it's like silk so only needs doing once in a blue moon to help it out.

Hello Heather have just read your post. My Crystal, Himalayan Siamese used to suffer from matted/knotted fur & I used to get her shaved for summer. This also assisted her comfort levels in our hot summers. Don't know if shaving is an option. I do need to say she used to be most indignant with her fur gone as she was somewhat of a beauty & knew it (What have you done to me!) Vivian