Our old gal was finally diagnosed with a brain tumour

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Rukia
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Our old gal was finally diagnosed with a brain tumour

Post by Rukia »

Good morning all,

First time posting so apologies if this should be in another section.

We took our old girl K (Ragdoll >13 years F) to the vets as she had been struggling with various comorbidities. The vet who is fabulous noticed that K was twitching and not reacting to sound and performed a number of tests which demonstrated she was having a seizure and her pupils were off. We were told she has a brain tumour which is inoperable so we've started her on steroids but it's likely she won't make it to Christmas.
My son lost his father recently and K has been his support and I'm torn as I know we'll have to do what's right when the time comes. My son is devastated but wants to be there when she passes. Has anyone experience of the process and would it be right to let my son see her pass away?

Thanks for reading,

R
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fjm
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Re: Our old gal was finally diagnosed with a brain tumour

Post by fjm »

I am so sorry - it is always so hard to say goodbye to an old friend. How old is your son? My experience of having animals put to sleep has always been very gentle and reassuring, with kind vets and an easy, peaceful slipping away, but I know others have sometimes had very bad experiences. Even when all goes smoothly the final tests can be a bit upsetting, but you could ask your vet to save those until your son is not in the room. I think it depends very much on how much you trust your vet to manage things with kindness and sympathy, and on the age and maturity of your son - it may well be that seeing for himself how painless the process is brings him comfort, but handled badly it could be traumatic.
Rukia
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Re: Our old gal was finally diagnosed with a brain tumour

Post by Rukia »

Many thanks for your response. Our vet has been very kind and stated they would do everything to make things as comfortable/gentle as possible. We'll keep K comfortable for now and take each day as it comes. We're still in shock as her deterioration started so quickly.
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Mollycat
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Re: Our old gal was finally diagnosed with a brain tumour

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I am sorry, and wish you all kindness and gentleness for her through her ninth life. In my personal experience it has always been an intensely sad moment but very peaceful for the cat and 3 out of 4 vets have been brilliant, even offering to let me pay later if I just needed to get out of there. Your vet sounds lovely.

There are just a couple of things it helps to be aware of and prepared for, especially for your son. Cats' eyes don't close when they pass and you can't close them. They don't have an eyelid as such and it takes effort for a cat to close its eyes, so as everything relaxes the pupil dilates into saucer eyes and they remain open, but you can see the light of life is gone and they look glazed. Apart from that the cat will look asleep. Second, very often they give a little cough which startles you which my vet says still makes her jump every time. It's just a muscle spasm as the body shuts down. Those are the things I wish someone had told me. Many vets now will take the cat out the back to shave a patch of fur and put a canula in place in the front leg for the injection. Some will do a home visit for euthanasia rather than have you come into the surgery.

They will also ask you if you want individual cremation and the ashes back, or to take the body home for burial in your garden, or to leave her there for them to dispose of respectfully. It pays to discuss this as a family beforehand, obviously, so that you know what you all agree to do. If you do bring her home for burial, be aware that the body lets go of anything left in the bladder and digestive system, so a small towel or blanket that can be thrown away is a good precaution and you may want to keep the body wrapped up or wipe her back end before a burial with your son.

My personal view is that children should be involved, especially if they want to be. Death is a natural part of life and trying to overprotect them can create fear and difficulties later in life, not just with death but even with simple goodbyes.
Rukia
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Re: Our old gal was finally diagnosed with a brain tumour

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Firstly I'd like to say thanks to the people who posted as it was a very highly emotional situation and it was hard to see the forest for the trees.

Our lass was PTS last Friday as she deteriorated rapidly and her quality of life was non-existent. Our vet was very calm and kind and sedated K before the final injection which let her drift off peacefully. My son stayed with K and I throughout the process and stroked her whilst she purred to her final breath.

I'm glad that my son and I were with her to the last moment despite how hard it was emotionally we would never let her be alone in her final moments.
Rukia
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Re: Our old gal was finally diagnosed with a brain tumour

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Also, we've requested that her ashes be returned to us so my son can light a stick of incense for her in memory of the fabulous life she lived.
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fjm
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Re: Our old gal was finally diagnosed with a brain tumour

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I am so sorry, it is never a good time for that last, sad goodbye. I too am glad that you were able to be with her, and that her last moments were peaceful and pain free, held in your love.
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Mollycat
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Re: Our old gal was finally diagnosed with a brain tumour

Post by Mollycat »

So sorry for your loss, it is never easy no matter how right the decision.

I am so glad your son was able to be part of it right to the end, and that his first experience was able to be beautiful, peaceful and gentle, and to see himself what we mean by a kind release. Gentle thoughts are with you.
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