Cat Chat Feline Forum

In august i posted how my cat was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer.I'm updating to try get this off my chest and need to be doing something i guess. Flash my lovely cat picked up after his diagnosis and was eating really well although being sick every other day.his behaviour changed a little as he wanted to sit in the hallway outside the front room instead of coming on settee with me.I'd carry him on the settee with me and he'd stay an hour but then revert to the hallway. Anyway last week although still eating well i new he was getting thinner so weighed him and got a harsh reality check so i weighed him each day to find he was looseing 1-2 ounces a day.I don't have to do the maths to know what he'll be like in a week or two with im sure more severe problems.I forced myself saturday to phone a home visit for Monday.He's asleep in the hallway now so i feel hes not in to much distress and as usuall he ate his food.I've been giving him CBD oil for pain relief and stress but does it work who knows.Someone on my first thread said i'll know when its time and they were right as he spent a few minutes meowing at me yesterday and it broke my heart as i cuddled him and made that call before i talked myself out of it. i'm not going to say how hard this is for me because as many of you know it's almost an impossible decision to make.Even last night he wanted a wee so opened front door and he wandered off for 30 mins. I feel theres still life in him the way he acts but i cant give it any longer knowing the consequences.Anyway he will go to rainbow ridge monday and believe me its killing me. Since i weighed him i can hardly eat myself knowing the end was very close.You feel guilty because you cant cure them and feel helpless.

It is such a hard decision, but it does sound as if you know it is time. Things can only get worse for him and you can spare him so much by acting now. I will be thinking of you today, and tomorrow.

Thanks i feel anxious and nervous at the moment the house will feel dead without him.

My thoughts are with you...

Thinking of you today. When we have given them all we can the day comes when we have nothing left to give but the greatest gift of all, to let them go in peace and free from pain and sickness, to let them sleep and keep them forever safe in our heart.

Thankyou for your kind thoughts i have just let my beautiful boy go i feel sick in the pit of my stomach.I had him about 11 years and he was 5ish when i got him and i've loved every second of his company.i let him go at home and the young man that did it was compassionate and made it as easy as he could.Flash has been my one and only cat and i don't think i could go through this again. I salute you lovely people who have had' many cats over the years because it shows your love for them triumphs over your grief.I'm just numb,empty and lost.You never feel lonely with a cat in the house and now that's exactly how i feel. Flash gave me all his love and is there any better feeling of being snuggled up with your cat at night i don't know of one.Who will wake me up in a morning now he gave me the reason to get up.

Be kind to yourself - grief is a physical as well as emotional pain, and everyone's journey through it is different. You shared 11 wonderful years with Flash, and when he faced a slow and painful death you found the courage to help him slip swiftly and peacefully away - or as far away as he will ever be. It may be our minds playing tricks, but many of us have felt the comforting weight of a cat on the bed long after we have said goodbye...

I think most of us have been there feeling never again, and yet one day when the pain subsides enough and a little whiskered face needs help we somehow end up falling in love all over again. For some that may be days, for others it can be years, but that doesn't matter right now. Grief is a healing process, a journey, and if you let it do its work it will help you grow to love even deeper. What you have done for Flash, this gift you have given him to set him free, is already a huge selfless act of love, a sacrifice of your wish to keep him here forever at all costs to put his needs above yours.

The first morning is the hardest, and there will be more hard mornings, but it is your first hours on a long healing and growing journey that does, in small steps, with setbacks, get easier.

I've been doing little things today like shoveling leaves of garden but it still doesn't leave your mind. I'm at peace with my decision but was all the more difficult because he was eating so well which patients don't usually do with pancreatic cancer and i think this definetly gave me another month or two with him. When i told the vet how old he was he said he didnt look like an older cat. Since he was diagnosed i read many post on here and youtube and anywhere really maybe looking for something to help me make the decision.In some ways i wished i hadn't because i despaired to read how their cat or dog woke up with something trivial like a cough or something only to find out its something more sinister. It's happening in so many young animals to who are on all sorts of medication. It saddens me and i despair at where it all comes from and i genuinely feel for all these loving people who worry well their cat is on a long term medication for a condition it scares me it really does. I know many believe they will be reunited with their feline friend one day and i truly hope it's true it would make this easier knowing we will be together again. Thankyou to yourself and FJM for your kind words of sympathy and encouragement its nice to know someone who has been through it is rooting for you.

I don't believe in an after life, but I still feel the presence of my rainbow cats in my house and garden. It hurts a lot to feel a presence which is not there any longer in the early days of loss, but it becomes a source of comfort and even pleasure eventually to be able to picture him in a favourite spot on the outdoor cat tree, or remember how much she loved climbing on top of the wall cupboards . A home which no longer has a much loved cat is still a much happier place than a home which has never known a cat,.