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Kitten died, advice on how to help 6 year old daughter cope?
Posted: Tue Mar 24, 2015 9:49 am
by karuski
Hi there,
We had a litter of four kittens last week, but sadly one of them passed away this morning. He was my daughter's favourite and she's understandably very very upset by his passing.
I am speaking to the vet to find out if there is any risk for the other 3, but I've also read up that fading kittens is unfortunately a very common occurrence. I have explained this to her, as she was worried he has been killed.
I think I want to organise a little funeral for her little kitten, but somehow this seems not to be a very popular subject on the internet - I would like to have a nice poem that would be suitable for her to read - I am aware of the rainbow bridge, which I think she would like.
Any advice would be most welcome - she is very sad, but in truth so am I.
Re: Kitten died, advice on how to help 6 year old daughter c
Posted: Tue Mar 24, 2015 10:01 am
by bobbys girl
Hello karuski,
I'm so sorry for your loss. Just the quickest of notes - I have a hospital appointment. I know this has just happened and it is all still fresh for your little girl. Please don't think we don't care if you don't hear straight away. But I KNOW there are folks here with ideas and advice and poems. Just hang in there.
Sorry I have to rush.
Re: Kitten died, advice on how to help 6 year old daughter c
Posted: Tue Mar 24, 2015 10:11 am
by karuski
Thanks bobby's girl - I turned to catchat because I know what an amazing community this is, how caring and understanding - you have helped me in the past with one of my other cats, so I know people here are lovely and helpful. Your message alone shows that clearly. Thank you...
Re: Kitten died, advice on how to help 6 year old daughter c
Posted: Tue Mar 24, 2015 11:19 am
by JulieandBarney
Hi Karuski,
When we lost our boy CC, I liked to believe that his spirit was still with us...I found this poem out, which almost summed up how I felt....it does ease with time, but the memories never fade, it may help your little girl feel better....xx
I stood by your bed last night
I came to have a peep.
I could see that you were crying,
You found it hard to sleep.
I meowed to you softly
as you brushed away a tear,
"It's me, I haven't left you,
I'm well, I'm fine, I'm here."
I was close to you at breakfast,
I watched you pour the tea,
You were thinking of the many times,
your hands reached down to me.
I was with you at the shops today,
Your arms were getting sore.
I longed to take your parcels,
I wish I could do more.
I was with you at my grave today,
You tend it with such care.
I want to reassure you,
that I'm not lying there.
I walked with you towards the house,
as you fumbled for your key.
I gently put my paw on you,
I smiled and said "it's me."
You looked so very tired,
and sank into a chair.
I tried so hard to let you know,
that I was standing there.
It's possible for me,
to be so near you everyday.
To say to you with certainty,
"I never went away."
You sat there very quietly,
then smiled, I think you knew
... in the stillness of that evening,
I was very close to you.
The day is over...
smile and watch you yawning
and say "goodnight, God bless,
I'll see you in the morning."
And when the time is right for you
to cross the brief divide,
I'll rush across to greet you
and we'll stand, side by side.
I have so many things to show you,
there is so much for you to see.
Be patient, live your journey out
...then come home to be with me.
Re: Kitten died, advice on how to help 6 year old daughter c
Posted: Tue Mar 24, 2015 12:10 pm
by karuski
Hi Julie,
Thank you for the poem, it is really lovely and still teary from it.
I've adapted it so we can read it tonight with my daughter, and make it relate more to her daily life.
You have really been very helpful, thank you...
Re: Kitten died, advice on how to help 6 year old daughter c
Posted: Tue Mar 24, 2015 12:56 pm
by JulieandBarney
Hi Karuski,
You are welcome, its early days yet for you all, it is so painful for children to accept the death of a pet at any age.
I am sure Michelle08 won't mind me quoting her words below when she had the same problem with her little boy and I shared the same poem.
"The poem is beautiful & I'll read it to my son when he gets sad..I tell him she is by his side. Thankyou again for sharing your lovely cat CCs sad passing with me xxx"
Re: Kitten died, advice on how to help 6 year old daughter c
Posted: Tue Mar 24, 2015 3:11 pm
by Crewella
I'm so sorry, it's such a shock to lose a kitten, so young. (((hugs)))
I don't know if this poen would be suitable?
JUST A CAT
From time to time, people tell me, "lighten up, it's just a cat,"
or "that's a lot of money for just a cat."
They don't understand the distance travelled, the time spent,
or the costs involved for "just a cat."
Some of my proudest moments have come about with "just a cat."
Many hours have passed and my only company was "just a cat,"
but I did not once feel slighted.
Some of my saddest moments have been brought about by
"just a cat," and in those days of darkness, the gentle touch
of "just a cat" gave me comfort and reason to overcome the day.
If you, too, think it's "just a cat," then you probably understand
phrases like "just a friend," "just a sunrise," or "just a promise."
"Just a cat" brings into my life the very essence of friendship,
trust, and pure unbridled joy.
"Just a cat" brings out the compassion and patience
that make me a better person.
Because of "just a cat" I will rise early, take long walks and look
longingly to the future.
So for me and folks like me, it's not "just a cat"
but an embodiment of all the hopes and dreams of the future,
the fond memories of the past, and the pure joy of the moment.
"Just a cat" brings out what's good in me and diverts my thoughts
away from myself and the worries of the day.
I hope that someday they can understand that its' not "just a cat"
but the thing that gives me humanity and keeps me from being
"just a man" or "just a woman."
So the next time you hear the phrase "just a cat,"
just smile,
because they "just don't understand."
Re: Kitten died, advice on how to help 6 year old daughter c
Posted: Tue Mar 24, 2015 3:12 pm
by Crewella
There is a sitethat has lots of poems for pet loss:
http://www.74ghia.com/cats/html/poems.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
Re: Kitten died, advice on how to help 6 year old daughter c
Posted: Tue Mar 24, 2015 3:20 pm
by SarahT1 [PLLE]
Those are beautiful poems. I am so glad that you are doing this for your daughter and the little one who has gone to the Bridge. If only more people were as sensitive and loving. Fortunately the vast majority of folk on here understand only too well how painful it is when we lose our little ones, especially such a premature and unexpected passing. I know that when the time comes for me to face sadness this will be the first place that I will turn, and to the friends I have made through the forum. The little one will be your daughter's guardian angel I am sure. ((hugs)) to you all.
Re: Kitten died, advice on how to help 6 year old daughter c
Posted: Tue Mar 24, 2015 6:17 pm
by bobbys girl
Hi, it's me again, I'm back!
It was Julie's poem that I was thinking of. I can never read it without welling up, but it is so true and a lovely poem.
I hope the other kittens are OK. Perhaps looking after them will help your little girl, as will having a special funeral service for the kitten.
I will be thinking of you tonight.
Sue.
Re: Kitten died, advice on how to help 6 year old daughter c
Posted: Tue Mar 24, 2015 10:44 pm
by Walesgang
I must admit, it's easy to see how Julie's poem can be adapted to most situations.
I have seen it before (Julie has been very generous in sharing it), but I have imagined how you might adapt it for your daughter has really hit home it's poiniouncy. It's such a powerful poem.
We think of you, your little girl, the poor kitty who didn't make it and the ones who are still alive xx