Grief

Help & Support for those who have lost a beloved cat
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Scud999
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Joined: Sat Oct 22, 2016 3:53 pm

Grief

Post by Scud999 »

Hi this is the first time I have written in forum so please forgive me if it's not good.
I am so heartbroken about 5 weeks ago my ginger cat scud went out and never came back we looked every were for him.i went out every night calling for him. On Friday I got so bad new a farmer found him he had been trapped in a shed and was found underneath auger. I am so heartbroken I know I have got closer and I know that I wanted to know what has happened to him. But I feel so guilty that I did not find him sooner I looked around the farm and the farmer looked around for him. He was only 4 years old I can't cope with it all he was my rock I been in tears ever day since he dissappear.i keep expecting him to be crying at the door to come in I wish I didn't let him out on that day he dissappear.i am sorry if this does not make any sense I just need to write it down somewhere
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bobbys girl
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No. of cats in household: 5
Location: Co. Fermanagh

Re: Grief

Post by bobbys girl »

I am so sorry to hear about Scud, how heartbreaking for you.

I have had two cats just vanish without trace (though we think one may have just gone 'home') and another who we found, dead, three days after his disappearance. You can punish yourself for something you feel you had control over or there is always the 'what if's'. many of us have been there and none of it helps.

As you say, you at least have some closure and you can allow yourself to grieve. It sounds like he had a very good life with you and that thought should give you a little comfort. We are here for you.

RIP Scud, much-missed little boy.
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Mayday21
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Re: Grief

Post by Mayday21 »

Hello at the moment you can't see your way thru your pain. All I can say Bobby's Girl has summed up. People here understand all what you're going through & will experience for a while. Rest assured words of support will help you. Post at any time. Did you bring him home? RIP little Scud. Take care. Vivian
Last edited by Mayday21 on Mon Dec 05, 2016 8:04 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Ruth B
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Re: Grief

Post by Ruth B »

Welcome to the forum and I am so sorry it isn't in better circumstances.

What you are saying makes perfect sense and wanting to write it down perfectly normal, everyone here will understand and many have been through similar experiences.

All I can do is back up what Bobby's Girl and Mayday have said, the pain and guilt is all part of the natural grieving process, and eventually the good memories will overshadow the bad.

I worry every time mine go out the cat flap, but then I only have to watch them outside to see the joy that being out brings them and I know that the worry and pain is more than worth the price to see them so happy, and for the happiness they bring me.

RIP little Scud, and please keep telling yourself that you did everything you could, what happened wasn't your fault.
Scud999
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Re: Grief

Post by Scud999 »

Thank you for your replies and kind words, I picked him up today from the vet's as we had him cremated. we are going to place him in the garden next to our other cats that we have lost,I am hoping that this grief and pain and the feeling of guilt will gradually faded and I will be able to bring other cat into my life.
Rest in peace my little fur ball I will miss so much :cry:
catly254
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Re: Grief

Post by catly254 »

So sorry for your loss, all will be well.
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