Cat Chat Feline Forum

I lost my beautiful girl Millie on Friday, I had her as a rescue cat for thirteen and a half years, she was such a gentle and loving cat the sweetest girl you could wish to meet. It turned out she had a tumor in her chest and I had to have her put to sleep. For the last five hours of her life she was in the local vets and I feel so guilty that maybe she thought I had abandoned her. I just cant stop crying and wish I had been firmer with the vets in question and made her last hours easier on her x

dealing with hindsight and the guilt it brings is so often an extra burden when we lose those we love, be they animal or human - but she might have died in agony in your arms on the way to the vet, or you might have got up one morning to find her gone - you were doing what you thought was best, and you gave her a peaceful passing - there is no more any of us can do

being able to move on from thinking only of the end of Millie's life to remembering all the good times when she was still with you will come with time

I am so sorry to here about Millie. I agree with all Kay has said. It is never easy to lose one of these special creatures. But you did the right thing and should take comfort from that. RIP little Millie, 'til we meet agian.

I am so sorry to read about Millie, but as the others have said we can only do what we think is right at the time. Hindsight will always make us wonder if there was some thing we could have done better, but if possible try not to agonise over it, you have no reason to feel guilty, but I know it is something easier said than done.

Try and concentrate on the thirteen and a half wonderful years you gave her and all the good times you had together. Eventually those good memories will start to overshadow the bad ones and you will find you can start to smile again at the memory of all the silly little things she used to do and the good times you had together.

Thank you all for your kind comments, she was a lovely little girl who saw both my daughters grow up and the addition of two granddaughters to the family. She was more than a cat to me she was a little person, at this time the pain seems physical its that strong but the pleasure she gave me all those years without doubt outweighs it.

Miss Kitty all I'll say has been already been posted. Everyone who posts understands everything you're going through. Take care & take comfort you didn't let your Millie suffer. RIP Millie you were very much loved. (((Hugs))) Vivian

Thanks for those kind words Vivian, its nice to know that people do understand the depth of the loss that you feel and that not everyone has the attitude of she was just a cat you can always get another.

Hi Miss Kitty you'll probably find when the times right, another fur babe will find a place in your heart - not Millie's spot. As for people who say 'only a cat ...' I lost my best friend when her husband told me in no uncertain way to get over Mayday... I found this forum just after and the support I received was incredible.and just before Xmas which I used to spend with them. Now I've a new circle of friends through my involvement with Little Paws Kitten Rescue. Perhaps you could consider something like this when the time is right for you. I also read a lot on Buddhism which also helped me cope with my feelings of grief. I lost my mum in 2014 & Mayday was my last constant 21 yrs 7 mths. I felt like my heart had been ripped out & then I lost a friendship. But one door closes & another one opens. Take care. Vivian

I am so very sorry to hear of the loss of Millie. My beloved cat Armand, also died unexpectedly at the Vets earlier this year, a tumour in his chest, fluid in the lungs and yes, it is a physical pain, hurts like hell but hang on in their honey, I promise you, the raw grief does ease and life goes on. I won't lie, I lost my Cody 4 weeks later and I still miss them both 8 months on, but when you love, you inevitably grieve, then slowly but surely, memories raise a smile and not a tear.

Warm hugs to you and your family

Issi

Mayday21 wrote:Hi Miss Kitty you'll probably find when the times right, another fur babe will find a place in your heart - not Millie's spot. As for people who say 'only a cat ...' I lost my best friend when her husband told me in no uncertain way to get over Mayday... I found this forum just after and the support I received was incredible.and just before Xmas which I used to spend with them. Now I've a new circle of friends through my involvement with Little Paws Kitten Rescue. Perhaps you could consider something like this when the time is right for you. I also read a lot on Buddhism which also helped me cope with my feelings of grief. I lost my mum in 2014 & Mayday was my last constant 21 yrs 7 mths. I felt like my heart had been ripped out & then I lost a friendship. But one door closes & another one opens. Take care. Vivian

Oh Vivian, you should have told him to 'spin on it'. Men are odd when it comes to a show of emotion, it's a shame you lost a much valued friendship because of a crass remark. It's encouraging to me that you have moved on, I too have closed a door, in the process of prising open a new one and who knows what lies behind it?

Much love
Issi

Im so sorry about Mayday Vivian, thanks for your good advice, I still have a cat, a big tabby called Gracie who found me as a stray thirteen years ago, poor thing is also missing Millie so Im trying to comfort her. thanks Issi for your comments and hugs Im so sorry about Armand and Cody that must have be so painful for you. Millie passed away exactly the same way as Armand its been such a shock but Im trying my best to remember happy times with her.