The right thing to do

Help & Support for those who have lost a beloved cat
Post Reply
User avatar
Julie67
Frequent Cat Chatter
Posts: 24
Joined: Sat Nov 24, 2018 10:03 am
No. of cats in household: 0
Location: East Midlands

The right thing to do

Post by Julie67 » Sat Nov 24, 2018 10:47 am

Hi, sorry for the long post,

I took my beautiful 16 year old Onion to the vets yesterday after finding a lump in her abdomen. If I hadn't found this, I would never have suspected that anything was wrong, other than a bit of constipation. A scan revealed that she has cancer that has spread to her kidney and liver, and possibly spleen, I was numb and couldn't take in all what the vet was telling me. I was expecting the worst, but I didn't think it would be this bad. As she was comfortable, and eating well and keeping herself clean, he advised me to take her home for the weekend, for a chance to say goodbye, which I have done.
As soon as she wobbled out of the carrier, she went to the kitchen demanding food, but I left it a couple of hours for the sedative to wear off. After that she had her lunch, ate all but a few scraps. She was quiet the whole day so I stayed up with her through the night. I vowed that if she didn't eat the following day I was going to take her back to the vet (she's always been a greedy girl, and NEVER been off her food, so I was going to use this as a guide). Around 6am this morning, she got up, ate a few leftover morsels in her dish and promptly demanded more. After that she pooped, wandered into the living room, used her scratching post, had a wash and settled in front of the fire. This sweet natured little girl is now asleep and I'm going crazy with anguish. She's still very quiet and seems a bit frail, even though she's still eating etc. She doesn't seem to be in any discomfort and I don't know what to do. I know too soon is better than too late, but I don't want to rob her of a few more days of food and affection, her two favourite things. I don't know what to do for the best. I HAVE to get this right for her, otherwise it will haunt me all my days. I love my baby girl to distraction, and the thought of her having this unspeakable thing inside her, ticking away like a time bomb, is almost unbearable. I feel like we're in limbo. Should I keep an eye on her and see how she goes? The vet is only a five minute walk away.

Thank you.

User avatar
Lilith
VIP Cat Chatter!
Posts: 3621
Joined: Sat Dec 20, 2014 8:00 pm
No. of cats in household: 3
Location: West Yorks

Re: The right thing to do

Post by Lilith » Sat Nov 24, 2018 11:28 am

Hi Julie and welcome, though I'm sorry to hear about Onion.

I think you're doing the right thing, playing it by ear.

Last August my Emily (avatar cat) left me after being diagnosed with kidney disease in the previous February. The day before she deteriorated she was lively and demanding, ate three :o lunches and was generally her naughty and greedy self ... in the early hours of the following day she slept and slept instead of wanting food and cuddles and I knew then that the decision had to be made ... she was very subdued and off her food in the late morning and the vet (like yours, my vet is close at hand) kindly agreed to make a home visit.

I think you will know when it's time, as you're clearly so close to Onion. Hugs to you and fusses to her, lots of love and please keep in touch with the forum, Lil x

User avatar
Ruth B
VIP Cat Chatter!
Posts: 1262
Joined: Wed Jun 15, 2016 11:31 am
No. of cats in household: 3
Location: Wolverhampton

Re: The right thing to do

Post by Ruth B » Sat Nov 24, 2018 12:10 pm

Welcome to the forum, I'm just sorry it is under such circumstances.

It is the hardest time of all, knowing something is wrong and trying to work out when is the right time to act.

I've been through it a few times now and the best you can do is to watch and try and judge what they are telling you.

Sometimes it is obvious, they go off their food and the light just goes from their eyes, other times you have to make the decision based on other factors. I adopted my Mother's elderly cat at the start of this year when my Mother had to move to a nursing home and subsequently died herself in the Spring. By August Stroppy was losing weigh even though she was eating anything put in front of her, something was wrong but it wasn't obvious what. She was the hardest call I have had to make, but I couldn't bring her home knowing she would just waste away, it was kinder to give her the release at the time rather than prolong it.

All I can advise is that if she is happy, eating and drinking, and not losing condition and her ability to do what she wants, then let her go on for as long as she seems to want to. Hopefully when the time comes she will let you know she has had enough.

User avatar
Julie67
Frequent Cat Chatter
Posts: 24
Joined: Sat Nov 24, 2018 10:03 am
No. of cats in household: 0
Location: East Midlands

Re: The right thing to do

Post by Julie67 » Sat Nov 24, 2018 3:31 pm

I just found a video on my computer of my baby getting fussed. My God, she was so solid and beautiful, with such sleek shiny fur. I can hear her sweet meows and her chirps when I say 'treat'. She hooks my hand with her paw and guides it to her head for an ear scratch. My poor heart is breaking, and my face is sore with tears, but I am so glad I found this.

User avatar
Julie67
Frequent Cat Chatter
Posts: 24
Joined: Sat Nov 24, 2018 10:03 am
No. of cats in household: 0
Location: East Midlands

Re: The right thing to do

Post by Julie67 » Sat Nov 24, 2018 5:01 pm

Lilith wrote:Hi Julie and welcome, though I'm sorry to hear about Onion.

I think you're doing the right thing, playing it by ear.

Last August my Emily (avatar cat) left me after being diagnosed with kidney disease in the previous February. The day before she deteriorated she was lively and demanding, ate three :o lunches and was generally her naughty and greedy self ... in the early hours of the following day she slept and slept instead of wanting food and cuddles and I knew then that the decision had to be made ... she was very subdued and off her food in the late morning and the vet (like yours, my vet is close at hand) kindly agreed to make a home visit.

I think you will know when it's time, as you're clearly so close to Onion. Hugs to you and fusses to her, lots of love and please keep in touch with the forum, Lil x
Thank you Lil, you've put my mind at rest. It's terrifying how fast they can deteriorate, isn't it? Currently, she's fed, washed and stretched out warm and snoozing, with the occasional snore. Her breathing is deep and steady. I'm going to count that as a good day. She's the beautiful Tuxedo girl in my avatar, looking a bit like a news reader... x
Oh, now she's woken up and squeezed herself next to me on the sofa. Which means when I get up, she'll nick my warm spot, and I'll be perched up the other end on the cold bit....

User avatar
Julie67
Frequent Cat Chatter
Posts: 24
Joined: Sat Nov 24, 2018 10:03 am
No. of cats in household: 0
Location: East Midlands

Re: The right thing to do

Post by Julie67 » Sat Nov 24, 2018 5:23 pm

Ruth B wrote:Welcome to the forum, I'm just sorry it is under such circumstances.

It is the hardest time of all, knowing something is wrong and trying to work out when is the right time to act.

I've been through it a few times now and the best you can do is to watch and try and judge what they are telling you.

Sometimes it is obvious, they go off their food and the light just goes from their eyes, other times you have to make the decision based on other factors. I adopted my Mother's elderly cat at the start of this year when my Mother had to move to a nursing home and subsequently died herself in the Spring. By August Stroppy was losing weigh even though she was eating anything put in front of her, something was wrong but it wasn't obvious what. She was the hardest call I have had to make, but I couldn't bring her home knowing she would just waste away, it was kinder to give her the release at the time rather than prolong it.

All I can advise is that if she is happy, eating and drinking, and not losing condition and her ability to do what she wants, then let her go on for as long as she seems to want to. Hopefully when the time comes she will let you know she has had enough.
Thank you Ruth. They're hard-won lessons to pass on, aren't they?

User avatar
Lilith
VIP Cat Chatter!
Posts: 3621
Joined: Sat Dec 20, 2014 8:00 pm
No. of cats in household: 3
Location: West Yorks

Re: The right thing to do

Post by Lilith » Sat Nov 24, 2018 10:11 pm

She is such a beautiful girl. Thinking of you both x

User avatar
Janey
VIP Cat Chatter!
Posts: 954
Joined: Tue Mar 04, 2014 1:04 pm
No. of cats in household: 1

Re: The right thing to do

Post by Janey » Sun Nov 25, 2018 2:07 pm

Julie67 wrote:Hi, sorry for the long post,

I took my beautiful 16 year old Onion to the vets yesterday after finding a lump in her abdomen. If I hadn't found this, I would never have suspected that anything was wrong, other than a bit of constipation. I feel like we're in limbo. Should I keep an eye on her and see how she goes? The vet is only a five minute walk away.

Thank you.
Hi Julie, so sorry to hear about Onion. Personally I think that if you wouldn’t have known anything was wrong then that’s a good sign, as is her eating and drinking etc. They say cats can hide illness well but I do think you can usually tell to some degree, and I think eating a drinking is always a good sign, we know ourselves that appetite is a big indicator of feeling poorly. Sending some hugs for you little Onion xx

Post Reply