Will I ever let go . ?

Help & Support for those who have lost a beloved cat
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Bertie 2017
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Joined: Thu Aug 30, 2018 8:24 pm
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Will I ever let go . ?

Post by Bertie 2017 »

Hi friends ,for those of you that knows ,I lost my dear Bertie ,just over two years ago ,
And it still seems ,I am feeling the pain of his loss ,I think about him 24/ 7 ,and wish so
Bad he was still here ,I watched a video of him today ,usually I don’t have any issues
With looking at pictures of him ,but the fact he was moving ,and being his cheeky little
Normal self ,set me off , I cannot seem to stop crying ,because of it ,I know I cannot
Turn back time ,and nothing I can do and say ,will bring Bertie back ,but that doesn’t
Stop me wishing I could have him back ,I feel I will never be my normal happy self,
Again ,it’s 3 years this November ,can anyone please help me ,and give me some advice ,
I just what too feel normal again ,and not be stuck in this circle forever ,
Letting go is easier said than done ,

Thanks x
Moochie
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Joined: Thu Mar 04, 2021 6:44 pm

Re: Will I ever let go . ?

Post by Moochie »

I am sorry nobody seems to have replied to you. I have only just joined Cat Chat. I am lost to know what to say. I lost my dearly beloved cat in January and am feeling all the things one feels when this happens, grief, guilt, regret etc. I wonder too how, if ever, one finds a way out, or if indeed there is a way out, or should be one. I wonder whether part of the being unable to let go, comes from knowing that if you move on you have lost that person and left them behind, so they will no longer be alive to you. And this way of keeping them alive is all we are left with.
issiandarchie+68
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Joined: Mon May 02, 2016 10:45 am

Re: Will I ever let go . ?

Post by issiandarchie+68 »

Hi Moochie. I am sorry you seem to have got the wrong impression as a newcomer to this forum, in thinking that no one has been kind enough to respond to Bertie. On closer inspection you will see it is an old post dated January 2020, which garnered lots of sympathetic and supportive responses, as have other posts since. Bertie's grief seems to be as overwhelmingly real and as raw as ever, which is heart breaking, but sadly there is no time limit on individual healing. But rest assured, support will always be found here, although responses may take a little longer in these Covid times..

There is no easy answer to your question, but the loss of your much loved pet was very recent and it is normal, if truly hellish that you are suffering all these emotions. The grief and gut wrenching pain will feel never ending, but it is, everything passes. I can't deny that occasionally you will be coping just fine when a memory will remind you of your life together, regrets overtake you but this will also pass. I have lost 4 cats since 2016, the last in September 2020 and many pets before that so I speak from experience. But you know what dear Moochie, there will come a time when you look at photographs, talk about your pet and smile! The good memories will return, the bad fade and you realise you are carrying your loved one in a corner of your heart, wrapped in a warm glow, only shedding a wee tear every now and then, missing your darling as you do any deceased loved one, animal or human. So take heart, you will always carry the happiness and goodness, the memories they gave you, as part of the whole you, enhancing your life. I promise you will never forget, or leave your adored wee pet behind.

Issi
Moochie
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Joined: Thu Mar 04, 2021 6:44 pm

Re: Will I ever let go . ?

Post by Moochie »

Hello Issi,

I am sorry for getting confused finding my way around the forum. I am glad nobody was left alone in their grief.

I am truly grateful for your response to my post. My cat was 16.5 and it feels the world is full of people whose cats lived so much longer than mine. I feel robbed, and that she was taken away before her time. What did she and I do to deserve this. To be parted when our bond was so precious. I called her my guardian angel.

Thank you for your reassurance that our bond will continue, and I won't lose her as a result of time creating increasing distance between us. It is a source of anguish to think what we have left - our strong feelings of love and out memories- will also be stolen.

The beautiful things we have in life are dashed and gone. What a hopeless situation it all feels, what a mess.
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