Desperately need another option...
Posted: Mon Sep 05, 2022 1:27 am
Hey, new here. Sorry for making a new thread that im sure has been made hundreds of times... But lines have been crossed and if i cant find a solution then the only option i can see is rehoming. Ive cried thinking about it for several hours now because i really dont want to see him go as hes kind of all i have right now. He recently peed on my pillow and all across my bed for the first time, and then the second time as soon as i had the bed put back together again. Im bad about rambling so im just going to present facts in an effort to not write a novel (Edit: Its still a novel)
Medical Notes
- Got him from a friend who's outdoor cat had a litter, took him home at 2 months old and he is now pushing 3 and a half years old, neutered
- He is on Urinary SO food for crystals in his urine. Also has had several urinary infections before, tho theyve gotten much less frequent as time goes on
- Vets say he has Idiopathic Cystitis, which i understand to more or less mean he gets an upset bladder when hes stressed and it can cause him to choose different places to pee
- Ever since he was maybe 6 months old or so we've had on going issues with him peeing outside of the box (he has two) on soft stuff like couches, laundry piles, etc... but never any issue with carpets or beds (except for his and the dog's beds)
- I would not say that hes been spraying, as often times this is a full bladder release type situation
Living situations
- When we got him, I had 5 roommates and one of them had a dog who was only a few years old
- We've had to relocate roughly 4 times since we got him due to many life changes, though he always seemed to adjust within in a few days and was comfortable and happy within a couple weeks
- Currently I still live with the roommate who had the dog (lets call them B), as well as the dog. The cat and dog have always gotten along well and wrestle/play fairly often
- Im looking to move out on my own in the next year or so. B has a new significant other who is over a lot (lets call him T), and while the cat doesnt seem stressed by his presence, Im beginning to wonder if maybe he is. Hes been over more and more lately, and up until the last month or so the cat has been really good about not peeing anywhere wierd (at least a few weeks between incidences)
I really want to see if its just an issue of the other people stressing him out, but the only viable way i can do that is by moving out into my own place which is ALMOST financially possible, but i need a couple more months at least to be confident. There was a week or so when B took the dog on a trip a while before T was even a thing, leaving just me and the cat alone. He was super affectionate during that time and always wanted to be pet, was always purring and was almost a little clingy. This wasnt really uncharacteristic, but it was all to a slightly higher degree than normal. When they got back he did the whole arched back thing and was extremely wary at first, and took a full day to really relax around them, but he went back to normal. It was just his initial reaction that has me wondering.
Since then, B and T have gotten more serious and he spends the night more often. The cat is fine around him, doesnt hide or anything and lets him pet him, but ive noticed the cat asking me for attention less and being less clingy, and weve noticed an increase in frequency of him peeing on stuff. Recently, he peed on a pair of shorts i had on the floor, which has been a daily habit of mine for years and rarely has he peed on them. He did it while i was at work, i switched to a new pair when i got home, and when i woke up they were peed on. Took him to the vet to rule out an infection and 2 days later i accidentally left the shorts on the floor again when i left for 20 minutes. Came back, and they were peed on. I dont leave them there anymore since its clearly an issue, but im sure if i forget even once theyll get peed on. Then just 3 days ago while i was in my room playing games on my computer, he completely unloaded his bladder on my pillow and across my bed. That was the first time he had ever done that, and it was the first time i thought to myself "I might ACTUALLY have to get rid of him if he starts hitting beds now." Luckily i had a protector on it. I immediately went online and overnighted some calming pheromone collars because the vet had said something about trying them when i last took him in. He seemed very different after i put it on, but he was definitely seeming pretty calm. Quieter and i havent seen the zoomies once when it was normally like every other day. He is much lower energy and while i did expect it, it makes me a little wary because he just seems off.
While everything was getting washed i flipped the mattress against the wall when i wasnt using it since there was no protector or anything on it. Put it back together last night and decided i had to test it, so i left it down today while i was at work. All day i just had this feeling that i was gonna come home to a wet pillow even tho he seemed like he wasnt stressed at all. About 5 or 6 hours after i had left the house, i got a call from my roommate saying he did it again. I ended up leaving work early because it was slow and i was really messed up about the whole situation. Started tearing up pretty much the moment i got on the road because ive done everything i can think of to try and stop this before i couldnt handle it anymore. But its getting to that point. Im always stressed and worried that were going to find a new spot hes peed, and he has ruined a lot of furniture, none of which was mine. I love him so much but hes causing so much stress and a lot of damage, I dont know how much more i can handle. I just hate the idea of rehoming because it feels like im giving up on him, and i know hes going to be so scared and confused and Im starting to cry again just typing this. I dont know what else to do and giving him up is the very last option, but im having a hard time finding any other options. Im planning to call the vet and maybe a rescue/shelter to ask for any final things i can try, but i think im losing hope at this point
Medical Notes
- Got him from a friend who's outdoor cat had a litter, took him home at 2 months old and he is now pushing 3 and a half years old, neutered
- He is on Urinary SO food for crystals in his urine. Also has had several urinary infections before, tho theyve gotten much less frequent as time goes on
- Vets say he has Idiopathic Cystitis, which i understand to more or less mean he gets an upset bladder when hes stressed and it can cause him to choose different places to pee
- Ever since he was maybe 6 months old or so we've had on going issues with him peeing outside of the box (he has two) on soft stuff like couches, laundry piles, etc... but never any issue with carpets or beds (except for his and the dog's beds)
- I would not say that hes been spraying, as often times this is a full bladder release type situation
Living situations
- When we got him, I had 5 roommates and one of them had a dog who was only a few years old
- We've had to relocate roughly 4 times since we got him due to many life changes, though he always seemed to adjust within in a few days and was comfortable and happy within a couple weeks
- Currently I still live with the roommate who had the dog (lets call them B), as well as the dog. The cat and dog have always gotten along well and wrestle/play fairly often
- Im looking to move out on my own in the next year or so. B has a new significant other who is over a lot (lets call him T), and while the cat doesnt seem stressed by his presence, Im beginning to wonder if maybe he is. Hes been over more and more lately, and up until the last month or so the cat has been really good about not peeing anywhere wierd (at least a few weeks between incidences)
I really want to see if its just an issue of the other people stressing him out, but the only viable way i can do that is by moving out into my own place which is ALMOST financially possible, but i need a couple more months at least to be confident. There was a week or so when B took the dog on a trip a while before T was even a thing, leaving just me and the cat alone. He was super affectionate during that time and always wanted to be pet, was always purring and was almost a little clingy. This wasnt really uncharacteristic, but it was all to a slightly higher degree than normal. When they got back he did the whole arched back thing and was extremely wary at first, and took a full day to really relax around them, but he went back to normal. It was just his initial reaction that has me wondering.
Since then, B and T have gotten more serious and he spends the night more often. The cat is fine around him, doesnt hide or anything and lets him pet him, but ive noticed the cat asking me for attention less and being less clingy, and weve noticed an increase in frequency of him peeing on stuff. Recently, he peed on a pair of shorts i had on the floor, which has been a daily habit of mine for years and rarely has he peed on them. He did it while i was at work, i switched to a new pair when i got home, and when i woke up they were peed on. Took him to the vet to rule out an infection and 2 days later i accidentally left the shorts on the floor again when i left for 20 minutes. Came back, and they were peed on. I dont leave them there anymore since its clearly an issue, but im sure if i forget even once theyll get peed on. Then just 3 days ago while i was in my room playing games on my computer, he completely unloaded his bladder on my pillow and across my bed. That was the first time he had ever done that, and it was the first time i thought to myself "I might ACTUALLY have to get rid of him if he starts hitting beds now." Luckily i had a protector on it. I immediately went online and overnighted some calming pheromone collars because the vet had said something about trying them when i last took him in. He seemed very different after i put it on, but he was definitely seeming pretty calm. Quieter and i havent seen the zoomies once when it was normally like every other day. He is much lower energy and while i did expect it, it makes me a little wary because he just seems off.
While everything was getting washed i flipped the mattress against the wall when i wasnt using it since there was no protector or anything on it. Put it back together last night and decided i had to test it, so i left it down today while i was at work. All day i just had this feeling that i was gonna come home to a wet pillow even tho he seemed like he wasnt stressed at all. About 5 or 6 hours after i had left the house, i got a call from my roommate saying he did it again. I ended up leaving work early because it was slow and i was really messed up about the whole situation. Started tearing up pretty much the moment i got on the road because ive done everything i can think of to try and stop this before i couldnt handle it anymore. But its getting to that point. Im always stressed and worried that were going to find a new spot hes peed, and he has ruined a lot of furniture, none of which was mine. I love him so much but hes causing so much stress and a lot of damage, I dont know how much more i can handle. I just hate the idea of rehoming because it feels like im giving up on him, and i know hes going to be so scared and confused and Im starting to cry again just typing this. I dont know what else to do and giving him up is the very last option, but im having a hard time finding any other options. Im planning to call the vet and maybe a rescue/shelter to ask for any final things i can try, but i think im losing hope at this point