Help! Not sure how to respond to newly adopted cat's behaviour and very anxious

Queries and discussions about cat rescue & rehoming
Post Reply
janeyshakes
New Cat Chatter
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue Nov 24, 2020 1:00 pm

Help! Not sure how to respond to newly adopted cat's behaviour and very anxious

Post by janeyshakes »

Hi all - would really appreciate some thoughts about our new adopted cat as I am extremely anxious about him. We are a couple living in a moderately sized central London flat with two bedrooms and a large living room.

The cat (called Grendel) is a big black and white boy, about 4-5 years old. He was a stray for at least a couple of years and then has been in a foster home for the last 2 months. He is FIV positive so he can't live with other cats and must stay indoors, which is why the fosterer (who has a lot of cats, and was keeping him separate in a large cat pen) couldn't keep him permanently. The shelter said that he had quite a bit of attitude and a mean right hook at the beginning but really mellowed out in time and the fosterer could pet him.

We brought him home on the afternoon of Saturday 21st so he's been with us about three days, so it is still early on. We've followed all the advice about giving him his own room, letting him hide, going in and talking to him in a gentle voice etc. He has eaten and used the litter tray so we're making some progress. He has started to rub himself against our legs but doesn't like to be petted and has tried to take a couple of nips and swipes at us.

The thing that is making me very anxious is that on the first night he clearly wanted to be let out of the room we had set aside for him. He was meowing a lot, so we let him into just one other room (the bathroom). However, this seemed to make him quite agitated ultimately, and he took a couple of swipes at my partner when he got near. It seems like he was looking for an escape route. When he eventually went back in the bonding room we shut the door again and said good night, but he continued to meow for a while before settling down. The second night was better - no meowing, and he ate some food and used the litter tray. However, last night he then repeated the same behaviour as the first night - lots of meowing, clearly wanting to leave the room. This time we let him into the living room a bit and he hid and explored before leaving again - but when he was in the hall next to the front door, he got very agitated looking for a way out again and was scrabbling and scratching at all the closed doors, and meowing. When he went back into the bonding room, again we shut the door and said goodnight. Again, lots of meowing before settling down for the night.

This morning he was hiding again (sulking?) and hadn't eaten or used litter tray overnight, and hasn't really gone to his food today at all. My question is whether we should be letting him explore the rest of the flat or not, if this behaviour is connected to trying to escape rather than explore new territory that he feels comfortable in? I'm honestly at my wits end because I know what a huge transition this must be for him, and that he's more used to being a street cat than an indoor cat. I've got him a Feliway dispenser and some toys, though he doesn't seem remotely interested in the toys at the moment. I just want him to be calm and happy, but I also don't want to get bitten or scratched! He's a very beautiful boy and we love him a lot, I'm just not quite sure how to respond to his behaviour. If you've read all this, thank you so much and any advice would be appreciated.
User avatar
Kay
VIP Cat Chatter!
Posts: 1961
Joined: Thu Mar 13, 2014 2:50 pm
No. of cats in household: 1
Location: West Wales

Re: Help! Not sure how to respond to newly adopted cat's behaviour and very anxious

Post by Kay »

I wonder if his anxiety stems from going from the streets to being in a cage, which must have been a much more traumatic change for him than coming to you from the fosterer's, as being shut in seems to be his trigger

if there is no danger of his escaping from the flat, I would be inclined to leave open as many doors as is practical, so he becomes accustomed to his new space, as well as you

his negative reactions to you sound very much as just a by product of his general anxiety and will fade away gradually when he realises there is nothing to be anxious about - you have done everything right and he is a very lucky boy to have such a home - there is every chance he will repay you tenfold in time
janeyshakes
New Cat Chatter
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue Nov 24, 2020 1:00 pm

Re: Help! Not sure how to respond to newly adopted cat's behaviour and very anxious

Post by janeyshakes »

Thank you so much for this help and advice - I think you're right about being shut being a cause of anxiety for him as I re-read the information from the fosterer and he did come straight off the streets into a cage at hers. We've given him the run of the place and there's much less meowing now, and what meowing there is seems to be inquisitive/checking we're still there.

After a very difficult day on Wednesday when he retreated into the shower and refused to come out (no shower for me that day) things seem to have settled down a bit - he's rubbing himself against our legs and occasionally against a hand held still, and this morning he followed my partner to the kitchen for food and ate it when it was given to him instead of hiding and eating later in the day.

He's still not eating quite as much as I'd like - the fosterer was feeding him 3-4 times a day and we were told he eats a lot, and so far he's mostly going for his dry food and eating about half the wet food if that (he likes to lick the jelly off pouch cat food but not eat the meat so much, though I think we are also figuring out that generally he prefers fish-bashed food like tuna from a can).

The big cause of anxiety for me now is teaching him the front door is a no-go area in case he tries to make a bolt for it. All the rooms of the flat converge onto a small 'hall' area where the front door is and he does like to wander between rooms at the moment. I put down some fresh lemon juice early on around the front door (since cats don't like citrus) and that seems to have kept him away from it, so maybe will just keep doing that.

Thank you again! Hugely appreciated.
User avatar
Kay
VIP Cat Chatter!
Posts: 1961
Joined: Thu Mar 13, 2014 2:50 pm
No. of cats in household: 1
Location: West Wales

Re: Help! Not sure how to respond to newly adopted cat's behaviour and very anxious

Post by Kay »

sounds to me as everything is coming along nicely - cats licking off jelly/gravy and leaving the bits is a very familiar problem on Catchat!

I live in a very small one storey cottage which opens directly on to a country road, and I have found it very useful to have a couple of cat flaps on interior doors, which I can close when I want my cat kept away from the front door - this is especially useful when something needs to be brought in or out, leaving the door open for a bit - also useful when any work is being done in the house
Post Reply