Help! Not sure how to respond to newly adopted cat's behaviour and very anxious
Posted: Tue Nov 24, 2020 1:04 pm
Hi all - would really appreciate some thoughts about our new adopted cat as I am extremely anxious about him. We are a couple living in a moderately sized central London flat with two bedrooms and a large living room.
The cat (called Grendel) is a big black and white boy, about 4-5 years old. He was a stray for at least a couple of years and then has been in a foster home for the last 2 months. He is FIV positive so he can't live with other cats and must stay indoors, which is why the fosterer (who has a lot of cats, and was keeping him separate in a large cat pen) couldn't keep him permanently. The shelter said that he had quite a bit of attitude and a mean right hook at the beginning but really mellowed out in time and the fosterer could pet him.
We brought him home on the afternoon of Saturday 21st so he's been with us about three days, so it is still early on. We've followed all the advice about giving him his own room, letting him hide, going in and talking to him in a gentle voice etc. He has eaten and used the litter tray so we're making some progress. He has started to rub himself against our legs but doesn't like to be petted and has tried to take a couple of nips and swipes at us.
The thing that is making me very anxious is that on the first night he clearly wanted to be let out of the room we had set aside for him. He was meowing a lot, so we let him into just one other room (the bathroom). However, this seemed to make him quite agitated ultimately, and he took a couple of swipes at my partner when he got near. It seems like he was looking for an escape route. When he eventually went back in the bonding room we shut the door again and said good night, but he continued to meow for a while before settling down. The second night was better - no meowing, and he ate some food and used the litter tray. However, last night he then repeated the same behaviour as the first night - lots of meowing, clearly wanting to leave the room. This time we let him into the living room a bit and he hid and explored before leaving again - but when he was in the hall next to the front door, he got very agitated looking for a way out again and was scrabbling and scratching at all the closed doors, and meowing. When he went back into the bonding room, again we shut the door and said goodnight. Again, lots of meowing before settling down for the night.
This morning he was hiding again (sulking?) and hadn't eaten or used litter tray overnight, and hasn't really gone to his food today at all. My question is whether we should be letting him explore the rest of the flat or not, if this behaviour is connected to trying to escape rather than explore new territory that he feels comfortable in? I'm honestly at my wits end because I know what a huge transition this must be for him, and that he's more used to being a street cat than an indoor cat. I've got him a Feliway dispenser and some toys, though he doesn't seem remotely interested in the toys at the moment. I just want him to be calm and happy, but I also don't want to get bitten or scratched! He's a very beautiful boy and we love him a lot, I'm just not quite sure how to respond to his behaviour. If you've read all this, thank you so much and any advice would be appreciated.
The cat (called Grendel) is a big black and white boy, about 4-5 years old. He was a stray for at least a couple of years and then has been in a foster home for the last 2 months. He is FIV positive so he can't live with other cats and must stay indoors, which is why the fosterer (who has a lot of cats, and was keeping him separate in a large cat pen) couldn't keep him permanently. The shelter said that he had quite a bit of attitude and a mean right hook at the beginning but really mellowed out in time and the fosterer could pet him.
We brought him home on the afternoon of Saturday 21st so he's been with us about three days, so it is still early on. We've followed all the advice about giving him his own room, letting him hide, going in and talking to him in a gentle voice etc. He has eaten and used the litter tray so we're making some progress. He has started to rub himself against our legs but doesn't like to be petted and has tried to take a couple of nips and swipes at us.
The thing that is making me very anxious is that on the first night he clearly wanted to be let out of the room we had set aside for him. He was meowing a lot, so we let him into just one other room (the bathroom). However, this seemed to make him quite agitated ultimately, and he took a couple of swipes at my partner when he got near. It seems like he was looking for an escape route. When he eventually went back in the bonding room we shut the door again and said good night, but he continued to meow for a while before settling down. The second night was better - no meowing, and he ate some food and used the litter tray. However, last night he then repeated the same behaviour as the first night - lots of meowing, clearly wanting to leave the room. This time we let him into the living room a bit and he hid and explored before leaving again - but when he was in the hall next to the front door, he got very agitated looking for a way out again and was scrabbling and scratching at all the closed doors, and meowing. When he went back into the bonding room, again we shut the door and said goodnight. Again, lots of meowing before settling down for the night.
This morning he was hiding again (sulking?) and hadn't eaten or used litter tray overnight, and hasn't really gone to his food today at all. My question is whether we should be letting him explore the rest of the flat or not, if this behaviour is connected to trying to escape rather than explore new territory that he feels comfortable in? I'm honestly at my wits end because I know what a huge transition this must be for him, and that he's more used to being a street cat than an indoor cat. I've got him a Feliway dispenser and some toys, though he doesn't seem remotely interested in the toys at the moment. I just want him to be calm and happy, but I also don't want to get bitten or scratched! He's a very beautiful boy and we love him a lot, I'm just not quite sure how to respond to his behaviour. If you've read all this, thank you so much and any advice would be appreciated.