Probably sounds really silly but.........

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Shelly and Dora
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Probably sounds really silly but.........

Post by Shelly and Dora »

I know I can trust you all not to mock me about this as I know you all love your kitties just as much as I do....

For the next 2 weeks I am working Saturdays which basically means I am out of the house from 7:45am to 6pm Monday to Friday and then again on Saturday from 7:30 to 2:30. Normally when I'm working Saturdays I don't plan anything for my weekend as I have a really bad time justifying leaving Dora for such a long time. If I'm working a Saturday I tend to make sure I take a day off during the week. I won't bore you with the details but for the next 2 weeks its not possible to plan a day off. I have booked Monday the 31st and Tuesday the 1st off though.

Isn't it the way but that everything falls 'wrong'. Friday this week (the 5th day of my working 'stint') one of the girls who works for me is having a leaving 'do'. I want to go as I really like her and she has worked really hard since I employed her but is young and wants to go travelling. It would mean leaving home at 7:45 and probably not getting home until about 11:30pm. I have a timer battery operated feeder so I know Dora would be fed but that's not the issue.....! Its rare I leave her this long.

I'm then working Saturday morning and will be home about 2:30 but have been invited out for dinner for a friends birthday Saturday night which means I would be home for about 2.5 hours before going out again until around midnight. This gives me Sunday with Dora before it starts again Monday of the following week.

You probably think I'm slightly deranged but I worry about her being on her own that much. As most of you know she's an indoor only girl and we have a very reliant bond upon each other. Is it selfish of me to even consider doing this? I'm not even sure its an option as of yet as I don't know if I can 'allow' myself to leave her this much.
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Re: Probably sounds really silly but.........

Post by Jacks »

It doesn't sound silly at all - and it's a real dilemma for you. What a shame both events have happened on the same weekend at the end of such a busy week. Is there a friend, anyone that you know well enough, who could babysit for a couple of days? I can imagine she will be pretty lonely being on her own from early morning until nearly midnight - I would feel bad too, even if I left food and my three have each other. X
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Re: Probably sounds really silly but.........

Post by hgale »

Hi Shelly

I think all of us on here have had this concern at some point, I know when I was went on holiday I really worried about leaving my girls too, even though I could trust the lady who came every day to make sure they were ok. As Jacks says, is there anyone who can keep her company a bit? At least you will be going back to Dora each day, which is nicer than worrying about her overnight. I'm sure you will make it up to her when you are there! Fusses to her from me.
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Shelly and Dora
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Re: Probably sounds really silly but.........

Post by Shelly and Dora »

I wouldn't dream of leaving her overnight and on the very few occasions in the past when I've been out from morning to late I've always got my ex to come round and sit with her. Unfortunately this isn't an option right now (long story).

I just don't know what to do!
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Re: Probably sounds really silly but.........

Post by SarahT1 [PLLE] »

Can you ask one of Dora's Aunties to sit with her? Even if it was for one of the days, the Friday perhaps? I know how you feel. What about a professional cat sitter? Would Dora really hate that? X
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Re: Probably sounds really silly but.........

Post by HRHFluffy »

Shelly I know exactly how you feel. No you're not silly at all.

I have been out for most of saturday and sunday this last weekend and I hate being away from Fluffy for so long. I know she would be ok but I can relax much better if I know that someone can come and see to her.

I use a cat sitter. She comes in to change trays, change water and give more food. She even let Fluffy out to do a bit of sunbathing on the decking. I leave her a note as to what to do and which doors to leave open and what to look out for if she lets Fluffy into the garden. She is well worth the money as I wouldn't be able to enjoy myself at all if she didn't call in to see her. I've used her for a couple of years now and she is great. This time she even left me a book "A Street Cat Named Bob" to have a read of.

It's mainly because of Fluffy's age and her several health problems that I feel she needs someone to just check in on her.

If one of Dora's aunties can't pop into see her then a cat sitter may be a good option. You'll have to contact one soon though so they can come and meet Dora first.

Hope this has helped a little xxx
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Shelly and Dora
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Re: Probably sounds really silly but.........

Post by Shelly and Dora »

Thanks for your thoughts everyone.

The 'aunties' are all otherwise engaged this weekend. Its difficult as they all have children/husbands who make their own demands on their time. I am also fiercely independent and struggle admitting I need help....! Theres a while 'nother thread!!

I've googled and come up with a site called animal aunts which sounds ok. However the next issue is obviously having a complete stranger in my home looking after the single most important living thing in the world. I know we all live a million miles from each other but does anyone have a pet sitting company that is UK wide that they would recommend?
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Re: Probably sounds really silly but.........

Post by Shelly and Dora »

PS... could we all move into a furry feline friends commune please... that would solve all the problems!!!!
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Re: Probably sounds really silly but.........

Post by SarahT1 [PLLE] »

Hi Shelly

Animal Aunts is the company we've just started using after the issue I had at NY when our regular lady suddenly cut down on contact and told me not to bring Edgar into the family! At half term a lovely lady called Sylvi came from Animal Aunts. She lives locally but stayed overnight with our three for three nights. She cooked them chicken and fish and even left us presents for when we got home! It is expensive but worth it for peace of mind. She's coming again for the first weekend in April when my birthday coincides with my parents doing some meowing of their own in a concert so finding an excuse not to go to visit them was not even worth the effort! I was really relaxed knowing Sylvi was there and will be again. She came to meet them a few days earlier and to pick up a set of keys and I was reassured because she was a more mature lady so I didn't feel as if I was employing one of my students as I did with another company before. If you contact Animal Aunts you could say I have recommended them which gives them even more reason to deliver otherwise they have two dissatisfied clients. X
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Re: Probably sounds really silly but.........

Post by SarahT1 [PLLE] »

Lol! Have just seen your addendum. Too right! How helpful would that be?! :lol:
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HRHFluffy
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Re: Probably sounds really silly but.........

Post by HRHFluffy »

Awww Shelly!! That would solve all our problems wouldn't it if we were altogether.

My current cat sitter was recommended by a friend. That is often the best way. But in the past I did contact a couple of cat sitter's who I'd never met before. The one I ended up using was the one that rang me back and by the tone of her voice I knew she was going to be on my wave length. I used her a few times and she was very reliable.

Often these people are so keen to keep up a good reputation and they need it in the hope that you will either use them again or recommend them to someone.

If you do find one that you like the sound of, once they have been to meet you and Dora, you will feel much better.

I'm just sorry I live so far away otherwise I would love nothing more than to come and sit with Dora.

I've just read Sarah's post whilst previewing my own.

There you go then Shelly. Sarah's used them before and they sound fantastic. Wish they were near me. I think that is great news :D
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Shelly and Dora
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Re: Probably sounds really silly but.........

Post by Shelly and Dora »

The thought of it all scares me enormously however I'm going to call animal aunts tomorrow to see if I can arrange a meeting with them in advance of Friday. Dora is a very scaredy girl so doubt she'd get too involved but even if someone was here, turned the TV on and sat watching it for an hour would be better than nothing maybe?

I'm really not sure and guess I'll probably end up not going out either Friday or Saturday evenings; however, maybe worth a bit of investigation?! Apart from being my Baby girl and the most important thing in my life, Dora is also my best friend and I love her more than anything in the world. Like I said....I'm glad you don't all judge because I'm probably classed as really silly......
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Re: Probably sounds really silly but.........

Post by HRHFluffy »

I think it can only be a good thing to at least meet them.

I understand totally your concerns about leaving Dora with someone you don't know. I was terrified the first time I did it and was in pieces the whole time I was away.

I agree that even if Dora doesn't feel up to getting involved with whoever comes, if they can just be there for a while and watch tv or something, then it will break the day up for her. The next day she comes Dora will recognise her and know what is happening and just might come out of her shell and want to be with her.

Also they will be used to looking after nervous/shy cats and will know to be soft and gentle in approach.

I've just looked up the website and I think they look fabulous.

However I must admit that if the worry of it is going to stress you then you're not going to enjoy yourself anyway are you. It is so difficult it really is.

I personally think you should meet up with them and judge how you feel about them and how Dora is with them. You'll either be put at ease or you won't want to go through with it.
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Shelly and Dora
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Re: Probably sounds really silly but.........

Post by Shelly and Dora »

I'm starting to think that a meeting is a good idea even if I don't use them this weekend. It might be nice to have someone on hand who Dora is comfortable with, even if that means a fortnightly visit or something similar. Now the ex is out of the equation I need someone else on call IF needed
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Re: Probably sounds really silly but.........

Post by SarahT1 [PLLE] »

Good idea, Shelly. As reluctant as I am to leave our babies we have to do so to see my parents and as much as OH loves them if I declared a moritorium on all holidays it wouldn't be a popular option! I'd rather use the sitter than the cat hotel and also you can call on the sitter for occasions like this when the cat hotel would be gratuitous! X
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Re: Probably sounds really silly but.........

Post by HRHFluffy »

I agree that it would be good to have a meet up with them with a view to using them in the future. Let us know how you get on. They do look very good. If Dora can get used to them it would make you feel less guilty and under pressure if you have to leave her. It will give you peace of mind. Hopefully :D
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Re: Probably sounds really silly but.........

Post by meriad »

Shelly, probably not what you want to hear, but trust me - Dora WILL be fine. Chances are she'll spend most of the day and evening fast asleep and not even notice that you haven't been home as much as normal. As long as there is food and water she'll be OK, and then when you do come home you'll have enough time for a cuddle or two. Go out, meet your friends for the dinner, go to your colleagues leaving drinks to say good bye to her and have fun.

Make no mistake, I love my cats to bits and love being home with them, but I still have a life and do go out after work and often spend both days of the weekend out and about as well as all day at work... the cats are fine. Admittedly I do have more than one so they have each other for company, but still - just having cats doesn't mean I can't have a life myself.

As a matter of interest, have you ever thought about getting a furry pal for Dora; that way she'd have company when you're out ;) and you wouldn't have to worry as much.
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Re: Probably sounds really silly but.........

Post by greenkitty »

I have to agree with Meriad, Dora will be fine on her own. Cats don't think the same as we do and don't have the same emotions as humans. It's important that you go and enjoy your evening with your friends.
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Lyn from Australia
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Re: Probably sounds really silly but.........

Post by Lyn from Australia »

This type of thing rarely happens to me any more, now that I don't live near family, but I miss my puds even if I'm out for half a day of shopping or running errands, and I well remember the guilt of being away from home for long periods of time.

I've always felt that my cats almost go into a state of "suspended animation" when I'm out for long periods, as they never seem to eat the extra food I leave out, or even use the litter bowls/extra litter bowls as much as I would expect.

While I'm sure Darling Dora will be fine, with your concerns for her health hiring someone reliable to look in on her is the best option for you (otherwise you'd never enjoy yourself) and for her.

I love reading about your concern Shelly, you help to make me feel like I'm not a complete nutter over my cats and that my "obsessive" concern for them is not at all abnormal.
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Re: Probably sounds really silly but.........

Post by Camdengirl »

Lyn from Australia wrote:I've always felt that my cats almost go into a state of "suspended animation" when I'm out for long periods, as they never seem to eat the extra food I leave out, or even use the litter bowls/extra litter bowls as much as I would expect.
I believe that state is known as 'sleeping', Lyn! ;)
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Re: Probably sounds really silly but.........

Post by PeanutsFriend »

Poor you. You will miss her and she you. Her emotional state will be sad. I am sure physically her food and water will be there. A warm blanket.
My cats hate strangers. Not sure a sitter would be much help. They are not you.
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Re: Probably sounds really silly but.........

Post by Camdengirl »

I know none of us likes to leave our cats for long periods, and it's especially hard to leave them if we are going away, but I think there is a danger of losing perspective here. We all have a tendency to project our own feelings and emotions onto our pets, but cats are very different from humans, and I really don't believe they sit around pining all day while we are out at work. Every cat I've ever had has spent the bulk of any day I've been home paying me little attention (even Clay, who was blind and so had limited ability to entertain himself). Yes, some of them like to sleep/wash/eat in the same room as me, but I don't think they'd be that fussed if I wasn't there. I do believe they are pleased to see me when I come home after having been out all day, but I don't think that's because they've been sad and lonely without me (nor do I believe my boyfriend has been sad and lonely all day when he is pleased to see me!). I agree that pets need time and attention, and I certainly don't think a house cat should routinely be left alone from daybreak until midnight, but on the odd occasion it's not going to do any harm.
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