Need help - cats fighting.

[Kanichen]

Hi All,

Used to use this forum years ago and you were all so helpful, I'm hoping for help again now. This is going to be long so please bear with me.

I have 2 lovely cats, Lola and Dexter, unfortunately anytime they are in the same room together they end up tearing strips off each other

For background, We had 2 cats Charlie and Harry - brothers we had from kittens. Harry sadly died of heart failure aged 3 in 2010, so in early 2011 we adopted Lola from the RSPCA. We slowly bonded Charlie and Lola and they became friends, playing together, eating together. Complete success. Our daughter arrived in 2013, Lola sadly was not happy about this and wouldn't be around if our daughter was, but used to come in in the evenings once she'd gone to bed. Sadly Charlie succumbed to heart failure in 2014 and a month or 2 later we moved house.

Lola adapted to being a single cat well, but still won't be in the house if Imogen is awake. So we were missing Charlie's companionship, so we bought a main coon kitten in May 2015 - cue Dexter. Hes fabulous, he is a soppy lap cat, very patient with our now 3 year old, joining in tea parties etc. Naively, because all had gone so well with Lola and Charlie we assumed she'd have no problem accepting a small kitten. We thought wrong We shut him in his own bedroom at night because even from being a kitten, Lola has NOT been happy with his arrival. Now she doesn't come in in the evenings until he's in bed, then she comes in and sleeps on our bed with us at night.

We've had Dex over a year and other than the odd hiss if they cross paths it hasn't been an issue. I naively hoped once he was neutered (breeder said not to do him before 18 months) and he was going out too that the animosity would die down. Sadly its got ALOT worse.

Dex was neutered a month or so ago and we started letting him out. This week they have had 2 nasty fights, one at feeding time (we feed them separately) and then this evening. Lola actually came in this evening, which was lovely. So she was curled up asleep on the sofa with us. Dexter came in and just went nuts - they both ended up rolling around like one ball of fur, fur flying everywhere and Lola has split his nose open.

I bought Feliway Friends last week and Lola is definitely more chilled, but Dex as I say is worse

What can I do to stop the fighting?? I've given up all hope of them being friends, I just need them to tolerate each other. This is a 3 story 4 bedroom town house, there is plenty of room for them to coexist!!

[issiandarchie+68]

Hi Kanichen, what a dilemma and quite scary for your child to witness. In my youth in the 1950s/60s, I don't remember seeing this problem, even though we had lots of cats about the place. There was very little traffic and a lot more open spaces so the cats would come and go as they pleased, rarely crossing paths, sometimes only coming in when I waved the food and called, usually carrying a little present for me. Forgive me for saying this, but I am of the old school when it comes to cat raising. I think it will only get much worse. There are lots of articles on the internet about this subject you might want to read but, as my Vet said to my brother after yet another escalating cat fight injury, find a home for one of them, they are very unhappy. Fortunately, we took in the female and both cats lived happily and contentedly for many years. I have twice tried Feliway, once for a newbie who was nervously peeing in a corner of the hall and again for a nervous cat. It didn't work, my other normally placid cats became irritable and slightly aggressive, as if they sensed there was another cat in the house but couldn't find it. As soon as I removed, all went back to normal. Incidentally, as it's usually the female who is top cat in the home, Lola must be confused and very put out. I'm not suggesting abandoning one of them, I know you wouldn't, but maybe Cats Protection can help? I had a lovely cat dumped on my Glasgow allotment, but despite the usual searches, including featuring her on STV news, we couldn't trace the owner. I called her Chunky because she was so skinny. I fed her but couldn't bring the darling home as she didn't tolerate other cats. CP took her in, returned her to health and within 3 weeks, she was adopted. Still lives happily with her new family. I'm sure not every forum member will agree with me but that doesn't matter. Someone will come up with a solution that suits your family, I do hope so. Good luck.

Issi

[Crewella]

The hormone level will only just be levelling out, so this might be a good time to try going back to square one, separating them and then going through the introduction process as if they were new cats. The smell of an un-neutered male is very likely to upset a female, so it's no surprise that Lola took exception to him. The Cat Chat guide to introductions is good for basic info:

http://www.catchat.org/index.php/new-cat-introductions