I keep dreaming of him

Help & Support for those who have lost a beloved cat
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Bertie 2017
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I keep dreaming of him

Post by Bertie 2017 »

Hi I often dream of my dear cat Bertie ,,usually I find them a pleasure ,a secret place .
We can meet ,but now my dreams seem too have a dark side ,I have a huge sliding door ,
On the back of my home ,I dream Bertie is outside ,meowing too come in ,so I open the door .but he refuses too come in ,so I dragged him in ,then the dream ends ,and I awake back to
The real world ,for a slit second ,I believe he’s returning too me ,then it hits me he’s gone
Why are I dreaming like this ? Has Bertie stopped loving me ,is he angry I had too let
Him go ? These dreams I feel were keeping us connected ,in sprit and memories ,now
I feel ,that Bertie has cut the connection between us ,I know it sounds strange ,
But I do believe in the after life
Nicky brown
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Re: I keep dreaming of him

Post by Nicky brown »

Hi again
Well I don't really believe in unexplained things but I dabble when I need to. I bought myself two crystals when Hendrick died. I can't remember the names though I chose them for their properties and colour - ginger like Hendy. On Thursday one fell out of my pocket and I lost it. I then had the most awful day at work where I got into a humiliating scenario with my boss who was just being down right nasty. She doesn't know about Hendrick even though it's only 3 weeks tonight - she is not a cat person and would not understand at all. I wondered was the lost stone a warning as I realised I had lost it before the incident. I suppose we can link a lot of things in our lives to signs, if we really want to - like horoscopes. I think if you want to believe in signs then you should always look for the good in them and not the bad. If your dreams, no matter how dark, are a good sign - what could that good sign be saying.
mmarsh
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Re: I keep dreaming of him

Post by mmarsh »

Hi Bertie 2017,

Bertie has not stopped loving you nor is he angry at you in any way - the connection between you has not been cut - dreams are rather complicated and at times difficult to understand - some dreams are spiritual - some dreams are our wishes and wants playing out and some dreams are our fears and guilt's - this is what i feel you have been dreaming - Bertie knows you did what was right for him and out of love and in time you will also know this - its easier said than done i know but try not to over think the dream and soon you will find you are having happier dreams of him - in spirit know that he is healthy and being well looked after until its time for you to meet again.

Maria
Bertie 2017
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Re: I keep dreaming of him

Post by Bertie 2017 »

Thank you so much for your support , I believe dreams are your ,heartfelt wishes ,but I too
Still believe ,they are a connection between you ,and the sprit world ,I should know ,
That Bertie wouldn’t be angry ,with me for letting him go ,I suppose , I am angry with myself .for stopping fighting ,the Pdsa vets ,and I fought for over three weeks ,trying too save him .
But had shown a little improvement ,on the outside he looked perfectly normal and healthy .
But something was very wrong inside ,he’s. Bladder was fit too burst ,and wasn’t ,emptying
With out the aid of a vet ,and on the night he died ,I noticed blood coming of of his bum ,
And he would cry out ,if I touch his belly ,Bertie loved a tummy tickle ,I even spotted him
By the bedroom radiator ,with his tummy pressed up too it ,that’s why I decided it was
Time too stop fighting a losing battle ,and let him die ,in the kindest way possible ,
Bertie was P T S on the 25 November 2017 ,he went quickly and painlessly ,for which I
Will be forever grateful ,but grief always makes you feel ,you could have done something
Different ,when it’s obvious , this is out of your hands ,but not a day goes by without me
Thinking and About longing for him ,each day I am fighting my own battles ,trying too
Get. On with my life the best way I can ,but it’s so hard at times ,thanks xx
Nicky brown
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Re: I keep dreaming of him

Post by Nicky brown »

Hi again
Do you have anyone sharing your grief with you? I am lucky in that regard as my husband misses Hendrick terribly too. That said, it can be hard watching others suffer as well as you.
Hendrick was the first cat I have physically instructed to be PTS at the vets. My husband took our cats Tabitha and Jasmine a number of years ago. Tabitha had sudden kidney failure and Jasmine had epilepsy, eight months after a stroke. Both had lived long good lives - unlike Hendrick. My husband took both to the vet after I said my good byes at home. With Hendrick though, like your Bertie, there was nothing else wrong with him, just, and I say just loosely, spinal damage, nerve damage and probable bladder problems. I was looking into his loving eyes and talking to him and he was purring as if nothing was wrong and wanted tickled like nothing was wrong and I, like you, had to make that awful decision. My husband says it was not the right decision but the kind decision and he is correct. The right decision was of course to give him life - everyone wants to live. I was in a car crash 4 years ago and I remember in the split second before impact, saying out loud, I dont want to die but....... Is it kind to let a cat live with paralysis, bladder problems and bowel problems? What would happen to such cats in the wild. Would they have a painless, quick passing by nodding off to sleep - no. Would they be like their mates and run up trees and hunt and play - no. We both did the kindest things we could, putting our cats first and not ourselves. I wish I had Hendrick here right this minute but I believe if he was here, whilst I would be happy, he would be very very sad - unable to be the proud cat he was. We all die, some of us young and some of us old, some of us by natural causes and some by awful accidents but it happens every single day. Maybe our destinies are predetermined, maybe if the terrible accidents that took Hendtick and Bertie hadn't happened, there would just have been something else waiting round the next corner. What is round the next corner for ourselves? We don't know so we have to find things to make us appreciate each day and the gift that that is.
Bertie 2017
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Re: I keep dreaming of him

Post by Bertie 2017 »

Hi Vicky ,yes your right ,we are connected ,by our cats having similar injuries ,except my
Bertie could walk perfectly ,and your right ,by keeping our pets alive wouldn’t have been fair ,as speak of Bertie ,when I say this ,I could have learned too keep him alive by ,
Learning tooo expresse his bladder 3 x daily ,add too that daily baths ,and even nappies ,
No that would have killed Bertie ,in sprit and character ,I would have Bertie but he
Would have paid a high price for it ,add too that ,his quality of life would be zero ,I
Recall my Bertie ,as a cat who lived his short life ,too the fullest ,he was a very intelligent
And independent cat ,who had his day mapped out ,from getting his paws out of bed
Till putting them back in ,at night ,Bertie will always be remembered as a happy cat ,
A funny cat always getting into trouble ,both at home ,and in the neighbourhood ,coming
Home with scars from his many battles ,and always killing things often twice his size
Yes Bertie lived the purrfect life ,even up too the night of his passing ,the song my way
Is him too a T ,because he lived his life ,his way on his terms and conditions ,letting him go.
Was my last act of love ,too him ,yes I get lots of support from friends and websites
Like this one ,but sadly not from my family ,who have just carried on with their life s
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BobbiRobbie
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Re: I keep dreaming of him

Post by BobbiRobbie »

I very much believe in dreams being signs or messages. Maybe that sounds a bit airy fairy, but oh well ;)

Perhaps Bertie was't refusing to come in. Maybe he wanted to but couldn't because it's not possible to be with you physically anymore. Either way, he wouldn't be angry as you did what was best for his wellbeing.

I've had a few dreams with my Charlie in since he was pts. One which I specifically remember, was where he had put on weight again and his fur was lovely and fluffy like it used to be (he'd lost weight and his fur wasn't in great condition due to his kidney disease and him not cleaning himself as much). He looked beautiful, and he came over to be stroked by me. With him, was my Granddad who passed away in 2000. It was lovely to see them both, and it was a comfort to see Charlie with my Granddad.

I don't know what the dream meant, but it filled my heart to be with Charlie again and see him so well :)
Nicky brown
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Re: I keep dreaming of him

Post by Nicky brown »

Sounds like a lovely dream.
I am finding the whole Christmas thing hard just 6 weeks since tragedy. I usually love Christmas but this year it feels so melancholy. Funny but I've lost many cats over the years in all different circumstances but my last two losses have hit me so so hard. I thought you got tougher and braver as you got older but it feels like the reverse. ☹️
Bertie 2017
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Re: I keep dreaming of him

Post by Bertie 2017 »

Hi thanks for your support ,yes I am in a pickle over ,deciding ,what to do this Christmas ,
Last year was ,so hard because ,I only lost my Bertie ,on the 25 November ,so I understand
Your pain ,as for dreams ,yes I believe ,they are a strong link ,too the after life ,I have had many dreams about Bertie ,even one ,with my mum ,holding him ,my last one as I have said.
Was him refusing ,too come in ,I believe it , was his way of telling me ,it was time to move
On ,and cross the rainbow bridge ,I know it’s hard too fully let go ,but every time I see ,
A rainbow ,I am sure it’s Bertie telling me here’s happy and safe ,and sending his love
Too me ,and I believe ,we won’t be parted ,forever ,we will meet again ,
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