Introducing 2 cats advice please!!

[Courk27]

Hello! I’m in need of some advise please!

I’m in the process of introducing a new kitten to my older kitten. The older is 7 months (neutered male, BSH) and the younger is 13 weeks (also male, ragdoll mix).

I’m really struggling to read the older cats behaviour towards the little one. He’s generally gentle, though is prone to playing rough - but it’s hard to tell if he’s being aggressive to the little one or not.

Working on a slow introduction. They’re watching each other through glass and are having short interactions daily. The older does like to stalk the little one and will make a lot of trilling sounds. His ‘slapping’ of the little one is with his claws retracted, which seems friendly enough but he is relentless - will not leave the kitten alone at all. The past two times I’ve introduced them, he has tackled the little one, resulting in a lot of hissing on the younger’s behalf. He’s been doing the ‘airplane ears’, dilated pupils, ready to pounce position a fair amount too. When the door is closed and I’m in with the little one, he is very vocal and will try to scratch through the door (hence the glass barrier now) and is very affectionate when I go back to his side of the glass. I am still spending a lot of time with him, probably more with him to be honest as the little one will sleep in his safe room on his own with the door closed.

Little one isn’t doing too much, he’s pretty brave and laid back. He’s interested in the bigger cat, even after he has been tackled (though after a LOT of hissing and short period of hiding).

Trying giving them both treats while being non-reactive to each other, as well as distracting them with toys (older cat is more interested in the kitten though).

Is the big one being aggressive? And does anyone have any advice on aiding in their bonding? They have very similar temperaments so I’m hopeful that it’s only a matter of time - just getting very exhausting already!

Thanks in advance, would love to chat with you and hear your thoughts

[Mollycat]

To be honest it sounds like it's going pretty well and you're doing a great job. Remember there is an age difference between them and the older kitten sounds like he is delighted to have a new playmate, while the little one is still a bit like ohh a new place and new people and what happened to my momma and my siblings? Hissing is most likely uncertainty about this new situation and new cat companion and very normal.

Rough play is also very normal, the origins of kittens play fighting is mimicking fighting, and play fighting gets more realistic as they get older. The 7 month old is much more advanced than the little one at this stage so just keeping play time limited to give little one some rest is probably enough management on your part. Personally I don't reward behaviour with food treats, I feel it sets them up to be too food focused, but many people do and have no problems later, I just don't treat train my animals - food is for eating and everything else comes from a well balanced, loved and respected cat.

I took on a retired stud Ragdoll 10 years ago and he was so lonely I got another adult cat. She wanted to play rough, she was a young 6 years old, he was a sedate 9 year old who really wanted to cuddle up and mutual groom. They found their own compromises all by themselves and part of that was chasing and stalk-and-pounce games - she would ambush him and he would give a little complaining mwow and she would chase him out of the room, then 5 seconds later he would chase her back in and that's how I knew it was ok. Your kittens will work it out just fine.

When to worry - if one starts to hide or show signs of stress, if one is casually blocking access and stopping the other from moving freely around the house, attacking, growling, hiding behind something to swipe with claws out, and possibly the most subtle and misunderstood one of all, if one is lying down and rolling and the other responds by turning away or slinking off.