Should I rock the boat?

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Simons Cats
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Should I rock the boat?

Post by Simons Cats » Thu Dec 04, 2014 10:36 pm

Since finding myself single after 11 years I've started to think about getting another cat. I fostered for a bit and loved it, after the cat went to his forever home and I agreed to take another I had a bit of a fall out with the charity as I didn't like some of their rules and attitude.

Ella and Archie get on fine and both like other cats but I worry about territory and whether I'm being selfish. I don't have many friends or family, so my cats are everything to me, hence why I think 3 might be the magic number. Or should I avoid rocking the boat.

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Re: Should I rock the boat?

Post by Fran_ki » Thu Dec 04, 2014 11:16 pm

Hiya :D
I think you're amazing and it's so lovely that youve fostered cats.
Your two in the picture are adorable :)
If your 2 get on with other cats and you feel you can cope with a 3rd and give it the love and attention the other 2 get then why not ?! It'd obviously go to a very loving home and would not want for anything.
Go for it !! Xx

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Re: Should I rock the boat?

Post by Simons Cats » Thu Dec 04, 2014 11:35 pm

Yes, I know I could cope with the right cat and they'd never want for anything because they are number one. I have the room and can afford it, plus with two spare rooms, I have the space to do an introductions and take time. I guess it's just finding the right cat.

I just worry about what I've seen about multi-cat households and whether what's right for me is right for them

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Re: Should I rock the boat?

Post by MarkB » Fri Dec 05, 2014 12:01 am

I think rescues should offer cats on approval! - there is no way of telling if cats will click. I know sometimes it can take a while, but other times it never works.

I have the tortie that was left behind by her owner up in my attic bedroom. Kylie hates her and I could never integrate her here.

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Re: Should I rock the boat?

Post by Simons Cats » Fri Dec 05, 2014 12:10 am

Ella and Archie are really laid back so I know they would be fine. Archie would moan for a bit but he did that with the foster cat but there was no swiping or real issues. Both are fascinated by other cats

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Re: Should I rock the boat?

Post by MarkB » Fri Dec 05, 2014 12:42 am

If you do decide, please bear this stunning girl in mind. Her owner moved away and left her behind. CP said they can't take her in as a stray and that she is an 'RSPCA abandonment case' - the local RSPCA have referred me to head office, who they say will get an inspector to 'take it away'.

I am going to speak to CP again, she is not being protected very well by the big charities!

http://i305.photobucket.com/albums/nn22 ... 2261be.jpg" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

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Re: Should I rock the boat?

Post by Simons Cats » Fri Dec 05, 2014 12:52 am

Is she the cat you mentioned?

She's gorgeous. How old is she? Has she met your other cats? How was she?

Any idea on her age - I have no issue but because Archie has FHS, he is quite hyper and does tend to wrestle :roll: My thinking was perhaps a younger cat would enjoy the ruff and tumble that Archie still needs to do, even tho he is now 4 and still plays like a kitten!

Archie's idea of fun is to hide under a sheet in the hope me and/or Ella may wrestle him under it. Yup, don't ask.

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Re: Should I rock the boat?

Post by MarkB » Fri Dec 05, 2014 1:38 am

She is about 7, but seems younger. There were 2 tortie sisters - they have always hung about, but kylie used to chase them off. She has started staying in over the last 2 years, so they started coming in the garden more. This one was stressing Laz out as she is a bit 'in your face' - I went to speak to the owner, who said although they were his cats, he never saw them and assumed they had moved in with someone else ;as cats do'! - I told him it wasn't the case. Iknew his house was for sale and asked if he was taking them. He said he would if he could catch them 'but they are quite feral' - I pointed out that I can't sit still outside with one of them sitting on my lap, so they were hardly feral! :) - After our little chat, one of them disappeared and Ionly saw her a few times. I saw him in thestreet and he said she was going home more. The other one (in photo) was in my garden every day and night still. I went round last week and some new people had moved in - so it appears that he has moved and only taken the one. Thevet next door confirmed that two torties had been registered with them in 2007 but hadn't been taken in since. Not only that, the owner went in and gave them a new adress last week. They won't give me any info as they said they aren't allowed to. As you knowm I contacted CP who are being all 'rules are rules' - if he had contacted them himself, they would have rehomed her, but they won;t for me.

She is a friendly cat and get on with others, but her and Kylie have a history -so integration is impossible. She is stuck up in the spare bedroom. I am not sure what the RSPCA would do if they took her away. I have heard so many stories about them putting cats to sleep.

http://i305.photobucket.com/albums/nn22 ... G_2943.jpg" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

This was her and her sister when they didn't dare come in the garden when Kylie was around http://i305.photobucket.com/albums/nn22 ... G_2940.jpg" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Her sister http://i305.photobucket.com/albums/nn22 ... G_2944.jpg" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

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Re: Should I rock the boat?

Post by Simons Cats » Fri Dec 05, 2014 1:51 am

She's stunning. I think I'm just worried that she may not "get" Archie and some of his ways, which I have to consider. Hence why I think a younger cat who enjoys a bit of a rough and tumble might.

Plus if her and Kylie have history, I also worry she may be territorial and that's a risk. I know homing a third cat is a risk anyway but I really need to consider the issues. She seems to have a nick from her ear so I do worry she may have been a bit of a fighter.

Oh it's so hard. The part of me that wants another cat, also wants to give a cat that's got it rough a chance!

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Re: Should I rock the boat?

Post by MarkB » Fri Dec 05, 2014 2:07 am

Don't worry Simon, I know exactly what you mean. We can't take on every cat. I had no intention of keeping Domino as I didn't think Kylie would accept. She isn't thrilled, but they are doing OK. The biggest surprise was how him and Laz got on from the start. They don't exactly play, but are quite happy sharing the sofa. They are both on it with me now. Kylie is upstairs waiting for me to go to bed :)
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Re: Should I rock the boat?

Post by Simons Cats » Fri Dec 05, 2014 2:11 am

Domino is cute too.

Oh it would be much easier if you knew cats would get on!!

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Re: Should I rock the boat?

Post by MarkB » Fri Dec 05, 2014 2:20 am

Agreed. The reason for my post about 'on approval' earlier - although having to send one back would be horrible.

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Re: Should I rock the boat?

Post by Simons Cats » Fri Dec 05, 2014 2:53 am

It would be. I think due to Archie's issues, it makes it a little harder.

I just took this of Ella and Archie. He is sleeping in the exact place she wants to sleep,
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Re: Should I rock the boat?

Post by nannymcfee » Fri Dec 05, 2014 9:03 am

that is exactly the look Phoebe the tortie gives if anyone is where she wants to sleep too....and that includes hubbys favourite armchair....if looks could kill ...she would...

perhaps the on approval can go for partners too .. ..40 years since we met and still trying to get rid, but he does put up with all the strays and menagerie here so i have trained him well. :lol:

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Re: Should I rock the boat?

Post by Kay » Fri Dec 05, 2014 9:04 am

is the nick in the tortie's ear the kind made by a rescue to show she has been neutered?

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Re: Should I rock the boat?

Post by nannymcfee » Fri Dec 05, 2014 9:11 am

Luca our stray was tipped ...TNR , you can tell from quite a distance as he has most of the pointed part missing so top of his ears look like ^ -- not ^ ^ think its normally the left one they tip.

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Re: Should I rock the boat?

Post by MarkB » Fri Dec 05, 2014 9:14 am

I did wonder about that, but I think i is just a battle scar Kay - quite possibly done by Kylie. The 'owner' said he got them from a farm as kittens. I am sure the only time he took them to the vet was to have them neutered, although the VN said she couldn't tell me anything other thanthat 2 torties were registered to that address in 2007 - she had the info, but said they didn't give out information about other clients.

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Re: Should I rock the boat?

Post by bobbys girl » Fri Dec 05, 2014 9:26 am

Sweet! Archie looks so content almost as if he knows he is in Ella's place. :lol:

Mark, those sisters are SO like 2 of the car park cats. I called them Vicky and Blossom. (I gave them names because there are 3 torties and 3 ginger boys) Vicky is the first to appear and is very vocal. Blossom, a little more shy but also more friendly. I'd take them in a flash, and their brothers, but I think we have already reached kitty saturation point.

Kay, the car park cats have more obvious nicks in their ears. Mark's tortie's ear looks like the result of a scrap. BTW the brothers and sisters do scrap among themselves but still live in relative ( :roll: ) harmony.

Mark, hope you can sort out something for this little sweety.

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Re: Should I rock the boat?

Post by Kay » Fri Dec 05, 2014 9:51 am

Queen Bee cats can be an insoluble problem though - I know I can never consider going back to three cats whilst Tiffany is alive, as she is still grumpy about Tosker - because he never fights back, and because sometimes she is up for a bit of hide and seek, the situation is manageable, but another cat coming in would be impossible, and would certainly bring on her stress cystitis again

she was always friendly to Trigger because he was here before her, and never resented her - and of course she met him when she was a very small kitten

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Re: Should I rock the boat?

Post by sarie » Fri Dec 05, 2014 9:58 am

Funnily enough you're in exactly the same position as I was Simon :) I'm living on my own these days and I have my two cats Clive and Harvey. They get on fine and I was worried about rocking the boat but when I say they get on fine, I do mean just "fine". They don't mind one another but they won't play together or spend time together, they occasionally groom each other and that's about the closest they get.
Clive is super playful and I felt like he would benefit from some younger company while Harvey just wants Clive to leave him alone. They wrestle a lot so they're a bit thuggish so I was worried about getting an older cat as I wanted a cat who would cope with the all-action-hero that is Clive and would enjoy the boistrous energy.
Despite all this, I wondered if it was worth rocking the boat as although I know my two get on fine with other cats, bringing a new one onto their turf is a different thing and they have no current behavioural issues.
I decided to give it a go and I found a 6 month old young female earlier this year in foster who needed a home who was great with other cats but unfortunately it fell through due to one of my other cats getting sick.

I looked again at rescues over the last few weeks but unfortunately many of them couldn't do home checks on convenient days (I work full time) and a number refused to home any cats under 6 months to me due to me working so much. I know they have to find the right homes for their cats/kittens but sometimes I do wonder as I know I can provide them a very loving home and they'd be in a much better place than a shelter, but I couldnt' reason with them unfortunately :/ I ended up stumbling across a lady who had a litter of kittens who look just like the cats I grew up with. I wasn't sure I wanted to go for a kitten due to work but I was confident my two would take to one. I picked up a 9 week old boy on Sunday and although the cats have been a bit put out, there's been no aggression and already they're both far more playful. Clive is playing with the kitten now too and the kitten is coping just fine with his alone time. During the day when I'm at work I have a "playroom" and it's rammed with all sorts of toys, food, litter, beds etc.. it looks nuts. He romps around in there quite happily and when I come home he's chilled out and ready to play with the big boys. He comes out when I get home and I leave him loose with me and the other cats and on a morning just before I go to work I pop him back in his playroom with his breakfast. In a few weeks when he's a bit sturdier and the bond with my two is sealed then I'll start leaving him loose with them but for now this seems like the safest way :) Clive curls up across the bottom of the playroom door like a draught excluder and seems to provide distant company to the kitten anyway - despite being put out at first he does really like him :D

I feel like after a lot of worrying, it's already clear I've made the right decision and as long as you're not doing it selfishly knowing your cats won't cope then I think it's worth a go. If you can find the right cat/kitten in rescue rather than having to resort to homing privately then that's even better too :) I regret not being able to find a suitable rescue but the main thing was finding the right personality for my two and I feel like I've done that very well so I'm still happy.

It's such a worry though, lots of second guessing.. it took me about a year in total to decide to go for it and even on the day I got the kitten I still worried I was making the wrong choice!

Good luck with your decision, I'm sure it'll be the right one whatever you decide to do. At the end of the day only you know your cats and what their needs are. I was confident I understood mine enough to know they'd cope OK with a newcomer and I'm relieved to have that confirmed :)

EDIT: Also, love your two!! Funnily enough my two boys are a ginger and a grey so very similar to yours too :) Ella and Archie are lovely!

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Re: Should I rock the boat?

Post by greenkitty » Fri Dec 05, 2014 11:32 am

You know your cats best and know whether they would cope, speak to your rescue, talk through your guys characters and see what they think, a good rescue will be able to match the right cat to your situation. It sounds like you have the space so each cat can get away from the others if they need too plus you have the finances to cope, all things that need to be considered.

I was in a similar situation a few years ago and following a relationship break down went from 2 to 3 and then the following year from 3 to 4!! That's definitely my furry family completed now, they have their ups and downs (I have Tig the tabby terrorist) but on the whole rub along ok together. Who needs men?!!!

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Re: Should I rock the boat?

Post by bobbys girl » Fri Dec 05, 2014 11:46 am

greenkitty wrote:Who needs men?!!!
Ah come on, they have their uses. :lol: :lol:

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Re: Should I rock the boat?

Post by MarkB » Fri Dec 05, 2014 2:55 pm

We also call the tortie Vicky - the name came from Victor, Victoria due to her 1/2 & 1/2 face :) - her sister we call (or should I say called) Juanita. :)

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Re: Should I rock the boat?

Post by bobbys girl » Fri Dec 05, 2014 4:01 pm

MarkB wrote:We also call the tortie Vicky
Isn't that funny!

Because of the garden connection I named them Blossom and Vicky (short for Vita Sackville-West). The boys are named after 2 of my heroes, plant-hunters, (Ernest) Wilson and Bob (Robert Fortune). Their parents are TC and Mummy! I know, I'm daft.

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Re: Should I rock the boat?

Post by Crewella » Sat Dec 06, 2014 8:25 pm

I have an odd assortment of cats now that have accumulated over the last couple of years - it's taken a while but they all get on pretty well now. It needs to be the right cat, but as long as you choose carefully there's a good chance that it will be a success. I have had a couple of foster cats here that I would have kept, but it's been clear that it wouldn't work from the reaction of the others, so I've had to listen to them and move the foster cat on. I know some rescues do allow a 'trial' period, and most will take the cat back if it really doesn't work out (though hopeully ot won't come to that). Good luck!

Hope you find a place for the tortie, Mark. She's lovely. And I'm glad Dom has settled in so well. :)

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