Problems introducing new kitten to my older cats
Problems introducing new kitten to my older cats
Hi I'm new! We have two four year old cats who are brothers. We have had them since kittens and are really lovely in nature. Two months ago we brought home an 11 week old kitten. He was from a litter of three. The mother died just after birth and his two sisters excluded him from play. We got him from Battersea Dogs and Cats Home and he was neutered before we took him home. They said he would benefit from being with an older cat and we felt really sorry for him. A couple if days after bringing him home he suddenly felt secure enough to be bold! We introduced him to the other cats slowly and have kept them apart at night ever since he arrived. Initial contact included the kitten pushing it too far and getting a swipe from an older cat with a bit of a hiss. We thought that was good, they were teaching him boundaries with older cats that his mother wasn't around to do. The problem is, as he has got older, he has become more rough. Every time one of the older cats comes in he runs and jumps on top of them, like a rugby tackle. They hate it and are staying out more and more. I miss my older cats and resent the kitten. I have broached the subject of rehoming the kitten but my hubby won't hear of it. Any advice?
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Lilith
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Re: Problems introducing new kitten to my older cats
Hi Rachie and welcome 
This is a difficult one!
I know it's easy for me to say, as I'm not involved in the situation, but, broken down into priorities, I would feel that your older cats and their welfare come first, the welfare of the kitten second, and your husband's feelings...errm...well...last. But nothing is as simple as that.
I can relate to how you're feeling; I was once married and one of our dogs was seriously ill. I knew that my husband would refuse to discuss her being pts so just took the decision myself. The vet thought I was right. Ex-husband and I are still good friends - but poor little Fan has never been mentioned, ever. After over 16 years. So I realise what you're up against.
However, this is also about what you've got to deal with too. Your two elder cats are refusing to come into the house and, innocent as he is, the kitten's exuberant behaviour is making your lives hell.
There ARE ploys for preventing him from being such a little thug, like one-to-one playing and wearing him out that way, and confining him to another part of the house and giving the older boys space to wander in and out without annoyance, but sounds like you've tried all that. I too have a horrible younger cat who's done her best to bully my two 'oldies' but she's calmed down a bit now and one of them will sock her over the nose and put her in her place, but it wears you out...in her previous home she attacked the kids and the older cats actually moved out. The owners feared for the newborn baby... (I love her but she is, she's horrible, bless her! She'll attack me if I stroke the wrong ear!)
Sometimes I think it's no disgrace to have to admit defeat and I don't think anyone on here would condemn you for taking the decision to rehome the kitten. He sounds great, but he might be better off in a one-to-one home or with a companion as thuggish as himself. Trouble is, it's a bad time of the year and shelters are overflowing.
Does Battersea offer to take back an animal where the home isn't working out? I used to breed Siamese and in those days some of us breeders put it in writing that, if there were any problems, of any sort, that we would take the kitten/cat back, at any age and refund the selling price. But if space is at a premium in an animal shelter, it's not always that simple.
There's a section on here giving lists of local rescue shelters. Even if they can't take the kitten in, I believe some of them will check out a new home - unless you're lucky enough to know someone who can provide a home, it's important to know exactly where that kitten's going to. And of course there's the hurdle of your husband's feelings. Is it possible to have a serious talk to him...umm, yes, I know. Men! (Apologies to any guys reading this, but...)
Well, don't know if this can help and I do hope others on here will have more positive suggestions, but all I can say is - I do hope the situation works out, in whatever way, and you have our support and feel free to talk and keep in touch - any 'catty' person will feel for you.
All the very very best x
This is a difficult one!
I know it's easy for me to say, as I'm not involved in the situation, but, broken down into priorities, I would feel that your older cats and their welfare come first, the welfare of the kitten second, and your husband's feelings...errm...well...last. But nothing is as simple as that.
I can relate to how you're feeling; I was once married and one of our dogs was seriously ill. I knew that my husband would refuse to discuss her being pts so just took the decision myself. The vet thought I was right. Ex-husband and I are still good friends - but poor little Fan has never been mentioned, ever. After over 16 years. So I realise what you're up against.
However, this is also about what you've got to deal with too. Your two elder cats are refusing to come into the house and, innocent as he is, the kitten's exuberant behaviour is making your lives hell.
There ARE ploys for preventing him from being such a little thug, like one-to-one playing and wearing him out that way, and confining him to another part of the house and giving the older boys space to wander in and out without annoyance, but sounds like you've tried all that. I too have a horrible younger cat who's done her best to bully my two 'oldies' but she's calmed down a bit now and one of them will sock her over the nose and put her in her place, but it wears you out...in her previous home she attacked the kids and the older cats actually moved out. The owners feared for the newborn baby... (I love her but she is, she's horrible, bless her! She'll attack me if I stroke the wrong ear!)
Sometimes I think it's no disgrace to have to admit defeat and I don't think anyone on here would condemn you for taking the decision to rehome the kitten. He sounds great, but he might be better off in a one-to-one home or with a companion as thuggish as himself. Trouble is, it's a bad time of the year and shelters are overflowing.
Does Battersea offer to take back an animal where the home isn't working out? I used to breed Siamese and in those days some of us breeders put it in writing that, if there were any problems, of any sort, that we would take the kitten/cat back, at any age and refund the selling price. But if space is at a premium in an animal shelter, it's not always that simple.
There's a section on here giving lists of local rescue shelters. Even if they can't take the kitten in, I believe some of them will check out a new home - unless you're lucky enough to know someone who can provide a home, it's important to know exactly where that kitten's going to. And of course there's the hurdle of your husband's feelings. Is it possible to have a serious talk to him...umm, yes, I know. Men! (Apologies to any guys reading this, but...)
Well, don't know if this can help and I do hope others on here will have more positive suggestions, but all I can say is - I do hope the situation works out, in whatever way, and you have our support and feel free to talk and keep in touch - any 'catty' person will feel for you.
All the very very best x
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meriad
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Re: Problems introducing new kitten to my older cats
Welcome to CC
I feel for you all - not an easy situation to be in. First question from me will be is there any way you could afford (both space, money and time wise) a fourth cat, because if yes then my suggestion would be to get another kitten of similar size and exuberance so they can play with each other.
How much time do you spend with the kitten to play with him and wear him out. Your kitten now is just full of energy and will be non-stop go and he'll need someone / something to keep him entertained. He can't do it on his own yet - compare him to a boisterous 2 year old toddler that just doesn't stop.
It won't be much longer before this little one grows up and calms downs, esp once he's allowed outside and can go exploring and having fun. But until then you need to be his playmate.
What toys do you have for him? Are there boxes with holes in for him to jump in and out of, things he can explore in the house?
Feed your older boys next to the little one so they get used to good things around the kitten, give them treats when they're all together
You'll get there, but it will take a bit more time and patience and love
I feel for you all - not an easy situation to be in. First question from me will be is there any way you could afford (both space, money and time wise) a fourth cat, because if yes then my suggestion would be to get another kitten of similar size and exuberance so they can play with each other.
How much time do you spend with the kitten to play with him and wear him out. Your kitten now is just full of energy and will be non-stop go and he'll need someone / something to keep him entertained. He can't do it on his own yet - compare him to a boisterous 2 year old toddler that just doesn't stop.
It won't be much longer before this little one grows up and calms downs, esp once he's allowed outside and can go exploring and having fun. But until then you need to be his playmate.
What toys do you have for him? Are there boxes with holes in for him to jump in and out of, things he can explore in the house?
Feed your older boys next to the little one so they get used to good things around the kitten, give them treats when they're all together
You'll get there, but it will take a bit more time and patience and love
Re: Problems introducing new kitten to my older cats
Thank you for your replies. Do you think the kitten may have problems being too bold with other cats when we eventually let him out? We have quite a lot of cats where we live and I am concerned about less tolerant cats injuring him.
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Lilith
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Re: Problems introducing new kitten to my older cats
Hmmm hadn't considered that aspect!
Might just be what the little yob needs to teach him a lesson!
Joking apart (because of course he IS still a baby) at the moment he considers the house HIS territory - and your older cats are too sweet natured to fight back. But outside - he's going to have to learn whose territory is whose and which is communal - and to earn his place in the communal territory - which will already be the territory of your older cats. He's going to have to mind his manners. I don't think he'll be injured - though he might earn himself the odd clout on the nose. Also he'll work off some of that energy exploring and socialising and also he might learn to be more courteous to your older ones as outside he'll be 'new kid on the block'.
Only be careful he doesn't play 'power games' such as lying in wait for the others and not letting them into the house - only yesterday I found my timid oldie, Mouse, marooned on the landing because the back bedroom (where she likes to hang out) was occupied by my horrible youngest, Molly, who was crouching, watching Mouse with such a SULLEN look on her face...I growled at her and she fled - she knew she was out of order! I agree with Meriad about your young man being full of energy like a small child, but it's not too early for him to learn manners; I growl and hiss at Moll and she gets the message. (Turns the charm on then, young madam!)
You never know - when he starts to go out this might be a solution to your problem - do hope things calm down for you
Might just be what the little yob needs to teach him a lesson!
Joking apart (because of course he IS still a baby) at the moment he considers the house HIS territory - and your older cats are too sweet natured to fight back. But outside - he's going to have to learn whose territory is whose and which is communal - and to earn his place in the communal territory - which will already be the territory of your older cats. He's going to have to mind his manners. I don't think he'll be injured - though he might earn himself the odd clout on the nose. Also he'll work off some of that energy exploring and socialising and also he might learn to be more courteous to your older ones as outside he'll be 'new kid on the block'.
Only be careful he doesn't play 'power games' such as lying in wait for the others and not letting them into the house - only yesterday I found my timid oldie, Mouse, marooned on the landing because the back bedroom (where she likes to hang out) was occupied by my horrible youngest, Molly, who was crouching, watching Mouse with such a SULLEN look on her face...I growled at her and she fled - she knew she was out of order! I agree with Meriad about your young man being full of energy like a small child, but it's not too early for him to learn manners; I growl and hiss at Moll and she gets the message. (Turns the charm on then, young madam!)
You never know - when he starts to go out this might be a solution to your problem - do hope things calm down for you