Dinner is served milady

[issiandarchie+68]

Okay, here's the thing. After losing my cats, we swore no more pets, time for ourselves blah blah. But oh dearie me, a foster home was desperately needed for a beautiful chocolate point Siamese, and yes, we caved. So, along with a rather slim, somewhat sad looking feline came a lovely note from her elderly, hospitalized owner, thanking us and listing her cat's fussy (her words) diet preferences. This consisted of only serving boiled chicken and boiled fish. (Oh yuck). This I duly did and the little lady sighed but gamely ate a few mouthfuls before gazing up at me with big beseeching eyes and walking slowly back to her hidey hole corner. Well, naughty me, coming out of the dentist yesterday I impulsively stopped off at Lidl and bought a couple of boxes of their Coshida wet food and Coshida treat sticks. Oh my goodness, as soon as the wee sweetheart heard the rip of the pouch she raced into the kitchen, meerkatting up my leg, gimmee gimmee now!. The bowl had barely touched the floor before it was head down bum up, completely scoured dish. She gazed up at me again so I gave her another pouch of a different flavour, (come on folks, don't judge me, we have all done it, given in to those liquid eyes), gobble gobble, smacking lips, luxurious wash. My hubby proffered a treat stick, down the hatch it went then she promptly fell asleep on the sofa, slept soundly on the bed at the back of my knees during the night, not a peep. Question is, do I own up to my feeding sins? Blame my long suffering hubby? Pretend I lost the note? Or just accept she will be with us for a good long while so just go with the flow? And do we 'humanise' our cats food preferences far too much? Oohh..too much thinking..my head hurts...help

Issi

[Mollycat]

Wow. Well, boiled chicken and fish isn't a very good diet for a cat. Fish is a great source of protein but too much fish in the diet risks thiamine deficiency. Only boiled chicken, I'm guessing this is prime breast meat, risks taurine deficiency. Lack of organ and bone meal is poor in calcium and many other vital nutrients. So as far as the cat is concerned you may well have just saved her life.

Is she planning to go home to the lady in question, or to be adopted permanently? If she is not going back, then there's no need to confess anything.

If she is supposed to go home at some point then you will have to come clean (for the cat's sake) but I wouldn't until she is due to go. Maybe just in case things change and she doesn't go. But you can always blame a vet! Say that ou had to take her because she was off her food and the vet was horrified at her diet and listed all the deficiencies and said she should immediately be given better nutrition ... I think that would be my somewhat dishonest path with the cat's welfare in mind.

Enjoy your Meezer time, they are a little special aren't they!

[booktigger]

I agree, you've done the best thing getting some proper nutrition in her and I'd worry about it when you need to, good on you for fostering her

[issiandarchie+68]

Wow. Well, boiled chicken and fish isn't a very good diet for a cat. Fish is a great source of protein but too much fish in the diet risks thiamine deficiency. Only boiled chicken, I'm guessing this is prime breast meat, risks taurine deficiency. Lack of organ and bone meal is poor in calcium and many other vital nutrients. So as far as the cat is concerned you may well have just saved her life.

Is she planning to go home to the lady in question, or to be adopted permanently? If she is not going back, then there's no need to confess anything.

If she is supposed to go home at some point then you will have to come clean (for the cat's sake) but I wouldn't until she is due to go. Maybe just in case things change and she doesn't go. But you can always blame a vet! Say that ou had to take her because she was off her food and the vet was horrified at her diet and listed all the deficiencies and said she should immediately be given better nutrition ... I think that would be my somewhat dishonest path with the cat's welfare in mind.

Enjoy your Meezer time, they are a little special aren't they!

Dear Mollycat, a girl after my own heart, a little bit of sneakiness gets us over many of life's hurdles . The wee pet is healthy, just a bit too thin and frankly I think just bored bored bored out of her mind with bland food. Have you ever smelt boiled chicken water after it's been standing for a while? I'm sure you have and I don't have to go into stinky detail. Sadly, her owner, who obviously loves her very much, having just turned 96yrs, suffered from a bad fall, twisted her ankle, broke her femur and smashed her hip, poor soul. I don't think she will be taking the wee cat home. Today,there have been questioning hints as to the possibility of us adopting her but, still grieving from the recent loss of our last cat, the answer is no. On the bright side, she is one gorgeous feline. I didnt think I would ever again come across a cat with a sweeter nature than my late Cody, but this wee thing comes very close. My hubby pretends indifference, but I caught him checking on her last night,chatting away to her this morning and what bets you he brings home an extra tasty treat on his return home tonight? Yes honey, she has brought a little light into our lives and she will be spoiled rotten.

Issi

I'm sure the food was clocked this morning but the lass from the Shelter, being a friend who can read me like an open book,chose to say nowt, bless her.

[Mollycat]

Then silence is golden.

When my feline soulmate died, my heart was shredded and bleeding. A piece of me died that night, 16 years ago now and still her memory is capable of bringing tears. Just a few weeks later our lodger was offered a rescue cat and thought it would do me good ... I couldn't leave this girl sleeping under the cars in the middle of winter and agreed, but I told him and my partner that they must take responsibility for this cat. I was a wreck and incapable of reliably caring for her, and I was not ready to love again - for another 3 years, as it turned out. But she came, and she was my partner's little buddy, and I loved her as I was able to. But I couldn't turn her away just for my pain. And I grew to love her, but she was always his cat. 3 years later the most stunning handsome tuxedo boy walked in, and our cat just let him. He was determined to move in, she was happy with him, and he was shy ... gradually we won each other's trust and hearts. The rest is history.

Really, what's the difference? Long term foster, adoption, what difference does it make? If you need to tell yourself that, if you need to protect yourself from the full responsibility while your heart heals enough to open up fully, go ahead. But this girl who has been through losing one human already, she has needs and love to give, she is worming her way into your heart right now, and one morning you're going to wake up and realise you don't want to lose her and make her go through it all again.

They come to us like angels when we need them and before we know we do, and they leave when they are done, and another one comes. We are not in control of who captures our hearts or when they will appear in our lives.

[booktigger]

I agree, you may feel like you aren't ready, but we don't always get a say in the matter! May be this is fate showing you that this is what you need to help grieve

[Mayday21]

Hi Issie well done for opening your home to this little Siamese. Pebbles’s is the first oriental I’ve had - & shes’s Xd with something else but has the oriental traits, talkative & follows me everywhere. Now does this little girl have a name? If her elderly ‘mother’s’ had a fall doubt if she’ll be going home especially if she’s on her own so agree that the little girl will need her furever family..know it’s early but don’t say never. Vivian & The Famous Five from Oz.

[Ruth B]

Sometimes things work out for the best, but in ways we didn't quite expect, whether you decided to keep her or not, she may have help heal you so in time you can decide whether to take in another cat or not with out the grief of the loss rearing it's head, just happy memories.

One thing I did want to suggest, I don't know if it's possible, but could you take some photos of her that could then be passed along to her elderly owner. Just being able to see that she is happy, well cared for and well fed (you don't need to mention on what) might help her and her own recovery. I know when my own Mother was taken ill, spent time in hospital and then moved to a care home, her biggest concern was what was happening to her cat. A few photos or a few seconds of video footage always brightened her up and made her feel better.

[issiandarchie+68]

Hi Issie well done for opening your home to this little Siamese. Pebbles’s is the first oriental I’ve had - & shes’s Xd with something else but has the oriental traits, talkative & follows me everywhere. Now does this little girl have a name? If her elderly ‘mother’s’ had a fall doubt if she’ll be going home especially if she’s on her own so agree that the little girl will need her furever family..know it’s early but don’t say never. Vivian & The Famous Five from Oz.

Well hello there Viv and Famous Five. Truthfully I have been thinking of you quite a lot lately and wondered how you are all getting along, life being good to you I hope, when I opened your earlier message of condolence. Thankyou for that sweetheart, it meant a lot. Well, believe it or not, wee cat is simply called 'Si'. Turns out her proper monika is 'Siam'! Not as odd as you might think. In the 1960's my Aunt had a series of Siamese cats, all with wonderful show names but all called Siam by the family. It takes all sorts I suppose (says me who called her bruiser of a cat Gandhi). I have been reading kind and well meant posts about adopting wee Si but Vivian. it's not going to happen. The shelter has already asked would we consider taking in 2 Maine Coons for a couple of months and what do we do? Keep them all? Through the medium of CC you and I have had some wonderful chats over the years and you know my background story. I have lost a child, pets and close relatives over the years, including 2 cats in 1 month, now totalling 3 in 3yrs. Me and hubby are now 71 and 72yrs old respectively, although told we both look and have the energy of 50yr olds, we have grown increasingly weary of the heartbreak, the worry,the long sleepless nights. Frequently weighed down by the inevitable journey, we long for peace in our hearts. It's time we took care of each other while we still can. Oh heck, reading over this post it sounds very depressing but i don't mean it to be. It's just a fact of life that we move on. Anyway honey, wee Si is still here, sitting by my side, gosh but she has the softest paws, and we will enjoy her company for some time to come. Stay in touch, did you take up your retirement?

Issi

[issiandarchie+68]

Sometimes things work out for the best, but in ways we didn't quite expect, whether you decided to keep her or not, she may have help heal you so in time you can decide whether to take in another cat or not with out the grief of the loss rearing it's head, just happy memories.

One thing I did want to suggest, I don't know if it's possible, but could you take some photos of her that could then be passed along to her elderly owner. Just being able to see that she is happy, well cared for and well fed (you don't need to mention on what) might help her and her own recovery. I know when my own Mother was taken ill, spent time in hospital and then moved to a care home, her biggest concern was what was happening to her cat. A few photos or a few seconds of video footage always brightened her up and made her feel better.

Good idea Ruth. I'll do that, fortunately the wee thing is very photogenic.

Issi

[booktigger]

Maybe fostering is what you need then, getting the companionship without the heartbreak, although letting fosters go is bittersweet

[alanc]

Fostering seems the best way forward. Maybe if you ever have to give Si back, a bit of economy with the truth is indicated, something on the lines of "we had all this cat food left over from our old cat, so thought we would try it on her".

[Mayday21]

Hello Issi lovely to read your post & that the little un’s name is Si. Yes I understand about fostering & taking them all. As you know Mr Top Cat (TC for short or my handsome man) & Snow Girl were surrender adoptions who I originally ‘fostered’ after losing my darling girl Mayday late 2015. Then in May 2016 the terror Tuxedo Harper was a stray kitten handed into the vet clinic where I volunteer. In April 2017 Bentley was a failed adoption who I again ‘fostered’. Then in Feb 2018 Pebbles was either dumped/abandoned in my estate & not claimed. She became a Little Paws cat. I haven’t formally adopted her but peeps say “Know you didn’t want 5, but think Pebbles is yours!” I TG, Karma or someone who was looking after me at the time of losing Mayday for guiding me to this site as I’ve met great folks such as you & although we live on other sides of the world, we’re never far from others’ thoughts via this site. And yes I did take retirement. I was offered a redundancy. Love being home with the Famous Five, being on my own they’re great company. Btw if you feel like it pls msg me via email me through this site. Perhaps if I make it over your way we may meet .. stranger things have happened & a trip is on my bucket list. It’s the thought of travelling all that way & back on my own that’s a hindrance as I’ve been travelling since 11 when my folks lived in PNG. Take care my friend. Vivian & of course meows to Si from “The Famous Five from Oz”.

[Mayday21]

Hi Issi re my previous post & emailing me, I’ve had to update it as my gmail a/c was closed. Vivian

[Catotum]

Oh yes, feed the good food! My mother lived to 95 & swore her cat would eat nothing but a particular brand of cat food. The cat turned out to have very different ideas & now enjoys a range of gourmet foods, hunger-striking whenever she gets bored & requires something new. Enjoy your lodger - she sounds delightful. It is heartbreaking to lose a cat, however they are all individuals & a cat-sized hole in a life can be a home for another.

[issiandarchie+68]

Hi Issi re my previous post & emailing me, I’ve had to update it as my gmail a/c was closed. Vivian

Ok honey..thanks. xx

[Mayday21]

Hi Issi it appears my post from yesterday didn’t go up. Thinking I’d changed my email I hadn’t read the instructions which I did yesterday on noticing it still was my gmail. It’s been changed now....my a/c was deactivated, I panicked, emailed administrator but I had to reactivate through my UPDATED email. Clear as mud...no wonder the Famous Five from Oz look at me with looks of “What’re you going on about?” Vivian